The Easy Silence That You Make For Me
by MKAmericanhero
Summary: So with all the Jude probably being gay (at least I think he is) this idea kept bugging me so I wrote it out. Also, I really like interaction between Callie and Stef for some reason so this story was born out of that.
1. Chapter 1

**So this was bugging me and I just had to write it.**

That afternoon Stef was expecting to come home to an empty house. Lena was still a work, busy with meetings and preparing for some standardized test for the high school students. Brandon was with his dad, the twins were off fighting over who got to spend time with Lexi and Callie and Jude were supposed to be at their respective after school meetings. All that to say, Stef was pretty confused when she came home to see two backpacks sitting near the front door. She looked around and didn't see any of her children and just as she was about to head upstairs to see if they were there something caught her eye. The backdoor was open so that the screen door was shut, but the glass door was wide open, letting in a breeze. Stef went into the kitchen quietly and quickly saw Jude sitting outside on a blanket with Callie sitting a few feet to his left with her guitar in her hands. Just as she was about to step outside and check on the two of them, she heard Callie singing and she stopped and stood perfectly still at the door, now more interested in listening to the troubled teenager sing.

_When the calls and conversations_

_Accidents and accusations_

_Messages and misperceptions_

_Paralyze my mind_

_Busses, cars, and airplanes leaving_

_Burning fumes of gasoline_

_And everyone is running_

_And I come to find a refuge in the_

_Easy silence that you make for me_

_It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me_

_And the peaceful quiet you create for me_

_And the way you keep the world at bay for me_

_The way you keep the world at bay_

_Monkeys on the barricades_

_Are warning us to back away_

_They form commissions trying to find_

_The next one they can crucify_

_And anger plays on every station_

_Answers only make more questions_

_I need something to believe in_

_Breathe in sanctuary in the_

_Easy silence that you make for me_

_It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me_

_And the peaceful quiet you create for me_

_And the way you keep the world at bay for me_

_The way you keep the world at bay_

_Children lose their youth too soon_

_Watching war made us immune_

_And I've got all the world to lose_

_But I just want to hold on to the_

**Jude snuggled into his sister's shoulder as she played the guitar and sang. Stef was sure she hadn't seen the two of them so relaxed since they had arrived and yet that peacefulness seemed to come at a price.**

_Easy silence that you make for me_

_It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me_

_And the peaceful quiet you create for me_

_And the way you keep the world at bay for me_

_The easy silence that you make for me_

_It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me_

_And the peaceful quiet you create for me_

_And the way you keep the world at bay for me_

_The way you keep the world at bay for me_

_The way you keep the world at bay_

Callie put the guitar down and let her baby brother crawl into her lap. Stef watched as the teenager rocked her brother back and forth like one would rock a baby or a child that was upset. She couldn't hear what Callie was saying, but she could see her kiss the top of Jude's head every now and then and continue to soothe the little boy in her arms. After a few minutes like that Jude stood up from his sister's embrace and brushed tears off his face. He began to head towards the house and Stef tried to pretend to do something in the kitchen.

"Hey Stef." The little boy greeted the blonde officer as he grabbed a snack from the fridge.

"Hey sweetheart, didn't you have tutoring after school today?"

"They had a family emergency so Callie walked me home." Stef looked back over her shoulder to see the teenager still sitting outside, not moving from her spot on the grass.

"Well that was nice of her, but didn't she have her group therapy appointment today?"

"She said I was more important."

"Well she was right that you are very important, but did something happen today that made her want to stick close to you?" Stef was met with a silence that told her that the normally honest little boy didn't want to tell a lie so he opted to say nothing.

"Did something happen at school again?" Stef knelt down so that she and Jude were eye level and the shy little boy finally nodded his head, yes.

"Can you tell me what happened?"

"They were making fun of me again." Jude kept his eyes trained on the floor and refused to make eye contact.

"Because of the nail polish?" Stef was unsure what the hell the big deal was, so he liked blue nail polish, what did it matter?

"No, they were calling me names." That made Stef pause because she almost positive where this story was going and she didn't like it. Every once in a while she was reminded that their house wasn't a fair representation of how the rest of the world worked.

"What kind of names sweetie?" Jude shook his head and Stef understood; he didn't want to say them out loud to her. She grabbed her notepad form her belt and handed it to him.

"Could you write them down for me?" Jude hesitantly took the pad and pencil and wrote down the words and handed the items back to Stef. As she read them over Stef's heart broke for the little boy because sadly she hadn't been wrong and that list was a small example of the popular homophobic slurs of the times they lived in.

"Honey, do you even know what these words mean?" Jude nodded that he did.

"Can I ask you, did these names hurt your feelings because they were being mean or did they hurt your feelings because they were mean and they carry a small amount of truth in them?" Stef wasn't sure what kind of response she was expecting from a child of Jude's age. I mean she didn't come out until she was well into her adult life and there she was, asking a child if he thought he might like boys. Stef could see the struggle on the little boys face and she rubbed his shoulder in an effort to comfort him.

"You wouldn't be mad at me right?"

"Oh sweetheart of course not, we're going to love you no matter what, who you love will never change that. And you don't have to have the answers right now, but you also don't have to let them get away with bullying you ok?" Stef saw a tears roll down Jude's face and she let him wrap her up in a hug. When he let go, Stef stood back and told him that he could help her with dinner if he washed up really fast. A smile quickly spread across his face and Jude ran upstairs to clean up. Stef quickly stepped outside, only to hear Callie playing another song on her guitar.

_Seeing the ashes in my heart_

_The smile the widest_

_When I cry inside and my insides blow apart_

_I tried to wear another face_

_Just to make you proud_

_Just to make you put me in my place_

_But everything you wanted from me_

_Is everything that I could never be_

_The cities grow_

_The rivers flow_

_Where you are, I'll never know_

_But I'm still here_

_If you were right and I was wrong_

_Why are you the one who's gone_

_And I'm still here_

_Maybe tonight_

_It's gonna be alright_

_I will get better_

_Maybe today_

_It's gonna be okay_

_I will remember_

_I held the pieces of my soul_

_I was shattered and I wanted you to come and make me whole_

_When I saw you yesterday_

_But you didn't notice_

_And you just walked away_

_Cause everything you wanted me to hide_

_Is everything that makes me feel alive_

_The cities grow_

_The rivers flow_

_Where you are, I'll never know_

_But I'm still here_

_If you were right and I was wrong_

_Why are you the one who's gone_

_And I'm still here_

_The lights go out, the bridges burn_

_Once you're gone, you can't return_

_But I'm still here_

_Remember how you used to say I'd be the one to runaway_

_But I'm still here_

Stef walked over to the blanket and she clapped softly as she sat down across from the teenager.

"You are getting scary good on that thing and when were you going to share with us that you could sing?"

"Hidden talents are kind of my thing." Callie tried to smile and ignore the compliment. They sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes before Stef spoke again.

"So are you going to tell me what you ended up saying to him to make him feel better?"

"Simple: told him what I've been telling him since he was born. I love him and that if other people can't see how amazing he is they can go to hell."

"Callie." Stef tried to discourage the language, but a small smile spread across her face.

"Relax I didn't say it like that. I told him that he had to live his life and follow his heart, other people will love him or hate him for it and the people who can't love him aren't worth his time. Focus on the love you have, hold onto it and keep going."

"That's very profound."

"Look, I'll be honest with you: he could come to me tomorrow and tell me that he is in love with the mail box out front and I would fight with every breath I have to make sure he gets treated with dignity and respect in this world. Who he loved has never been an issue for me. I know that he's gay, he may not like saying it, but I raised him, I know. He knows that I'll love him no matter what and nothing else matters. If he follows his heart and doesn't hurt anyone by doing that, he has nothing to apologize for and there is nothing wrong with him."

"Seeing how much you love him is inspiring, you know that right? You talk about him like he's your son and that love runs deep Callie."

"He would have been my son if it hadn't been for my stint in Juvie." Callie focused her attention on adjusting the strings on the guitar and avoided looking at Stef.

"What do you mean?'

"I was filing to become an emancipated minor and as soon as I had a job I would file to adopt him. That way no one could ever tell me that legally I had no claim to him. You can't take him from me if he is my son."

"That's was a pretty large commitment you were willing to make."

"Ever since our mom died, he's always been like my son. You all think I'm nuts for not caring that night if I got shot, but you don't get it. I would throw myself in front of every danger in this world if it meant he was safe and happy and loved."

"You do realize that you can let us help you with that right? We aren't going to let anything happen to the two of you while you're here."

"While we are here…that's the problem." Callie put the guitar down and made eye contact with Stef.

"He doesn't remember all the foster homes we've been in, but I do. And if we went to the hospital right now I could get my records and show you which injury came from which "home". Callie lifted up one side of her shirt, revealing scaring on her ribcage.

"Three broken ribs, one punctured a lung. Required major surgery. I was 10 years old and they left me at the hospital afterwards.

She stuck out her right leg and there was more scars around her ankle.

"The dad got drunk one night, pushed me down three flights of stairs. Broke my ankle and my leg in three places. I was 11."

"Then there was the one that liked using the belt. Tried hitting Jude with it and I threw myself on top of him. He hit me with that belt for 3 hours until the skin broke." Callie raise her shirt up just enough for Stef to see the healed scars that could only come from someone being whipped repeatedly.

"And then there was the one that locked my in the truck of their car for two days. I was 13 and while I don't have scars from it I to this day refuse to get in any car that was made before 1985 because that stupid car was a classic that the dad had fixed up."

She turned her arm over and held it out so that Stef could see more scars that littered her pale skin, only these ones were different. They were faded just like the others, but they were so neat and clean that only one thing could have caused them. Stef had seen those kinds of injuries before and as if what Callie had gone through wasn't bad enough now Stef realized that the teen had reached a point where hurting herself was the only option she felt she had left.

"And those, well, I doubt I have to explain where those came from. I mean I get it, I should be grateful that those families took both of us, but the ones that didn't physically beat me found it more than appropriate to make me the scapegoat. So I just want you to understand something, this is the first house we have ever lived in where we we're actually safe. First house in our entire lives where the parents didn't beat me or try to beat him. 15 years and this is the first time I haven't had to sleep with a knife under my pillow and it's temporary. Don't get me wrong I am beyond grateful for what you all are doing, but one day we'll get sent away and he's not going to be safe anymore."

Stef at a huge loss and there was nothing she could do to hide the tears in her eyes. She and Lena both knew that Callie had been through a certain amount of hell, but neither of them could have predicted this level of abuse.

"Callie, worrying about how long you are going to stay here isn't going to make you feel any better. Besides we are working really hard to make sure you don't have to go anywhere, just have a little faith in us."

"Trusting people hasn't usually ended well for me."

"Do you trust me?"

"I don't want to, but I do."

"Then give me some time to try and work out a way for this to work alright? We aren't giving you up without a fight."

Callie looked at the older woman as she stood up from the grass.

"I'm sorry. It's just…no one's ever put me first or fought for me." Stef swallowed some tears and held out her hand for Callie to take.

"Well, get used to it because we aren't giving up on you ever." Callie accepted her hand and pulled herself up from the ground. With the guitar in her hand she started following Stef into the house, but before they walked into the kitchen Stef stopped the teenager.

"One more thing." Stef gently took Callie's arm in her hand and pointed at the scars that looked like they had healed a few months ago. "No more of this."

Callie shook her head, "I can try, but it's not as easy to give up as you might think."

"I know, I've seen a lot of kids deal with this, but I just want you to try. Come talk to me or Lena if it gets this bad again, ok?"

Callie wasn't used to anyone caring this much about her. She locked eye with the blonde and tentatively nodded her head, "ok."

"Good, now come on you and Jude can help me start dinner and by start dinner I mean you can help me decide where we are ordering in from." That lame joke finally got Callie to smile and that was enough to make Stef feel more at ease as they joined Jude in the house.

**Ok so I have no idea how old we are supposed to pretend Callie or Jude is, but I just went with what made sense to me. I might write other chapters to this, but I have other stories to tend to first so we shall see what happens.**


	2. Weekend Plans

**Hey folks. Thank you for everyone to reviewed and helped me sort out everyone's ages. A few people pointed out that Callie probably wouldn't have opened up that quickly and under normal circumstances I would agree with you. I just saw it as her being tired of having to shoulder the burden alone and finally just breaking down for a brief moment. I don't know how long I am going to make this story, but I wanted to focus on Callie and Jude as opposed to trying to write anything romantic between Brandon and Callie (not that I don't think it's there, it's just not in this story).**

Once everyone was home, the house retuned to its regular level of noise and chaos. Once food arrived everyone settled at the table and shared stories of school or work, sometimes talking over one another, but sharing their days with each other like any other family would. Jude talked about how he got a B- on one of his Math tests and everyone was really proud and praised him for the steady improvement he had been showing. When they started to clear the dishes Stef asked what everyone's plans were for the weekend. One by one, all her children shouted something: Brandon was spending some time with his dad, Mariana was going to the mall with Lexi and Jesus was going to a friend's house to play video games. Jude looked over to Callie as they were the remaining children in the room.

"Are we still going to visit her?" Callie almost dropped the dish she was handing Lena. Once she recovered her composure she smiled at her brother.

"I haven't permission yet buddy, but if Stef and Lena say it's ok then yeah we'll still go see her." The adults in the room shared an identical expression of confusion.

"Cool, I'm gonna go make sure I have a clean shirt to wear." Jude went running out of the room and Callie could hear him run up the staircase and she hung her head and let out an exasperated sigh before looking up to see Stef and Lena waiting for an explanation.

"I'm sorry I didn't ask you sooner, but the date got away from me. I understand if you say no, but I always take him to see her."

"Take him to see who Callie? If it's somebody from your past, I'm not sure…" Lena was cut off quickly when Callie shook her head.

"It's our mother." Stef bit the bullet and asked the uncomfortable question.

"Callie, forgive me if I'm being rude for asking, but I thought your mom was…" Again Callie jumped in.

"Dead, yeah she is. Look, I was 8 when she died, Jude was just barely 3 and he doesn't remember much about her. Every year I take him to her grave on each of our birthdays, on her birthday, on the day she died and during the holidays. We sit there and he talks to her and I tell him stories about what he can't remember and then when it gets to be too much we go home. No matter what foster home we were in I always made sure we visited her. If you don't want us to go I understand, but…"

"Callie, we wouldn't dream of stopping you from paying your respects and visiting your mom. If you tell us where the cemetery is we can give you a ride, save you from having to take the bus." Lena offered with a small smile.

"That would be great, but I don't want to be too much trouble."

"It's no trouble, I can take you both in the morning if that's ok." Stef offered.

"Thank you." That was all that Callie said in response and right at that moment Jude came running back into the kitchen holding up two shirts.

"Callie which one?" Callie reached over and did the classic mom test and smelled both shirts.

"Neither until I wash them both buddy. I'll go throw them in the wash and then you can take your pick ok?" Callie left the room to go start the laundry and Jude looked over to Stef and Lena.

"Did Callie ask if it was ok?"

"She sure did and Stef is going to give you guys a ride to the cemetery."

"Callie said it was ok for you to come with us?"

"She did, why is that weird?"

"She never let's anyone come with us. Then again I guess no one ever really asked before."

"I'll stay in the car, you two can still have your alone time with your mom without me in the way." Stef tried to assure the boy.

"It's ok, our mom would have really liked you, you can meet her if you want." Jude offered up the opportunity like Stef would be meeting someone face to face.

"I'd be happy to meet her sweetheart." At that moment Callie came back into the kitchen and ruffled Jude's hair.

"You're all set buddy."

"Thanks. I told Stef that she could meet mom if she wanted to." Callie looked a little lost for words but turned to Stef.

"You don't have to if it's too weird for you."

"I won't if you just want it to be the two of you, but otherwise I'd be happy to join you. Or I could wait until you go visit her during the holidays, maybe on Mother's Day."

"We don't go on Mother's Day." Both kids said at the same time and Callie had this far off look in her eye.

"Excuse me." Callie walked past Lena and into the backyard, leaving her brother in the kitchen with two very confused adults.

"Did I say something wrong?" Stef asked Jude. He shook his head no, "we tried one year when I was 5 and Callie cried for three days afterwards, we never did it again after that. She says it hurts too much on Mother's Day, other days are ok, but not that one." Jude followed his sister into the backyard and sat down next to her on the grass like they had earlier in the day. This time there were no songs being sung and it was Jude who put his arm around his sister and comforted her. Stef and Lena watched from the kitchen with sad expressions on their faces.

"We're going to have to do something to distract them when Mother's Day comes around." Stef noted before she could realize what she was saying.

"They are staying until Mother's Day?" Lena asked with a hopeful smile. Stef finished her beer and started to walk out of the room as she answered, "if I have my way, they're staying for every Mother's Day."

**Sorry if this is short, but I wanted to throw another chapter on this story. I will probably go back to the first chapter and correct the age stuff later just for the sake of continuity.**


	3. Lucy

**Ok so can we all agree that Mariana is just the worst? Glad we cleared that up, moving on.**

The next morning the house was unusually quiet. Lena and Stef were already awake and were downstairs eating breakfast and laying out something for the kids to eat. Brandon was already at Mike's and the twins we already at their friends' houses, leaving the two mothers to tend to the newest members of their family. Jude came running downstairs first and was happy to take a seat next to Stef and dig into the pancakes on the plate in front of him.

"Hey sweets, your sister up yet?"

"She was in the shower when I came down." Lena stood up from her stool. "I have to go get ready for this meeting, hopefully she didn't use up all the hot water." Jude smiled as Lena left the room and headed upstairs. She almost made it into her and Stef's bedroom when she heard Callie's voice coming from the bathroom. She didn't listen for long, but she heard the teen singing to herself in the shower and it made her pause and take note of the lyrics.

_Hey Lucy, I remember your name_

_I left a dozen roses on your grave today_

_I'm in the grass on my knees, wipe the leaves away_

_I just came to talk for a while_

_I got some things I need to say_

_Now that it's over_

_I just wanna hold her_

_I'd give up all the world to see_

_That little piece of heaven looking back at me_

_Now that it's over_

_I just wanna hold her_

_I've gotta live with the choices I made_

_And I can't live with myself today_

_Hey Lucy, I remembered your birthday_

_They said it'd bring some closure to say your name_

_I know I'd do it all different if I had the chance_

_But all I got are these roses to give_

_And they can't help me make amends_

_Now that it's over_

_I just wanna hold her_

_I'd give up all the world to see_

_That little piece of heaven looking back at me_

_Now that it's over_

_I just wanna hold her_

_I've gotta live with the choices I made_

_And I can't live with myself today_

Lena thought to herself for a moment and went back downstairs. When she reappeared in the kitchen Stef looked up from her paper clearly confused.

"I thought you were going to steal a shower?"

"I was…I am, but I heard Callie singing in the shower and I…" Lena trailed off and looked at Jude. "What was your mom's name?"

"She singing that song again isn't she?" Jude seemed to know what Lena must have overheard his sister singing. He picked up his plate and rinsed it out in the sink before looking back at her. "Lucy, our mom's name was Lucy." With that Jude went back upstairs, leaving both women in the kitchen.

"I take it you heard something you weren't supposed to?"

"I didn't know she could sing like that."

"I think she like surprising people."

"They seem to handle this in really different ways. I mean Jude is acting almost excited, like you are taking them to see someone who is alive and Callie is acting…"

"Like I'm taking them to visit their mother's grave. I think that's pretty normal baby. I mean she's older, she has more memories of her mom and she has been a surrogate mother to him since he was almost a baby, she's being more reserved because in her mind one of them has to hold it together."

"That can't be healthy for her."

"It's not, but we can address that later. Let's just let them have their moment today and we can talk to them about it later." Stef kissed Lena briefly before pushing her out of the kitchen. "Now go get ready, you'll be late otherwise." Half an hour later Lena had left the house and Callie was waiting for Jude to come downstairs so that they could leave. When he finally came down he was dressed very sharp, like he was going to church and Callie smiled as she tried to get his hair to actually cooperate. Eventually even she gave up and ushered him into the car while Stef jumped in the drivers seat.

"Alright my darlings, where to?"

"First the florist on the corner and then the cemetery just of the highway." Stef nodded and they were off. When she pulled into the parking lot Callie jumped out of the car and entered the small flower shop by herself. A few minutes later Callie emerged from the store with her purchase in a brown bag. She opened the backseat sliding door and handed Jude the bag to hold during the rest of their trip. They got back on the road and drove for about 15 minutes until Callie pointed out that the next exit was the one that they needed. After a few short turns Stef could see that they were driving along side a very large cemetery and Callie pointed out which gate for Stef to turn at. As she turned right Stef could see the large sign that read Gate of Heaven Cemetery. They followed the winding road for a while and then Callie told Stef that she could pull over anywhere along that stretch of road. Stef slowly pulled over and shut off the engine as the kids got out of the car. Jude grabbed the bag and took of, almost running through a maze of graves, completely unfazed by their surroundings. Callie stood still for a moment and took a deep breath. Stef stood next to her and said nothing, but simply waited for the teenager to give her some direction.

"You don't have to come with us if you find this to be creepy."

"Callie, I will never get the chance to meet the woman who is responsible for you and Jude, but the very least I can do is pay my respects to a life cut tragically short." Callie smiled with a small tear in her eye and started walking after Jude with Stef following her at a short distance. When they walked over a small hill Stef could see Jude sitting in front of a large tombstone. Stef stopped walking and stood underneath a near by tree. Callie went over and sat down next to her brother. Callie handed her brother the flowers and he gently laid them at the base of the smooth stone. Stef watched as Jude appeared to be talking non-stop to his mother's head stone and after about 20 minutes had passed the fast pace seemed to stop. The young boy got a sad look on his face and seemed to speak slower. When he stopped talking altogether he turned his back to the grave and fell into his sister's embrace. Jude sat in Callie's lap as the teenager spoke to him and soothed his tears. This whole scene played out in about an hour and soon Jude got up from Callie's lap and went over to Stef.

"You don't have to stand over here."

"I wanted to give you and Callie some space." Jude took her hand and led her over to where Callie seemed to be frozen in place.

"Callie can I go sit on the bench?" Callie looked over her shoulder before telling him that he could go, but to stay in sight. Stef watched as Jude went over to a bench that was right under a nearby tree. Jude seemed perfectly happy to sit there and reflect so Stef turned her attention back to the teenager sitting at her feet.

"Mind if I take a seat?"

"Knock yourself out." Stef sat down next to Callie and finally took some time to examine the tombstone. The name was neatly etched into the stone 'Lucy Jacobs' and below that her birthday and the day that she died. It was the last date that caught Stef's attention. Callie said that they go visit on the day she died as well as other major days, but she didn't know that today was that anniversary. Before she said anything Stef noticed a short quote at the base of the grave.

'Even for me life had its gleams of sunshine.'

"Jane Eyre was one of her favorites, it seemed fitting all things considered." Callie noticed Stef running her fingers along the quote and she explained.

"For any mother her children are always the most beautiful things in her life. I'm sure you brought her more joy than you can even imagine."

"I hope so."

"I'm sorry Callie, I didn't know today was the day she died."

"How would you have known, I wasn't going to tell you."

"Why not?"

"It's not exactly my favorite day to remember. I mean yeah, we lost our mom, but that day she died I had to do things no 8 year old should ever have to do."

"What do you mean?"

"You're a smart woman, in an apartment where two small children live with their mother there is a very short list of people who would have been the one to find my mother and seeing as Jude was still sleeping in a crib that leaves only one person." Callie didn't say it, she didn't have to, Stef understood all too well what Callie had seen that day and she shut her eyes at the image of an 8 year old coming across the dead body of their mother.

"Callie…"

"Don't…please don't tell me you are sorry." Callie was getting mad, well she was distraught and it was coming off as mad, but Stef knew better.

"I was 8…I was fucking 8 years old and I found her. I had to call 911 and watch them come into my house and just take her and talk about her like she was nothing. She wasn't nothing and she was the only person we had and a fucking brain aneurysm took her away from us. How in the hell is that fair?"

"It's not fair Callie, none of what happened is fair."

"She looked like she was sleeping. What kind of cruel joke is that to play on a kid? Making death look like sleep. I just stood there, waiting for her to respond…just waiting, saying mommy over and over and over again and…nothing." Callie was losing her grip on her emptions and was hitting the ground with her fist to make her point and Stef couldn't let her do it anymore so she wrapped her arms around the teenager as she lashed out in anger and in pain. When Callie stopped fighting Stef, she finally fell into her blonde's embrace and the teenager allowed herself to be held for the first time in years.

"She was mine."

"I know she was sweetheart, I know she was." All the pent up years of hurt, anger and sadness came spilling out in that moment and Callie couldn't have stopped it if she had tried. Stef let her cry and let her be angry, holding her tightly and trying to offer any kind of soothing she could. Soon Jude rejoined his sister and Stef and without saying a word he curled into the other side of Stef's body and the blonde wrapped her left arms around the pre-teen and held him tight against her just like she was doing for Callie. Stef wasn't sure what she had expected to happen that day, but sitting at the grave of a woman she never met, holding two sobbing children wasn't what she had envisioned. Even so, sitting there, staring at the grave in front of her, holding Callie in one arm and Jude in the other, Stef felt an odd connection with the long deceased mother of the children she was currently comforting. Stef had no explanation for it, but in her heart she knew that she and Lena had a unique opportunity, but it was more than that. To Stef, it felt like she had a debt to repay. A debt she owed to a woman she never met who had, in a very round about way, given her two more children to love. The very least she could do was finish the job that Lucy Jacobs had started and raise those kids in a family that loved them like they were blood.

Nothing else was said that day at the cemetery, but in that heartbreaking moment, two mothers came to an understanding.

**Hope you all liked it. Let me know what you thought. The section of song lyrics is Lucy by Skillet**


	4. Mama Duck

**Wow, the response to this story has been so amazing especially because I didn't know what to expect when I started it so thank you all for that. I'm not going to bring Liam into this story yet because I really want to see how that story plays out on the show. I mean, we all have our ideas on what happened with him and Callie, but I kind of want confirmation before I drag him into this, but rest assured as soon as we find out what fucking happened he will be brought into this story.**

When everyone had calmed down enough to get back in the car, Callie got into the backseat and sat next to her brother for the drive back to the house. Stef couldn't remember the last time a car ride had been this quiet and she was 100% sure that she didn't like this kind of silence. She was used to the kids fighting or talking over each other, even if they had fallen asleep she would hear their music filtering through the car, but in this moment Stef felt like she was breathing too loud. Every so often she would make eye contact with Callie through the rearview mirror and she would watch the teen as she ran her hand through her brother's hair. When they finally pulled into the driveway Jude quickly jumped out of the car and without saying a word entered the house, leaving his sister to slowly climb out of the backseat and leaving Stef with a confused look on her face.

"He's going to be like that the rest of the day, probably won't say two words to anyone, including me."

"Is he always like that after you visit your mom?"

"The last few years more so than when he was little…he's angry."

"At what?"

"All of his memories of her are ones that I told him about, or were ones that we have pictures of, he doesn't actually remember most of them. I mean he was three when she died, all he really remembers of her was what her perfume smelled like and the lullaby she used to sing to him. I'd be mad too, hell I am mad and I had 5 more years with her than he did."

"Is there anything we can do to help him?"

"It changes every year with him; sometimes he'll shut himself off from everyone else around him and other times he'll cling to me like a baby duck, but either way he won't talk."

"Why no talking?"

"Even I haven't figured that out. You'll be able to tell soon enough which mood he is in. If he goes upstairs and doesn't come down then he wants to be away from people. He'll eat and all that, so don't worry about that. If he is in that other mood he'll pick one of us to follow around all day. Usually it's me, but that's only because our foster homes have been kind of unsafe so following me around was the safest bet he had, but here he might just as easily pick you or Lena." They got into the house and after they put their stuff down Stef looked into the kitchen expecting to see Lena back from her meeting, but instead she found the door to the backyard open. When she looked through the window, she saw Lena in the backyard doing some work on the plants they had just planted a few weeks prior. That wasn't what really caught her attention. Sitting a few feet away from where Lena was working, Jude sat with his legs pulled tightly against his chest. Callie soon joined Stef at the window and saw her brother sitting on the grass outside.

"Guess he found a new mama duck for the day."

"I'm sorry Callie."

"Oh no, don't be sorry for that, if anything I should be thanking you. This is the first time he's attached himself to someone other than me. It means he feels safe with her and in the past our foster homes never really provided him with that feeling. I have no problem letting Lena fill that roll. As long as he's being looked after, I don't care who he follows around for the day, though you might want to warn her. He likes being talked to like normal, he just won't respond. I'm going to go lie down for a while if that's ok."

"Of course." Stef wasn't sure if she was supposed to say something more to the teenager and ultimately she let Callie leave the room without another word spoken between them. Stef walked outside and joined her wife.

"Any reason why he came running out here and hasn't spoken yet?"

"Callie says he does this every time they visit her grave. He likes being talked to like normal, but he just won't respond and apparently he'll follow you around the rest of the day. I guess usually he clings to Callie, but this time you are the person he wants to be around."

"You're telling me that he imprinted on me?"

"In a really odd way, yes. At least for today he has." Lena seemed to understand what was happening, at least as much as she was going to for the time being so she moved on.

"How did the visit go?"

"I'm not really sure. Jude talked to her headstone for a while and then broke down crying. He pulled me over and then went over to a nearby bench and hung out there for a while, leaving me alone with Callie. I found out pretty quickly that today was the anniversary of her death."

Lena stopped her gardening and looked at her wife, "what, really? Why didn't one of them say something?"

"I think I have a pretty good explanation for that. Callie started talking about what happened that day and she pointed out that in an apartment with two small children, one of whom was still in a crib, there was only one person who could have possibly found their mom."

Lena shut her eyes like that was going to make the truth go away.

"Please tell me you heard her wrong?"

"'fraid not my love. Callie was the one who found their mom."

"But she was just a kid."

"I know."

"What'd you do when she told you?"

"She yelled it at me more like. I think she finally let herself be mad and scared and hurt. I mean Jesus Christ, Lena the way she talked about that day, it was like listening to an 8 year old talk about it. She was lashing out at anything she could and I couldn't let her hurt herself so I grabbed her and hugged her and let her fight against me. Eventually, she calmed down and let me just comfort her. A second later Jude came back and settled into my free arm and by the end of it I had two sobbing kids in my arms and I had no idea what to say to make it hurt less."

"You were there for them, more than anyone else has been I'm guessing."

"Doesn't feel like enough."

"Honey, we can't bring back the dead."

"I know, I just wish there was more that I could do to make it hurt less."

"Maybe you being there did exactly that."

"Lena, they were falling apart in my arms, I didn't even know Callie had that many tears in her to cry out."

"You and I both know that sometimes crying is the best way to deal with something, it can be cleansing, almost therapeutic."

"I hope you're right."

"I usually am." Stef smiled and stood up from her spot next to Lena. "I'm going to go check on Callie, will you and the duckling over there be ok." Stef nodded over to where Jude remained seated and Lena smiled. "I think we'll be ok." Stef went back into the house and quickly went upstairs. She poked her head into Mariana and Callie's room and she saw Callie laying on her side, not asleep, more like she was looking off into space. She knocked on the door lightly hoping not to startle Callie. The teenager lifted her head off the pillow and sat up quickly.

"It's your house, you don't have to knock."

"My house, your room, we always knock, unless it's an emergency."

"Lena ok with Jude following her around?"

"Of course, they are still out in the garden, I just wanted to check on you."

"I'll be fine."

"You'll be fine tells me that you are not fine now and not that I would blame you, but what kind of mother would I be if I didn't ask."

"It's nothing."

"You aren't nothing and neither are your feelings."

"I didn't mean to lose it like that today, I'm sorry."

"You don't ever have to apologize to me for crying when you are sad, or crying ever." Callie got quiet for a minute and she ignored Stef's gaze and looked off as she spoke.

"I didn't get to go through the stages of grief when I was little. After she died, we got thrown into the system and I had to grow up immediately just to make sure Jude was never far from me and the second that turned abusive my life was all about survival. I never go the chance to mourn her loss or process what finding her did to me. Today, telling you about that day…it made me feel like I was 8 again and I felt all those feelings all over again, but this time I got to deal with them and I had someone who gave a damn trying to help. I haven't dealt with my feelings entirely, but this time I actually get to because I don't have to worry about my safety or his. So thank you. I know it might sound odd, but you gave me, gave us, the first home we've felt safe enough in to actually feel those emotions."

Stef was again, at a huge loss for words.

"I'm sorry it took you till now to be able to deal with those feels."

"You apologize a lot for things you had no hand in."

"Bad habit."

"You don't have to say anything, just know that I appreciate what you did today. It may not have felt like you did much, but you did more for us today in the cemetery than most people have done for us on our entire lives."

"I'm glad I helped, even though I didn't feel like I did very much." Callie stood up from her bed and looked out into the backyard. She could see Jude sitting closer to Lena than before, watching intently as she worked. Callie pointed outside so that Stef would look.

"You held somebody else's children while they cried at her grave…you did more than enough."


	5. As A Family

**In my mind this is set in the second week of June, just to provide you with a timeline of events.**

A few weeks had passed and the end of the school year marked the beginning of summer vacation and even though Lena still had meetings to tend to, both she and Stef had more time to spend with their children and the kids had more time to relax at home. On this particular morning the kids were settled in the kitchen fighting over who ate what and Stef was trying to work around them as she got ready for work. Lena was going to be working from the house and the kids were all bickering over who was going were and how they were going to get there. Jude seemed perfectly content to walk around the living room looking at framed photos that were hanging on the walls as well as sitting on different shelves throughout the room. His eyes settled on one photo in particular. Stef was about to walk out the front door when she saw Jude looking at the picture and when she walked over she couldn't help, but smile at the photo that had caught the young boy's attention.

"That was taken two years ago, last year we couldn't go because the twins had the flu, but this year should be fun." The picture was of all of them at the Pride festival that was held in San Diego ever year, much like every other major city in the US. Jude looked up at Stef with wide-eyed enthusiasm.

"Can Callie and I go too?" Stef smiled and kissed the top of Jude's head.

"Of course you're coming with us. We'll just have to get you the proper attire. Hey Brandon." Stef yelled for her oldest son who came shuffling in from the kitchen.

"Yeah mom?"

"At some point today can you take Jude to that store at the mall that we get all our Pride gear at?"

"Sure, I promised the twins that I would take them to the mall today anyway. You can come with us ok buddy?" The teenager looked to Jude and he seemed to be on board with the idea. Stef handed her oldest son a few bills out of her wallet.

"I've gotta run or I will be late, but get something for him and for Callie, she has her therapy appointment today so she can't be with you guys. Bye my darlings." Stef grabbed her badge and her keys off the table and left the house without another word. The kids all got ready and Brandon offered to drop Callie off at her therapy appointment before the rest of them hit the mall.

Once they got into the mall, Mariana broke away from the boys and said that she would meet them in the food court in an hour.

"Well that means we'll have to go drag her butt out of Macy's in two hours." Jesus commented as his twin sister walked away from them.

"Oh well, boys day at the mall it is then." Brandon declared and the three of them made their way to the stores that usually carry a lot of gay Pride outfits and merchandise. The older boys found the things they wanted to get quickly and then Brandon found Jude looking at the stores selection of t-shirts.

"See any you like Jude?"

"What about this one?" Jude held up a Lady Gaga born this way tank top and Brandon smiled.

"I think we should find one in your size and get it." They finally found one that fit Jude and added it to their cart. Jesus insisted that they get Jude his own flag while they were at the store because as he pointed out, pride just isn't pride if you don't have a flag to wave around. Jude picked out a shirt for his sister and they paid for their things before exiting the store. They grabbed something to eat at the food court and then decided to walk around window-shopping until Mariana decided to grace them with her presence again. They were looking at the new electronics in Shaper Image when Jude heard a voice that sounded all too familiar.

"Jude? Is that you?" Jude didn't have to turn around to know who was calling his name and Brandon caught the look of sheer terror on his foster brother's face. Jude did eventually turn around and when he did his face became violently pale and he took two steps backwards so that he was closer to Brandon who was by now, very sure that whoever this guy was, he wasn't a good guy.

"I thought it was you, you've gotten so big." Brandon felt Jude grab onto his hand and squeeze it like it was his last lifeline and the older boy took the hint.

"You'll have to excuse us, we really need to get home now." Brandon started to walk away with Jude in toe when the man spoke again.

"Tell your sister I said hello." Jude got this mad and scared look on his face and he turned around, still holding onto to Brandon.

"Stay away from my big sister." Brandon didn't like the smirk on the other man's face and clearly neither did Jude. "She could have died in that car." The young boy spat at this so far nameless man.

"She learned her lesson the hard way, that was her choice, not mine. Tell me does she still have a taste for anti-freeze?" The man took two steps toward Brandon before he noticed the bag in Jude's hand, the same bag that was see-through plastic and had all the rainbow gear inside it.

"Gay pride merchandise, figures. You always were kind of funny like that, not that surprising that you grew up to be a…"

"Dude, if you finish that sentence I will kick your ass in front of God and everybody in this store and they will throw me a parade for it." Brandon gently pushed Jude behind him and squared his shoulders, trying his best to look as intimidating as possible against a full-grown man, twice his size. Brandon could feel the death grip that Jude had on his jeans as he hid behind him and Brandon did something that surprised even himself. He turned around and picked up Jude, which was not as hard as he thought it would be considering that the boy was still pretty small. With Jude in his arms he fast spotted Jesus and dragged his brother out of the store by his arm.

"Brandon, what the hell?"

"Call Mariana and tell her if she doesn't meet us at the car right now I'm coming into t Macy's and dragging her out myself." Jesus dialed his sister as the boys made their way to the car. Jesus yelled something in Spanish to his sister as Brandon threw their bags into the backseat. He pulled up in front of the Macy's entrance and for once Mariana had decided to listen when she was told to leave a department store.

"What in the hell was so important that I had to leave that fast? Why is he crying?" Mariana pointed to Jude who was having a melt down in the back seat of the car.

"Never mind that, we need to get home, now." Brandon floored the accelerator and was certain he broke several speeding laws getting back to the house. When they got back to the house Mariana grabbed the bags and she and Jesus walked into the house first, with Brandon following close behind them with Jude practically attached to his hip. Once in the house Jude ran straight for the kitchen and luckily Lena was there when he came running in with tears still streaming down his face. She looked up at Brandon clearly confused as to what had transpired in the last three hours.

"We ran into somebody that he recognized, I honestly don't know much more than that." Lena sat Jude on one of the stools and tried to brush some of the tears out of his face.

"Jude can you tell me what happened?"

"He's gonna hurt Callie again."

"Who's going to hurt Callie?" Lena was still completely lost and she had never seen a 12 year old having a panic attack, but it certainly seemed like Jude was having one now.

"You can't let him hurt her again, she almost died last time." Lena looked up to Brandon and slid her phone to her son with the expectation that he would be smart enough to call his mother. Lena turned back to Jude.

"Honey, no one is going to hurt Callie or you, alright, you are both totally safe here." The boy wrapped his arms around Lena and appeared to be perfectly happy to stay like that. Brandon came back into the kitchen a few minutes later.

"Mom's on her way to pick Callie up from her appointment, she finished her paper work early and was about to come home any way, they'll be here soon." Soon didn't come soon enough and when the front door finally opened Jude flinched for a second before hearing his sister's voice calling out for him. He released the death grip he had on Lena and went running into the foyer and into his sister's arms. Tears started up all over again and Callie couldn't understand a word he was saying to her. Callie pulled back slightly and tried to get Jude to calm down.

"Jude, buddy, take a deep breath and look at me." He did as she said and tried to swallow his tears in order to be able to speak.

"What happened?"

"We saw him at the mall." Callie looked to Brandon who shrugged his shoulders.

"Saw who at the mall Jude?"

"Phil." Stef and Lena were both amazed at how one word, one name, could change the look on Callie's face from concern to abject fear. Callie now understood what had happened and what had her brother so fearful of her being hurt, but the rest of the room was still confused as ever.

"Jude, I'm ok and he can't get to us anymore."

"But he knows we live here, in this city, what if he…" Callie brushed tears away from Jude's flushed face and shook her head.

"He won't, I promise you, he won't get me twice and I'd go to my grave protecting you, you know that right?" Jude nodded sadly, "but I don't want you to die, then I wouldn't have anyone." Callie wasn't sure who looked more heartbroken Jude or their foster mothers. As much as he loved the Fosters, he still thought that Callie was the only person that he had in this world.

"Listen to me, I'm not going anywhere, but you come first, you always will come first. He will not get to you and I bet you anything that Stef and Lena are going to make sure that he can't get me either." Jude looked to Stef who tried to offer him a reassuring smile as if to tell him that what Callie said was true.

"He didn't hurt you, did he?" Jude shook his head and pointed at Brandon.

"Brandon pushed me behind him and when he got too close he picked me up and we left the store and got back in the car." Callie looked up at Brandon and without saying anything she stood up and hugged her foster brother tightly. "Thank you."

"It was nothing." Callie let Brandon go and looked at him with tears in her eyes. "It wasn't nothing." Callie went back over to Jude, "it's going to be ok Jude, I promise. Why don't you go upstairs and you and Brandon can show me all the cool stuff you got for Pride?"

"He saw what we had in the bag." Jude remembered that part very well. "He was going to call me something mean, but Brandon stopped him before he could say it." Callie's eyes shut and she mouthed thank you to Brandon before turning back to Jude.

"Jude, what did I tell you about the bullies at school?"

"That some people don't like themselves very much so they are mean to others to feel better."

"That's right, Phil is a bully that grew up to a first class terrible person, no one ever taught him any better. Whatever he was about to call you, that isn't who you are, ok? You don't ever listen to what other people have to say about who you are, you push back and you tell them exactly who you are." Jude nodded his head, but he still looked destroyed.

"Hey, listen to me on this one Jude. People look at you and me and they usually write us off immediately, but they're so wrong to do so. I don't let their opinion affect me anymore, you know why?"

"Why?" Callie took her brother head in her hands and looked him in the eye.

"Because no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Do you know who said that?" Jude smiled and nodded his head.

"Eleanor Roosevelt." Callie smiled and kissed Jude's forehead.

"Exactly. You don't ever have to apologize for being who you are, not to me, not to anybody and especially not to Phil." Callie gave her brother another kiss and pointed over to Brandon.

"Why don't you and Brandon go see what the twins are doing and maybe later we can see what you got from the store for Pride." Jude nodded and started to follow Brandon up the stairs, but he stopped half way up and turned back to Callie.

"Callie, he asked me if you still had a taste for anti-freeze. What did he mean?" Callie looked like she was going to cry or throw up and even she didn't know which one was more likely to happen. She forced the tears back and looked up at her brother.

"I'll take care of it Jude, it's nothing you have to worry about."

"Isn't that the stuff people put in cars?"

"Jude…"

"Why would you drink that?" Callie was strong, but not that strong and the tears were streaming down her face and Stef stepped in.

"Jude, why don't you go talk to the twins and Brandon about what we are making for dinner and let us talk to Callie." Jude knew that it wasn't a suggestion and he slowly followed Brandon up the stairs. When Callie heard the door upstairs close she lost the composure she had been able to keep up until this point. Stef was standing closest to her and tried to put a hand on her shoulder in comfort, but Callie flinched like she had been burned. Callie bolted into the backyard and started frantically pacing the length of the yard, still crying and trying desperately to catch her breath. Stef and Lena appeared at the door and stepped into the backyard. Stef was about to walk over to Callie when Lena grabbed her hand.

"Take your belt off."

"What, why?"

"She's in a highly agitated state and she's scared Stef, walking over to her with a gun on your hip is not the way to approach this." Stef realized that her wife had a point and she undid her belt and carefully handed it to Lena. Stef waited for Callie walk back over to her side of the yard and she tried again to get her attention.

"Callie, pacing the length of the yard isn't going to fix this, if you come inside we can talk about it and figure something out." Callie kept walking like she never heard Stef at all.

"Fine, we'll play this by your rules." Stef started walking side by side with Callie and did so for about 20 minutes until Callie started to slow down.

"I can't breathe." Callie kept tap her chest with her hand to make her point.

"Callie, you're having a panic attack, you need to take deep breaths." Callie shook her head and leaned over at her waist, trying to catch her breath.

"He's going to find us and I can't let him hurt Jude and that stupid fucker made a joke about that stupid bottle of anti-freeze." Callie's breathing became more erratic and Stef couldn't do this by Callie's rules anymore; there was no way she was letting one of her kids have a panic attack and her not do something to make it better. Stef put her hand on Callie's back and like she predicted the teenager tried to flinch away, but this time Stef didn't let her get very far before she wrapped her arms around Callie, much like she had done in the cemetery weeks before. This time Callie fought back much harder than Stef had expected, but there was an excellent reason for that.

"Please don't hurt me." Stef knew that Callie couldn't tell the difference between someone about to hurt her and someone who was trying to help her: Callie actually thought she was about to get hurt or worse.

"Callie, no one is going hurt you. Wherever you think you are I need you to come back to me, ok." Callie fell to her knees and Stef got on the ground next to her, her arms still wrapped securely around the trembling teen in front of her. Callie wasn't talking loud, but she kept begging over and over again not to be put in the car.

"Callie, listen to me. You aren't 13 anymore, you aren't in that house anymore and he isn't going to get you." As if a switch had been switched Callie stopped fighting against Stef and turned her head and started sobbing into Stef's uniform. Lena watched from the door and didn't know if she should let Stef handle this alone or just wait for her presence to actually be needed. Stef waved her over and Lena sat on the grass a few feet from where her wife was with Callie. Both women patiently waited while Stef let Callie cry it out, not caring that her uniform shirt was now completely drenched in tears in the one spot. After a while, the tears slowly a little bit and Callie made eye contact with Stef for the first time since they came home.

"I'm so sorry."

"I told you, you never had to apologize for crying."

"He was so close to him and if Brandon hadn't been there…"

"But Brandon was there, just like you were there for him when you were younger."

"Yeah, and I almost died doing it, I almost left him alone."

"Callie stop beating yourself up for things that almost happened, you didn't die and no one is going to hurt you or Jude, we won't let it happen." Callie sat up, but kept her eyes on the ground.

"You have no idea, what he is capable of." Stef gently titled Callie's head so that she was looking the teen in the eye.

"No, he has no idea what I am capable of." Callie cracked a slight smile.

"Callie, what did Jude mean about the anti-freeze?" Lena had been silent up till then, but it was the question that demanded an answer. Callie got this far away look in her eye before she responded.

"After the first day in the truck of that car I had tried everything I could to get out, but there was only a screwdriver and a bottle of anti-freeze in the trunk with me. I tried the use the screwdriver, but it was such an old car, there wasn't much I could do with it. At one point, I was positive I was going to die in that fucking car and with that in mind I made a decision. If I was going to die in that car, I wasn't going to give that rat bastard the satisfaction of knowing that he had killed me, I was going to die on my terms. That screwdriver wouldn't have killed me, so that left me with the bottle of anti-freeze." Stef and Lena both looked at each other as the truth washed over them.

"When he finally opened the truck I was about to drink it. So when he made that crack to Jude about me stilling having a taste for anti-freeze it was him trying to remind me that he won and I lost."

"Callie, considering that you winning would have meant your death, we're glad you didn't win." Lena put the matter into perspective.

"Look Jude, doesn't know about that part and it needs to stay that way, if he ever finds out it has to come from me."

"He won't hear it from us. We do however need to take about this man."

"I know and I'll tell you everything, but can I go make sure Jude's ok first?"

"Of course you can and I'll change into civilian clothes and then we are having this discussion." Callie nodded and made her way back into the house leaving both mothers in the backyard.

"What are we going to do?" Lena asked.

"We're going to figure it out as a family." Stef offered Lena her hand as they walked back to the house, "and if that bastard comes near any of my kids again I'm going to shoot him in the knee caps."

**And you all thought the drama was gone, alas no, but no worries I would never let anything bad happen to these kids and not let Stef kick their ass. These problem with be dealt with over a few chapters and will have a resolution that I think will make everyone happy. Reviews are still appreciated so let me know what you all thought.**


	6. Early To Rise

**Ok, so that episode…god damn it. I mean we all knew that it was most likely going to end up being a situation where Callie got raped, but I deep down wished we were all wrong. Anyway, I'm going to resolve this particular part of the story, do a chapter for Pride and then I want to bring in what is happening with Liam. I'll probably have her telling Stef and Lena the way they had it in the show, but just change the time of year so it still in the summer time. Also, is anyone else concerned that in the promo you see Stef leaving with her side arm and the summer finale is titled Vigil? I swear to fucking God if she gets shot my heart will break.**

Stef was usually the first one up during the summer time, mostly because everyone else had the luxury of having a later start than she did. She showered quickly in an effort to save some of the hot water and when she threw her PJ's back on she quietly slipped out of the room, trying to give Lena the chance to sleep a little longer. It didn't occur to Stef to check on the kids as she made her way downstairs and as she reached the top of the stairs she realized that if she had she would have found Callie's bed empty. Stef walked down the stairs and could clearly see the teenager with her back pressed against the front door. When Stef reached the landing she could see that Callie was asleep, but she didn't look like she had slept much so Stef figured she must have fallen asleep within the last hour. Stef was about to approach the sleeping teen and tell her to go lie down in her bed, but then something caught Stef's attention. Clutched in Callie's right hand was a knife. A thousand things ran through Stef's mind and none of them were positive, but she knew that waking Callie up needed to be done carefully. Stef took two steps back before calling Callie's name out softly.

"Callie. Honey wake up." Callie's eyes snapped open and her grip around the base of the knife tightened and she looked panicked. When she looked up to see Stef, she breathed a sigh of relief and slumped back against the door.

"I didn't mean to scare you, but you do realize that you are sleeping against the front door right?"

"I know."

"Want to tell me why?" Stef took a seat next to the teen with her back know resting against the large door as well.

"Only spot in the house where you can see both entry points. My back is to this door and I can see into the kitchen where the other door is."

"And you needed to do this because?"

"I'm not letting him get me twice." Callie looked straight ahead and barely spoke above a whisper, but Stef heard her answer.

"And the knife?" Callie looked at the knife in her hand and seemed almost mesmerized by it. Stef held out her hand, "Callie let me have the knife." Once again Callie looked intently at the object in her hand before slowly offering it to Stef. Once Stef had the knife in her hand she placed it on the other side of her body far away from Callie's reach.

"I didn't do anything with it." Stef nodded her head, "I know you didn't, but the way you looked at it just now, tells me you thought about it."

"But I didn't."

"What stopped you?"

"I promised you I'd try to stop, this is me trying."

"Why didn't you come wake one of us up Callie, I told you we can talk to you about it and I'd rather you talk about it than do it?"

"I didn't grab the knife because I wanted to hurt myself."

"Then why have it at all?"

"Because if he finds us again I'm not going to be caught defenseless twice." Callie kept her eyes trained toward the kitchen like she still thought he was about to come bursting in. Stef reached her arms around Callie's shoulder and the teen closer to her.

"You know I would never let anything happen to you or anyone else in this house."

"If he wants to find me bad enough, he can and he will."

"Callie, he isn't going to come near you again I swear, I already have people working on checking his info and tracking him down and as soon as I have something we will take care of it. Not you, understand." Callie nodded her head, but said nothing. Stef kissed the side of the teen's head and stood up from the floor.

"Why don't you try and get some actual rest, let me keep the watch?" Callie looked like she was about to say no, but Stef jumped in.

"How much sleep did you get last night?"

"That depends what time is it?"

"5:30."

"I think I dozed off when I heard you get in the shower."

"Callie that was 20 minutes ago, go lie down, please." Callie stood up and started to go into the living room, but Stef stopped her.

"No, you aren't going to sleep on the couch, go sleep upstairs." Callie turned to meet the blonde's gaze and there were unshed tears in her eyes. Stef knew that there was no way around this one so she walked into the living room and moved some of the pillows around. Stef took a seat at one end of the couch and Callie took the hint and settled into the other side of the sofa. Stef was going to say something, but she was silenced when Callie took a pillow and placed in against Stef's lap and the teen quickly rested her head on the pillow while curling her body into a self-protective ball. Stef silently rested her arm on top of Callie's shoulder. Within minutes Stef could tell that Callie was asleep and for that she was thankful, but Stef also knew that for at least the time being she was stuck in the position.

She didn't mean to fall back to sleep, but she did and that was the scene Lena found when she came down stairs two hours later. The scene would have been a cute one all except for the knife that was now sitting on the living room table in front of Stef. Lena wasn't sure why it was there, but she figured that whatever the reason it had something to do with the events of the day before. Lena took the knife with her into the kitchen and put it away so that the other kids wouldn't see what she had. She didn't wake up her wife and she didn't have the heart to wake up Callie either, so she just let them be, knowing that once they both woke up they would have to start to figure out their next move in dealing with this new enemy that got unceremoniously dropped into their normal family routine.


	7. A Pretty Brazen Fuck You

**Thank you all so much for the feedback I have been getting and I am so glad people like the story. Anyway, in this chapter I'm going to resolve everything with Phil and then we will move onto Pride before I try and deal with Liam as a storyline.**

Stef woke up to the front door shutting and she could hear Mariana chatting with Lexi on the other side of the door as they left the Foster's house. Stef started to sit up when she realize that Callie was still passed out with her head in Stef's lap. She carefully shifted the pillow so that she could stand up without disrupting Callie. She quietly moved into the kitchen to find Lena standing at the counter with Jude happily finishing his breakfast.

"Morning." Lena kissed Stef and handed her coffee, which Stef needed desperately.

"Morning. I didn't mean to fall back asleep."

"No harm done, you aren't due at work until later anyway right?"

"I switched shifts, I'm on tomorrow. I figured we had some things to figure out that required me to be here." Stef tried to not address the issue directly so as not to upset the 12 year old that was within earshot.

"Right. Any reason there was a knife sitting on the table when I woke up this morning?"

"She had it in her hand when I found her this morning at 5am, literally keeping watch at the front door." Lena put down her coffee mug and became concerned.

"She had the knife in her hand? Did she…" Lena trailed off and gestured to her wrist to make her point. Stef shook her head, "I don't think so, she said she didn't and I believe her." Jude got up from his seat and rinsed his dish before walking past the women as they talked.

"You guys know I'm 12 not deaf right?" Lena looked up at the pre-teen and was a little shocked.

"I'm sorry, that was rude. What I mean is that I can hear you and of all the people in this room I know her the best, I know what you're talking about."

"You do?" Stef wasn't sure what bothered her more, that Callie was dealing with self-injury or that her 12 year old brother knew more about than she did.

"We grew up in houses that either ignored us or beat us, either way no one ever noticed it. She spent my whole life protecting me; I knew she was doing something to deal with what was happening to her. If she said she didn't do it, she is telling you the truth." Jude left the room without another word and Stef hung her head in frustration before looking back at Lena.

"Our 12 year old knows more about this than we do."

"Because he lived it with her. Look she didn't hurt herself so I say we focus on what is really pressing." Stef pulled out her phone and opened an email and started rattling off info to Lena.

"Full name is Philip Tucker, lived in San Diego up until last year when he moved to Kansas City."

"Why the move?"

"Mike said the company he owned went belly up so he relocated to be closer to his parents and help take over the family property. From what Mike could find out he was only in town to finalize paperwork with the IRS and his business attorneys."

"So he won't be staying?"

"His name is on the flight manifest for a flight leaving tomorrow morning so what we just experienced was a case of wrong place, wrong time and rotten luck."

"Well, that's reassuring at least."

"I feel like we should do more."

"Like what Stef? Find out where he is staying and corner him?" Stef opened her mouth to answer, but she never got the chance.

"You found him?" Callie stood in the doorway, looking a little bit worse for the wear, but she was awake and had heard enough.

"We did, he's not going to be a threat to you or Jude though, he doesn't even live in the state anymore."

"I want to talk to him."

"Absolutely not." Stef almost yelled it even though she didn't mean to. "Why would you want to do that to yourself?"

"Look, I know it makes no sense to you, but… My mom didn't live long enough to teach me many life lessons, but the one thing she did teach me was that if you don't face down your demons they will haunt you forever. I don't want him to take anything else from me."

"Callie after everything he did, I would be insane to let you go talk to him."

"Not threats, no me breaking down, I just have to look him in the eye to remind him that he didn't best me. Please?" Stef looked to Lena for some support, but Lena looked conflicted.

"If you talk to him, I'm going with you."

"Is that a yes?"

"If I can figure out a way to make it seem like us just happening to see each other in public then yes." Stef called Mike to try and figure out how to make this happen. She returned to the kitchen later and told Callie to go get dressed. She and Lena went upstairs into their bedroom were Stef got dressed and without saying anything strapped her side arm to her belt and threw a jacket over it to conceal the weapon.

"You really think you need that?"

"I'm not going to let him get her twice, he tries something he'll be dead before he hits the floor." Stef left the room without another word and returned to the kitchen to find Callie dressed and ready to walk out the door. They said their goodbyes to Lena and got into the car. Callie was silent for the whole car ride and Stef didn't know if it was her place to say much of anything. They pulled into hotel parking lot 20 minutes away from the house and the two women slowly stepped out of the car and headed inside. Stef was about to say something to Callie when she realized that the teen was already heading toward the restaurant that was in the hotel lobby. Stef ran after her and when she caught up to her she shot Callie a look that stood as the teens only warning.

"I told you, if you do this, I'm here with you, got it?"

"Got it."

"Why are we sitting down?" Stef questioned as she took a seat with Callie at a table near the bar.

"Because if there is one thing I bet hasn't changed in his life, it's the fact that he was, and will mostly likely always be, a very dedicated alcoholic." They didn't have to wait long when Stef saw a man walk up to the bar and take a seat. Callie had her back to the bar, but when the man spoke to the bartender Stef could see Callie's eyes darken and her facial features hardened. Callie put the menu she had been holding in front of her face down and with out turning around she spoke loud enough that the man heard her.

"Still faithfully clutching to your dear friend Jack Daniels I see." Callie turned her chair around so that she was now facing the man at the bar who had by now turned around to look at the teenager.

"Well, well, well. Callie Jacob as I live and breathe."

"Unfortunately." Callie shot back and Stef almost laughed, but she managed to keep a straight face.

"What business does a teenager have in a hotel restaurant?"

"They serve food here Phil and last I checked this is still America, I can eat anywhere I wish."

"Still have that fighting spirit I see."

"Care to see it up close? I've learned a few tricks since we last saw each other."

"You didn't scare me when you were 13 and you sure as shit don't scare me now that you're all grown up." Phil threw back the shot in his hand and tapped the bar for another.

"Three years doesn't make me all grown up, just makes me mad as hell."

"Over what? Because I saw the brat in the mall yesterday you decided to call in the troops and track me down?"

"Two things. Call him a brat one more time and see what happens and two, no, this isn't me tracking you down. Believe me if I was tracking you down you would know it, this is me standing up for my family 3 years later than I should have."

"Still have nightmares about the Mustang do you?"

"Those end today. You come near my family again and it will be the last thing you do without being slapped with a restraining order, understood?"

"Imagine how scared I am."

"Oh I'm not trying to scare you. If I was trying to scare you I would mention that your start up company crashed so hard you actually had to hire lawyers to get out of the 50 lawsuits you faced. Or perhaps I would point out that your parents' estate is in foreclosure and when you go home to Kansas City, you will quite literally be living in poverty. Must be hard to pay for all those medical bills with no job and no money. Cirrhosis is a real bitch isn't it?"

"How did you…?"

"Know that. I have your attention now, good. The business stuff is thanks to the Internet, as for the drinking; well you forget I bear the scars of your affection towards drinking. I could see your eyes yellowing when we lived with you and that is just the beginning by now I'd venture to guess that you know you are dying and there is not a god damn thing you can do to help yourself, other than make death come sooner by ordering double shots of whiskey at 11:30 in the morning." The older man's face told Stef that Callie had hit a nerve.

"What do you want, huh? An apology? You're wasting you breath princess and you remember how important breathing is don't you? Bet it was hard to breathe in that trunk."

"No harder than it will be for you to breathe when the stick your sorry ass in the ground. Too bad they might actually wait until you stop breathing first." Callie stood up from her seat and slung her bag over her shoulder.

"I have one thing to say to you…actually make that two things. Number one: you are dying soon, so I see no reason for you to EVER come back to California. If I see you near my family ever again, you will pray for death to come sooner. And number two: you think you won that day you threw me in that car, but you didn't. You thought that you won because I was about to die in there and you pushed me to the point that I was about to kill myself. I didn't die that day, and for that reason I won. I bested you. I survived your version of hell. I won and you lost. The same can be said for today because I'm going to walk out of here and go home. I'm going to spend time with my brothers and my sister and our parents. I'll say it again, I'm going home. I win, because I got the thing you tried so hard to rob me of and you're just going to die alone." Callie was about to walk away when she turned back around to see Phil staring at his third double shot.

"One more thing." Callie reached into her pocket and handed the man a folded piece of paper. "Bottoms up Phil." Phil looked at the paper and got within inches of Callie's face, "go to hell."

Before Stef could do anything other than pull Callie back, the teen remained perfectly still and in the most aggressive voice Stef had ever heard come from the 16 year old, she looked back at the man and spat back at him, "you first." With that Stef pulled Callie away and they left the restaurant and walked out of the hotel all together. Once they were in the car and on their way home Stef bit the bullet.

"What did you give him that made him so mad?"

"Coupon for anti-freeze." Callie answered simply and without much emotion in her voice. Stef had to smile. It was a pretty brazen fuck you, but she wondered why Callie seemed sadder than when they left the house.

"Callie? Talk to me, what's wrong?"

"I'm happy he's dying. I'm glad he's dying and that he will probably die alone. Does that make me a bad person?" Callie looked over to Stef who kept her eyes on the road, but shook her head 'no'.

"No Callie, it makes you human."

"It's just…"

"It's just what?"

"I almost died alone in that trunk, it seems only fair that he knows what that feels like."

"Like I said Callie, you wanting him to feel that pain doesn't make you bad, it just means you're human. Revenge is very human thing to want, especially after what he put you through."

"I've had foster families do worse things than what he did, I don't have the energy to keep hating them in the hope that they will drop dead." Stef was stuck on the 'they did worse' part and she would have asked if they hadn't arrived home at that moment. They sat in the car for a second and Stef spoke up finally.

"You don't have to keep hating them Callie, I'm just saying, it's ok to still feel hurt and angry."

"Gandhi said that the weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."

"Callie. I've met a lot of strong women in my life and you are dangerously close to topping that list and I think that even Gandhi would agree that the things you have endured are a little harder to forgive. Forgiveness takes time, so give yourself a break ok?"

"I'll try."

"Well, that is a damn fine place to start." Stef stepped out of the car and heard Callie follow after her a second later and even though Callie's past still seemed to be haunting her, this was one bad dream Stef was glad to have helped chase away. She was now left to wonder, just how many more nightmares Callie had lived through and would those ghosts die as easily as this one had?

**Hopefully this lived up to what you guys hoped to see and I left the ending like that so I could bring in the Liam stuff later on, but the next chapter needs to be uplifting because this story would be too heavy otherwise. So next chapter will be about Pride and the Fosters celebrating it.**


	8. SD Pride

After the incident with Phil, everyone was looking forward to Pride. The kids loved going just as much as Stef and Lena did and it gave everyone an excuse to enjoy a beautiful day in the heart of the city. Neither Callie nor Jude had ever gone to the celebration before so the other kids filled them in on how things normally went down on Pride weekend. They would drive to the police station and park in the parking lot there before walking to the parade route with Stef's co-workers.

The house had been a blur of activity most of the morning with everyone trying to get ready. Jude had been wearing his Born This Way tank top since he had woken at 6am and no one had said a word to him about it, mostly because the 12 year old hadn't actually said the "magic words". They had never had to make an actual rule about it before. Brandon and Jesus had been crazy about girls for as long as their mothers could remember and Mariana was in with being in love, but it ad always been with boys. Neither woman would care if any of their children one day came home with a partner of the same sex, but up until recently it didn't look like that was ever going to happen. Stef and Lena had an unspoken rule that the kids were never to be bombarded with questions regarding their sexual orientation, so until Jude said anything that confirmed or denied his orientation everyone was content to keep their thoughts to themselves.

Callie came into the kitchen where Jude was patiently waiting for everyone to be ready to leave and tapped her brother on the shoulder.

"Buddy if you are gonna wear that shirt, we need to lather you with some sunscreen before you leave the house." Callie grabbed a bottle of sunscreen and started rubbing over her brother's neck and shoulders in an effort to prevent a sunburn later in the day. Once he had successfully been covered in the lotion Stef had appeared in the kitchen, clearly ready to head out the door.

"Guys we're leaving in 10 minutes so Callie can you go get dressed?" Jude jumped down from his stool and practically ran over Stef to dash upstairs in front of his sister.

"I have to give you the shirt I got you." Callie followed him upstairs and waited in her room for Jude to give her the shirt. When he finally appeared in the doorway he had the shirt in his hands and he offered it to his sister. Callie wasn't paying attention to the shirt as she slipped it on over the camisole she was wearing and after grabbing her bag she turned back to her brother.

"Ready to go buddy?" Jude had an odd expression written on his face that Callie didn't understand.

"Are you ok with wearing that shirt?" Jude asked his sister and Callie realized that she had yet to actually read what the shirt had said before putting it on. She turned around to look at her reflection of the mirror and once she read the shirt she realized why it was so important to Jude that she be happy and ok with wearing it. The shirt was white, but bore rainbow lettering that read 'I love my gay brother'. Callie looked back to Jude who was standing in place like he was stuck there.

"Are you sure you are ready for me to wear this?" Jude said nothing, but he nodded. He wanted his sister to have the shirt and wear it. Callie dropped to her knees and hugged her brother tightly.

"You know I love you no matter what, right? This will never change how much I love you."

"I know." Jude smiled at his sister as she stood up.

"Jude, Callie, let's go." Stef yelled from downstairs and Jude quickly took off down the stairs and ran right past Stef and toward the car where the rest of the family was patently waiting. Callie descended the stairs slower that her brother and Stef stopped her at the bottom step and carefully read the shirt before looking up at Callie with a tearful look in her eye.

"This is the shirt he picked out for you to wear?"

Callie smiled and nodded, "he just gave it to me now, I had no idea this is what he had planned. I had no idea this is how he was going to go about doing it."

"Coming out on Pride…the kid has impeccable timing."

"No one is going to be weird about this right?"

"I would imagine that a family with two gay mothers would be pretty open minded about this Callie."

"No I know that. I just don't want him to think he's alone or feel out of place. This isn't really my area of expertise and I can't exactly give him first hand advice."

"We are about to go be around a few thousand gay people and people who like gay people Callie. He'll find out very quickly that he isn't alone. Besides, this is kind of my area of expertise." Stef winked at Callie and ushered her out the door and toward the car. When Callie climbed into the van the kids one by one read her shirt. Brandon hadn't paid close attention to the shirt when Jude bought it so he was just as surprised as everyone else. As Stef got behind the wheel she held her hand out to Lena who was in the middle of texting someone and was oblivious to what was happening in the car.

"Lena." Her wife finally looked up from her phone to see Stef's hand. "Look at the shirt that Jude gave Callie." Lena turned around to see Callie's shirt and with an amused look on her face she fished a 20 out of her pocket and handed it to Stef. Stef took the cash and turned around in her seat, handing it to Jude.

"Buy something cool at parade ok?" Jude took the money and smiled, still slightly unsure as to what had just happened.

"You guys were betting on him?" Callie asked.

"Lena was sure it would be closer to the holidays, I said it would Pride." Stef smiled into the rearview mirror. The kids all chatted happily as they drove to the station and parked in the employee parking lot. Once they got all their stuff out of the car they started walking toward the parade and festival route. Jude started to lag behind a bit and Lena told Callie to go on ahead and that she would check on him. When Lena meet up with Jude she walked side by side with him, content on waiting until he wanted to say what was bothering him. She didn't have to wait long.

"How come you aren't mad?"

"Mad about what honey?"

"About the shirt I gave Callie, about me liking boys."

"Why would we be mad about that sweetheart?" Jude sighed and kicked the ground in front of him as he walked, "other people get mad even before I ever said it out loud."

"People like your last foster dad?" Jude nodded and his head dropped a little lower. Lena knelt down to make eye contact with him.

"Honey, nobody in this family is going to be mad about this." Jude looked ahead to where Callie was waiting with everyone else. She looked up and smiled at him as if she was trying to make him feel better and Lena began to understand what he was actually afraid of.

"Last time…she let him hurt her and throw her in jail because of me, because he was gonna hurt me. I don't want her to hurt for me anymore." Lena was always moved by how much these 2 kids loved each other. Callie always acted like she would step in front of a moving train if it meant keeping Jude safe. She sometimes forgot that that deep seeded sense of love and loyalty went both ways and that Jude want to protect his big sister just as much.

"You and Callie have been through a lot together."

"You don't know the half of it. She keeps getting hurt to save me. I don't want her to hurt anymore." Lena's heart broke for the boy and wanted to put his mind at ease.

"Jude, listen to me. Callie is not going to get hurt over this or ever, not in our house. Ok. You and Callie are safe with us." Jude smiled and seemed to finally believe Lena's words. They rejoined the family and Jude immediately met up with Callie and attached himself to his sister's side for the remainder of the walk. Stef slipped her hand into Lena's as they walked side by side.

"Everything ok with him?"

"Never thought I would see the day when a 12 year old and a 16 year old are willing to sacrifice everything for each other."

"They've been though a lot."

"They've been through too much Stef."

"I know, but this is the one major life event that you and I are pretty well qualified to help him through. And besides you secretly always wanted one of the kids to be gay." Lena playfully pushed Stef's shoulder and laughed as they continued to walk towards the parade as a family.


	9. I Know What I Said

**Wow, you guys were so responsive to the last chapter so here is as fast of an update as I could muster. Hope it reads well.**

They spent most of the day at the parade; watching the floats roll by, watching the people march and mostly just enjoying their afternoon. Stef and Lena watched as Jude looked at everything with new eyes and his wide-eyed enthusiasm was a refreshing change of pace for the women who had been to Pride so many times before. Callie was dragged behind Jude everywhere he ran to and she didn't mind it, seeing her brother so happy was enough for Callie to just enjoy spending time with her baby brother. When things had started to die down Stef and Lena started to round up their children and herded them towards the car. Once they were back at the car Stef turned around to face her kids and address them.

"Ok, Jude gets to pick what we get for dinner."

"Why me?" The 12 year old was more than a little confused.

"Family rule little man. First timers at Pride get to pick dinner." Jesus explained.

"But it's Callie's first Pride too." Jude was still not understanding why he got to make the decision alone.

"I think they want you to pick because it's your first Pride and you came out today." Callie explained gently and finally Jude understood.

"Oh…can we go to that sandwich place on the pier?" Stef smiled and threw the car into gear, "you bet we can." They got their food and Jude asked if they could eat it on the beach and everyone agreed to the idea of a picnic so they grabbed towels from the car and set up their meal at the beach nearby. They ate their food and told stories of what they had seen that day and more to the point Jude never stopped talking about all the things he had seen and all the people he got to talk to. When the food was gone the twins started chasing each other around the beach and Brandon told Jude he would help him build a sandcastle before they had to head home. Callie remained sitting with Lena and Stef and was perfectly satisfied with watching her brother enjoy himself from behind her phone's camera lens.

"You should join them." Lena suggested.

"I will, I just like seeing him make new memories here."

"Has he always loved the beach?" Stef asked as she watched her son playing in the sand with the 12 year old in question. Callie smiled and nodded her head.

"Always. Growing up, we didn't have a lot of extra money for vacations and that kind of thing, but the beach is free. Our mom would pack us up and we'd spend the whole day at the beach. Our last trip to the beach is probably the only one he can remember clearly. She died about a week later." Callie looked down and let some sand run through her fingers before she moved to stand up.

"So he wanted to come here tonight…" Stef trailed off and Callie jumped in.

"To share it with her? Probably, though you'd have to ask him to be sure. We only go see her a handful of times a year and you've seen that does to him afterwards. Coming here is another way of being 'with" her without having to sit in a cemetery." Callie waved to Jude who was calling for his sister to join them.

"Look I know it's weird to say, but thank for today. Nobody ever made him feel special like this before, they just made him feel like he didn't belong. So supporting him coming out, making today all about him…it means more to him than you'll ever know. And it means just as much to me."

"It was our pleasure Callie." Lena assured the teenager. Just as Callie kicked off her sandals and was about to join her brother Stef stopped her.

"What did he end up buying with that 20 that Lena lost this morning?" Callie smiled and looked Stef square in the eye.

"We walked past this booth for a homeless shelter that focuses their work on LGBT youth. He asked me what it was that they did there and when I explained to him that they help people who got kicked out of their home for coming out he got this sad look on his face. He walked over to one of the volunteers who couldn't have been much older than me and handed him the 20. He told the guy that he knew what it was like to not have a family to love you and he didn't want someone else to know how that felt." Callie brushed tears out of her eyes and excused herself to go join her brother who was now running through the wet sand at the water's edge. In her absence, Callie left both women near tears.

"How anyone would ever not love that boy, I will never understand." Lena tried to push tears back as she took some pictures of Callie and Jude as they ran through the water.

"She always loved him." Stef pointed to Callie as she embraced her little brother despite the fact that they were standing in water that was knee high.

"And now he has us." Lena said quickly.

"They both do." Stef confirmed as she and Lena let the kids run around the beach a little longer. When the sun was all but gone the kids started to pack up their things and load the van to head home. On the way home the older kids decided to watch a movie when they got home and while normally Callie would have included Jude in her plans, her brother was practically asleep on her shoulder. Once they got back to the house Callie slowly guided Jude upstairs and handed him a pair of Pj's for him to change into before he fell completely asleep. When he emerged from the bathroom Callie was standing outside the door.

"Before I tuck you in go say goodnight to Stef and Lena, say thank you." The half awake boy padded over to the master bedroom and knocked on the shut door, only to be told that he could come in. Stef was sitting on the bed while Lena was still moving around the room getting ready for bed; they both stopped what they were doing when Jude came knocking.

"Everything alright sweets?" Stef asked from her place on the bed. Jude didn't answer her, but instead went over and hugged her tightly before kissing her lightly on the cheek and murmuring goodnight. He repeated the action with Lena before walking back toward the door, stopping for a brief moment.

"Thank you for taking Callie and I to the parade."

"You are very welcome sweetheart. Do you need us to tuck you in?"

"Callie's gonna do it, night." The 12 year old left the bedroom with the door slightly open, but closed enough for the two women inside to take amongst themselves.

"Well, this was definitely more fun than last year's Pride."

"You mean to tell me you didn't have fun cleaning puke off the staircase last year."

"Sorry to break your heart darling, but I will take five healthy children over two sick ones any day of the week."

"Agreed." Lena sat on the bed next to Stef and started to rub lotion on her arms as they kept talking. "You think he's alright, with everything that happened today?"

"It's a lot to take in all in one day, we know that, but he seems to have enjoyed himself and we'll be here to answer any questions he has. I mean, he's lucky enough to be in a house where it's not an issue and where he gets supported no matter what."

"I can't help but think about what would have happened if he did it in any of his other homes."

"Thinking about the what if's will keep you up at night Lena."

"I know, but…I mean Stef, you didn't see his face. He was terrified at the mere prospect of Callie getting hurt protecting him again. He didn't even care about his own happiness he was just so focused on saving her."

"Well, tell your brain to calm down because they are perfectly safe here with us, she isn't going to have to take a beating for him ever again." Stef got up to go get what she needed out of the bathroom and Lena kept talking.

"You do realize what you just said right?"

"I know what I said Lena."

"I was just making sure you heard yourself say it." Lena smiled at her wife and Stef rolled her eyes. She got caught admitting once again, that she wanted Callie and Jude to stay and be their kids officially. She didn't know how she was going to make it happen, but she knew she was willing to find a way. Before the conversation could continue both women heard music coming from down the hall. Stef opened the door and both women followed the sound to the boys' room to find Callie sitting on the end of Jude's bed with her guitar in her hands. Jude was barely awake and Callie played and sang softly in an effort to get him to finally give up and go to sleep.

**I always thought you were the best**

**I guess I always will.**

**I always felt that we were blessed, **

**And I feel that way, still.**

**Sometimes we took the hard road, **

**But we always saw it through.**

**If I had only one friend left, **

**I'd want it to be you.**

**Sometimes the world was on our side; **

**Sometimes it wasn't fair.**

**Sometimes it gave a helping hand; **

**Sometimes we didn't care.**

**'Cause when we were together, **

**It made the dream come true.**

**If I had only one friend left, **

**I'd want it to be you.**

**Someone who understands me, **

**And knows me inside out.**

**And helps keep me together, **

**And believes without a doubt, **

**That I could move a mountain:**

**Someone to tell it to.**

**If I had only one friend left, **

**I'd want it to be you.**

**'Cause when we were together, **

**It made the dream come true.**

**If I had only one friend left, **

**I'd want it to be you.**

**Someone who understands me, **

**And knows me inside out.**

**And helps keep me together, **

**And believes without a doubt, **

**That I could move a mountain:**

**Someone to tell it to.**

**If I had only one friend left, **

**I'd want it to be you.**

When the song was finished Callie played a few soft chords before standing up from the bed. She pulled the covers over Jude's shoulders and kissed his forehead before shutting off the lamp on the bedside table. Once outside the door she saw both women looking at her with smiles on both of their faces.

"I was just tucking him in. He's asleep, but if you want to kiss him goodnight he's out like a light so you won't wake him."

"No, he came and said goodnight before you tucked him in, we just heard your playing, thought we'd enjoy the free show." Stef smiled and Callie blushed at the compliment.

"Glad to see that Brandon isn't the only one who was born with some sort of musical talent."

"It's nothing that special, he always sleep better with noise. Mom used to sing to him and not matter how fussy he was being he would go right to sleep, it was like magic. Guess that trick still works." Callie held up the guitar to make her point before heading towards the stairs.

"I should head downstairs before they start the movie without me. Goodnight."

"Night." Both women responded as the teenager went downstairs, leaving them to return to their bedroom. As they got settled into bed Lena finally bit the bullet and asked the question.

"Did you ever picture us having five kids?"

"Nope."

"Now that we have five kids, can you see us ever going back to just three?"

"No."

"So when do we call Bill?"

"Once we figure out our finances." A silence fell over them as they laid perfectly still in the dark.

"You were right." Lena broke the silence.

"Course I was…but what was I right about this time."

"This Pride was way better than last year." Stef pulled Lena close towards her and kissed her forehead before settling both their bodies back into the pillows and slowly drifting to sleep.

**Ok, so that was a nice hopefully, positive chapter and you know what that means…I have to ruin it. I want to work in the stuff with Liam, but with my own interpretation of the stuff we didn't get to see. I'll probably lead into it in a way that is similar to the show, but then I'm going to change a few things for the sake of the flow of this story. Let me know what you all think.**


	10. You Matter

**Ok, so I picked up this chapter after Brandon picks Callie up from group, so he already knows what happened to her. Now, I've never experienced this type of sexual assault so this is my interpretation of how a teenager would handle it after keeping it a secret for years all the while trying to protect another child and keep them in a decent home situation. My point in saying all of this is that even the strongest person has a breaking point and I think we found Callie's. **

Once Brandon pulled into the driveway and killed the engine, the reality of what Callie had to do hit her. Telling Brandon was one thing, and even doing that was emotionally draining.

"I could circle the block again?" Brandon offered trying to give Callie whatever she needed.

"You circled the block 8 times already, it'll look like you're casing the neighborhood."

"8 more times won't hurt anyone." Callie stopped Brandon from starting the car again and instead she took off her seat belt and exited the car. They got to the front door and Callie took one more deep breath before pushing the door open and stepping inside. Callie could see Lena and Stef on the couch, enjoying each other's company and finally being able to relax after a long day and she felt terrible knowing that she was about to ruin that. As she ran through the guilt in her head, she finally registered that Lena was talking to her.

"Did you share?" Callie sat down and swallowed a deep breath, trying to steady her breathing.

"I did." Callie barely said it loud enough to be heard, but she said it.

Brandon turned to leave, "I'll let you guys talk."

"No, you can stay." Callie too one more deep breath, like it was her last one and she sat down on the chair opposite the couch. Stef sat up and Lena sat up a little straighter, sensing that whatever was about to be said, would require their full attention. "There is something that I need to tell you." One more deep breath was all Callie allowed herself before pushing forward.

"A little while ago we were living with another family. It was a pretty good situation and they had a boy, their biological son living with them. He was older, second year of college, but he lived at home to save money I think." Callie continued on, telling Stef and Lena the same story she had told the group a few hours earlier, though this time, just like then, she stopped before revealing the crucial detail.

"I didn't think much of it, you know. I mean he paid attention to me and it felt so good to have someone pay attention to me and love me that I just never even registered the thought of it being inappropriate for him to be interacting with me like that. I didn't think anything of it until this one night…" Callie paused, trying to keep her emotions in check. Brandon touched her shoulder in an effort to offer support, but she flinched her shoulder away from his touch. Stef had listened to the story up and to this point hoping that it wasn't going to end with Callie admitting that she had been raped, but the reaction Callie had to Brandon just then coupled with the story itself was enough to make her think that her worst fear was about to slap them all in the face.

"He wanted me to have sex with him. I said no, that I wasn't ready, that I didn't want to. He got really mad and he was always so much bigger than I was that I could have fought against him for hours and still lost." Callie was holding it together about as well as anyone could have expected, but tears were streaming down her face. Lena had by now grabbed hold of Stef's hand, desperate to find some kind of comfort in her wife, but she too had tears in her eyes that she was trying not to let fall. Stef had a firm grip on Lena's hand and a white-knuckle grip on the couch cushion, a grip that only got worse when Callie finally said it.

"He ra…he forced me to have sex with him." There it was. She said it and as much as Callie wished she could take it back and pretend it never happened, it was no longer her secret to keep. Once the words left her mouth Callie felt instantly sick and without another word on the matter she ran up the stairs and into the bathroom. Brandon was about to go after her, but his mother kept him from doing so.

"B, let me go after her."

"But…"

"No. Brandon, she knows in her head that you would never hurt her, but right now her head isn't in control right now and she's scared and traumatized. Even though you want to help her, right now seeing a man will not make her feel safe. Let me go help her, you stay here with Lena ok?" Brandon hated to admit it, but his mother was right. He let her take off up the stairs and he took a seat on the couch next to Lena. They sat in silence for a while and at one point Brandon let his mother rub his back in an effort to calm them both down. There were no words that could be said to each other that would make this better, so they sat in an almost reverent silence. Upstairs Stef could hear Callie throwing up in the bathroom and was glad to find the bathroom door closed, but not locked. She pushed her way inside and while Callie continued to throw up, Stef gathered her hair in a make shift ponytail and after removing the hair tie holding her own hair up she secured Callie's hair behind her. When Callie had nothing left to throw up she fell back against Stef and resumed crying. Unlike the other times when Callie was upset, this time Stef let Callie dictate how much physical contact she was comfortable with. When Callie grabbed at Stef like she was a life raft, the older woman took the hint and held Callie tightly to her like she had with Brandon when he was still a baby. She didn't realize that they had an audience until she heard Jude's voice from the doorway.

"Callie?" The 12 year old looked terrified and was clearly confused at the sight of his sister in near hysterics on the bathroom floor. Stef needed some help and she quickly shouted for Brandon to come upstairs. Her oldest son appeared in the doorway and quickly pulled Jude back and blocked his view of the bathroom.

"Hey buddy, how about we let mom take care of Callie and you come with me to my dad's place?"

"But Callie…"

"Mom is going to take really good care of Callie, I promise." Brandon grabbed Jude's hand and helped the boy gather some things to take over to Mike's. As the 12 year old got ready Brandon unplugged the video game that Jesus had been playing that had kept him oblivious to what was happening in his room.

"Dude, what they hell I almost had that guy? What's with the suitcase?"

"Grab your stuff, you and Jude are coming with me to my dad's."

"What? Why?"

"Look, just this once trust me and do what I am asking without putting up a fight. I need your help and moms need us out of the house." Jesus took one look at Jude who looked like he was about to lose it and suddenly Jesus figured out that whatever happened he didn't want to know what it was, but that Callie was involved somehow. Without another word on the matter he threw some clothes in a backpack and followed Brandon and Jude out of the bedroom and down the stairs. Lena saw the boys come down and Brandon pulled her into the kitchen.

"Mom has her hands full upstairs and Jude was about to get really upset so I'm taking him and Jesus with me to my dad's."

"Thank you. Call when you get there ok?" Brandon grabbed his keys and his bag and disappeared out the door with his brothers in toe. With Mariana at Lexi's the house was now silent. Back upstairs Stef had leaned against the tub with Callie still holding onto her with a vice grip. Lena would pass by the doorway to check on them, but mostly she just paced the hallway waiting for Stef to need any help. When Callie had seemed to calm down a little bit, Stef took a risk and spoke.

"Callie, how about we get you settled in our bed, ok?" Callie buried her face into Stef's shoulder, almost as if she was trying to say no.

"I'm not going to leave you Callie, I promise." After a moment passed Callie sat up enough that Stef could get to her feet and pull the teenager up with her. Stef led Callie into the master bedroom and let the teenager get settled onto the mattress before Stef got settled onto the other side of the bed. Callie laid down facing Stef and the blonde mirrored her position even though Callie was trying really hard not to make eye contact.

"Feel any better? I can get you some ginger ale if you want."

"No thanks." Callie's voice fell flat, Stef wasn't sure if she was just emotionally drained or if Callie was slipping into a dark place in her mind.

"Callie it took a tremendous amount of courage to tell us what happened to you. Most people your age don't have that kind of courage."

"Most people my age don't need that kind of courage." Callie buried her face into the pillow under her head and said something Stef didn't hear through the fabric.

"Honey you're gonna have to repeat that." Callie turned back to Stef and repeated herself. "I'm sorry." Stef's face fell and she brushed stray tears away form Callie's eyes.

"Oh my sweet girl, you have absolutely nothing to be sorry for." Callie turned away from Stef's touch. Even though it was gentle and caring, it was too much for her to handle at that moment. She wasn't used to having someone care for her like this and it was almost as if Stef's gentle behavior was too much for Callie to bear. Callie sat up slowly and wrapped her arms around her knees, trying as hard as she could to curl herself into a protective ball.

"Just please, if they take me away don't let them take Jude." Stef could see that Callie wasn't hearing anything she was saying and she couldn't blame her.

"Callie, listen to me. No one is going to take anyone out of this house." Callie wanted to believe her, but the foster system didn't exactly leave Callie feeling very hopeful that this one time would insure that justice got served. She ran through every scenario in her head, from the positive ones all the way through the most nightmarish likelihoods. The darker her fears became the more Callie started rocking back and forth in an effort to self-soothe. Stef watched her completely unsure how to help.

"Callie. Callie…please talk to me."

Callie crossed her arms in front of her chest and cried out, "it hurts."

"What hurts honey?"

"Everything." Callie's eyes darted around the room searching for something to make everything stop for a minute. Something to help her breathe. Her gaze finally fell on the en suite bathroom door. Stef turned around to see what Callie was so fixated on and when she saw what had caught Callie's attention she turned back to Callie in just enough time to see the teenager get to her feet and try to get into the bathroom. Stef was, to her credit, quicker than the teen and by the time Callie was almost to the bathroom Stef was blocking her way and Callie ran right into her.

"Please." Stef was a little surprised at the cry that came out of Callie. It was frantic and desperate and full of tears. Stef wrapped her arms around Callie as the teenager continued to fight against her with a renewed vigor. Stef could stay in that position for hours if she had too, but she needed some help.

"Lena, a little help please?" Lena appeared in the doorway and was completely shocked at the sight of her wife hold Callie back from getting into the bathroom. She didn't understand why until Stef nodded toward the bathroom and Lena looked inside. She didn't see anything out of the ordinary. The counter was still covered in bottles of soap, lotion, toothpaste and a few disposable razors. That's when it hit Lena. Callie was fighting against Stef because she saw what she wanted and Stef wouldn't let her have it. She grabbed the razors and the extras that they kept in the drawer and left the bathroom, quickly making her way downstairs. She didn't know off hand what to do with them so she grabbed the car keys and put them in the glove box of the van before she went back into the house. When she went back into her bedroom Callie was still begging Stef to let her go. Even with the razors gone Callie was still in a highly emotionally state and nothing Stef did seemed to make it any better. Lena had never seen her wife look more lost, but to her credit she kept trying. Finally Stef pulled away from Callie just enough to look the teenager in the eye.

"I'm not letting you go, ok. I'm not going to let you go. I know that every other family you got placed with has let you go. I know they looked the other way, hurt you, let you get hurt and let you hurt yourself without ever stepping in and helping you, but you don't live in those houses in more, ok. You live in my house and you can fight against me all day and all night, but I am not going to let you go hurt yourself. I can't begin to imagine the hell that this is causing you, but I am begging you to let us help." Callie looked shocked, like she had never heard someone say any of those words before and Stef had a feeling that she was the first person to do so and mean them.

"Not worth it." Was all that Callie could choke out and Stef shook her head.

"Yes you are. Maybe no one has ever told you this, but you need to hear it. You are absolutely worth fighting for. You matter Callie." Callie stopped breathing for a second and in the same moment began crying even harder, because Stef was right. No one had ever told her that before. She knew that Jude loved her, but to have someone, anyone other than her baby brother tell her that she mattered was something that Callie had never had the chance to experience prior to this moment. With a fresh batch of tears spilling over, Callie went back to letting Stef comfort her. Stef could no longer tell if Callie was crying because of what she had confessed to them that night or if she was crying because she wanted to cut or crying because somebody finally cared about her enough to stay when she tried to push them away. Whatever the reason, Stef didn't question it, she let Callie cry into her tshirt to the point that a good section of the fabric was soaking wet with tears. She eventually settled with her back against the pillows and Callie was curled up at her side, flat out refusing to let go. Lena left the room for a moment to call Brandon and check on the rest of their children. She locked up downstairs and when everything was done she returned to her bedroom to find Stef running her hand up and down Callie's back. Stef mouthed that Callie was asleep and Lena nodded her head. She got ready for bed herself and hesitated for a moment before climbing into her bed.

"You aren't going to wake her up babe, she's out." Lena climbed into bed and watched as Stef continued to rub Callie's back as the teenager slept.

"We're going to have to talk about this Stef."

"I know, but she was in no shape to do it tonight. When she wakes up we can take it from there."

"We're going to have to call Bill, especially if there is another child living in that house now."

"We'll take to Callie first, then call Bill." Stef pulled a cover over Callie and watched as the teenager snuggled into her body more. "We can't let them take her out of this house Lena."

"I know." Lena shut off the light, casting the room into complete darkness. Lena moved closer to Stef and wrapped her arm around Callie, eventually resting her hand on Stef's waist. It had been years since any of the kids sought comfort by sleeping in their mothers' bed, but tonight Lena was positive that she and Stef need the comfort this closeness provided as much as Callie did, if not more so.

**So, I kept the beginning as close to the show as I could and then I did what I wanted with it from there. I used to be a cutter so I used experiences that I had for that part of the chapter, but my experience isn't everyone's so I apologize if you lived a different situation than the one I depicted here. Anyway, the whole Liam thing has started and before you worry too much, I'm not letting ANYTHING break up this family, but that doesn't mean that people aren't going to try. So be warned: it's going to get worse before it gets better.**


	11. Into The Fire

The next morning Stef woke up expecting to still see Callie sandwiched in between herself and Lena, but when she sat up in bed she found only Lena, who was still sleeping. Stef tried to keep her cool as she got up out of bed and walked out of her bedroom. She kept replaying the events of the night prior over and over in her brain and she knew that those razors weren't the only sharp instruments in the house and she had no idea how long Callie had been awake in the house all alone. She shut the door of her bedroom quietly and just before she was about to check Callie's room, something caught Stef's attention downstairs. She walked downstairs to see Callie in the living room, guitar in hand, strumming away and singing softly as she played.

**It's hard to listen to a hard hard heart**

**Beating close to mine**

**Pounding up against the stone and steel**

**Walls that I won't climb**

**Sometimes a hurt is so deep deep deep**

**You think that you're gonna drown**

**Sometimes all I can do is weep weep weep**

**With all this rain falling down**

**Strange how hard it rains now**

**Rows and rows of big dark clouds**

**When I'm holding on underneath this shroud**

**Rain **

**Its hard to know when to give up the fight**

**Two things you want will just never be right**

**Its never rained like it has to night before**

**Now I don't wanna beg you baby**

**For something maybe you could never give**

**I'm not looking for the rest of your life**

**I just want another chance to live**

**Strange how hard it rains now**

**Rows and rows of big dark clouds**

**When I'm holding on underneath this shroud**

**Rain **

**Strange how hard it rains now**

**Rows and rows of big dark clouds**

**When I'm holding on underneath this shroud**

**Rain **

**Strange how hard it rains now**

**Rows and rows of big dark clouds**

**When I'm still alive underneath this shroud**

**Rain Rain Rain**

"Ok, well now you're just showing off." Stef smiled from her place in the door way and Callie finally looked up, finally seeing that once again, she was being watched.

"I'm hardly good enough to be showing off." Callie blushed and put the guitar down. Stef took a seat on the couch next to Callie.

"You are being far too modest, that was lovely." The silence that fell over the room was awkward and Callie just wanted it to be over so she unwillingly started the conversation that she knew was coming.

"I know what you have to do. I know you have to report it." Stef took a deep breath before she spoke.

"You told us that one of the only reasons who told us what happened was because there is another girl in that house and if that is the case, we have to get her out of it, that means reporting it."

"Does there have to be a police report?"

"Technically Lena has to report what she knows to the police because she's a teacher, for that matter I have to report it because I'm a police officer, but in order for it to be more than a file in a drawer somewhere there has to be a complaining witness. The statute of limitations on rape is 5 years Callie. You could…"

"I could what, press charges for a rape that happened two years ago. There isn't any physical evidence from what he did. No one would believe me."

"I believe you Callie."

"Great one person in a sea of a hundred people who won't see me as anything more than the fucked up foster kid that probably was asking for it."

"Callie, no one ever asks to be raped, you have to believe that or this whole process will just destroy you."

"After last night, I think you and I can agree that it already is destroying me. You saw what I was willing to do to feel better, to feel in control again."

"But you didn't."

"Because you stopped me."

"Would you have done it if I hadn't stood in your way?" Stef confronted Callie with the question she feared getting the answer to. Callie said nothing and only nodded her head.

"I want to hear you saw it Callie. Would you have cut yourself?" Callie winced when Stef said cut, but she made eye contact with the older woman and in a shaky voice she said yes.

"I'm sorry."

"I asked you a question and you answered with the truth, nothing to be sorry for."

"You have enough to deal with without me adding my problems to the mix."

"You're my child, your problems are my problems." Stef said it without thinking and Callie felt like she got hit in the stomach. It had been years since she had last been anyone's child and it was a foreign feeling that she realized she missed more than she could put into words.

"We can talk more about the cutting later and we will need to, but right now we need to talk about Liam so that Lena and I can call Bill and I can call Mike to start paperwork." Callie nodded her head and took a shaky breath.

"I need to tell Jude."

"Brandon is taking care of him at Mike's."

"He deserves to know, he was there too."

"Does he know what happened?"

"He knows that he came home one night and I was acting different and I told him very basic information. That Liam had hurt me, but I refused to explain what rape was to a 10 year old."

"Lena or I could explain what happened to him." Stef offered, trying to help Callie understand she was there to help.

"No. He has to hear it from me. You can tell the twins however you wish, but Jude has to hear it from me, please."

"Of course. I'll go call Brandon and tell them to bring the boys home." Stef left the room and made the call to Brandon. When she returned Lena was in the living room and she and Callie were deep in discussion.

"Brandon is bringing the boys home now." Callie nodded her head, but said nothing.

"Callie and I were just going over what I needed to talk to Bill about when I call and unless there is anything else, I can go call him now." Callie shook her head and Lena got up from her seat, giving Callie a quick kiss on the head as she walked into the kitchen to make her phone call. Callie shut her eyes and her body just went rigid.

"Callie, it's going to be ok."

"No, it's not. This is why I kept it a secret for two years. I would have been perfectly happy taking this one to my grave, but no, I just had to meet the new foster girl in their house. Now, if I want to save her, I have to risk everything I have. They could literally rip me out of this house, they could separate me and Jude, they could label me a risk and I would spend the next two years of my life in some half way house….all because I wasn't strong enough to fight off a 19 year old. This isn't ok, I'm not sue what it is, but it sure as hell isn't ok." Callie was mad and Stef could see the terror in her face.

"Callie. I know it's not easy to believe me, but you are not in this alone. Ok? You have a family now, and we don't abandon family, ever. And if they think they are going to take you out of this house, they can rip you and Jude from my cold dead body, because Lena and I are not backing down without a fight and neither should you."

"He deserves a family, he needs to feel safe."

"Callie, Jude is not the only one who deserves a family to feel safe with. Don't push us away, because like it or not, we aren't going anywhere." Lena called both of them into the kitchen and with one more deep breath Callie followed Stef into kitchen.

"Out of the frying pan and into the fire." Callie spoke to herself as she crossed the threshold into the kitchen and took the phone from Lena.


	12. Package Deal

**THAT EPISODE! I just can't. That whole scene with Callie in the court room …give the girl an Emmy, everyone else go home, because that scene was flawless. Honestly everything except that kiss was flawless. But damn damn damn it, why that ending. I have a lot of feelings so my deepest apologies if this reads a little rough.**

Bill ended up having to come over to the house to talk to Callie. That whole conversation took about an hour and Callie hoped that as Bill left the house that she had done the right thing by saying anything at all. Brandon had the most unfortunate timing ever, and pulled up to the house just as Bill was leaving. Jude saw his social worker and of course feared the very worst for his sister and without waiting for Brandon to stop the car he jumped out and ran towards the house.

"Callie! Callie!" Jude burst through the front door literally screaming his sister's name and when Callie finally appeared from the kitchen, with Lena and Stef behind her the 12 year old ran into his sister's arms like he hadn't seen her in years. The boy was bordering on hysterics and Callie grabbed him by the hand and guided him into the backyard. Stef followed, leaving Lena to check on Brandon and Jesus while she stood a few feet away from Callie and Jude, watching closely as Callie tried to soothe Jude's fears.

"Why was Bill here?"

"Bill was here because I told Stef and Lena about what happened with Liam."

"You told them that he hurt you?" Callie took a deep breath and wished she had had more time to prepare for this moment, but she had to tell Jude what really happened because things were going to get very messy, very fast.

"We need to talk about that. Jude, what Liam did, he did hurt me, but it was a very specific thing he did."

"I don't understand, you always said he just hurt you." Callie nodded her head.

"You're right I did always say that, but I never told you how he hurt me and I need to. You've learned about sex in school right?" The 12 year old blushed and Callie felt bad, this was awkward on several levels and she wasn't even at the hard part yet.

"Ok, so normally, sex is a good thing when both people want it and are respectful of each other. But sometimes, one person forces another person to have sex with them. They hurt them, or over power them and even if the other person says no they do it anyway. When that happens, it's not sex anymore ok, it's…it's rape." Callie hated the word as it fell from her lips, but it had to be said. Jude's faces went pale almost immediately. He wasn't a stupid kid, he knew what his sister was trying to say.

"He did that to you?" Callie nodded her head, "he did." Jude looked a little lost, like he was completely unsure as to what he could do or say to make this situation better for his sister. He looked over to Stef and without saying anything else to Callie he went over to Stef and with a brave face he looked up at his foster mother and asked.

"Are you sending her away?"

"What, no. Honey no one is being sent away from this house. We're gonna help Callie all we can I promise." Jude eyed Stef cautiously before returning to Callie and wrapping his arms around his sister.

"I'm sorry he hurt you." Callie kissed her brother's head and knelt down in front of him, making eye contact with the boy.

"Don't be sorry. He can't hurt me, or you, anymore."

"Is he gonna get in trouble?"

"We have to talk about it with a lawyer, see what we can do in a trial. It happened a long time ago so I can't prove that I am telling the truth."

"So he might get away with it."

"Yes."

"Why?" Stef took a step towards them, but Callie waved her off, she wanted to do this alone.

"Because they will take one look at my file and they'll decide I'm not worth the time and the effort it would take for this trial to go through. They would spin it to look like someone with my past could be lying so why ruin a man's life for the poster child of screw-ups."

"You aren't a screw up." Jude had tears in his eyes and Callie felt terrible for putting them there.

"On paper, I look like a mess Jude. That stint in Juvie will follow me until I turn 18."

"You went there to protect me."

"I know buddy…"

"This isn't fair. He hurt you, he deserves to get punished."

"He does, but I have to make peace with the fact that he might get away with it." Jude pulled away from Callie and continued to cry angry tears. He marched back over to Stef and dragged her over to Calle.

"You're a cop, can't you do something. Can't you shoot him?" Stef was more than a little surprised about this coming out of Jude mouth, but he was angry, and shocked and he wanted justice for a crime that would likely see none.

"Honey I can't do that…."

"Why not? Laws are supposed to protect people right? She got hurt and those laws can't do anything to punish the bad guy. It's not fair! Help her!" If Callie had known Jude would react this strongly she never would have said a word to him on the matter. Stef was going to try to calm the boy down, but Callie once again beat her to it. She wrapped her arms around her brother. She plopped down on the grass and Jude fell into her lap and continued to cry. Cry for his sister, cry for what happened to her and cry for the justice he feared his sister would never see. Callie didn't rock him like she had the times before. She sat perfectly still and let Jude cry. Stef wanted to intervene and say something, she wanted to wrap both kids in a hug and make it better. But this wasn't a scrapped knee, this was something Stef couldn't fix and she shared Jude's frustration, they all did, but watching the scene in her backyard unfold made her stomach sink. If they won any trial, it wasn't going to come easy.

Callie sang softly just loud enough to be heard by Stef and by her brother who was safety nestled in her arms. Stef stood and watched and listened as Callie tried desperately to calm her brother's fear and anger.

**Hold on steady and strong,**

**Here's the dawn coming on won't be long,**

**Then the sun will come shining through,**

**To show me the place I once knew.**

**Fare thee well,**

**Fare thee well and adieu,**

**Fare thee well,**

**With this song I'll be gone,**

**Fare thee well.**

**The old man's here and he's fine,**

**He has come here from years down the line,**

**He has come to bring peace to all times for the few,**

**He has come to bring life to the new.**

**Fare thee well,**

**Fare thee well and adieu,**

**Fare thee well,**

**With this song I'll be gone,**

**Fare thee well.**

**Fare thee well,**

**Fare thee well and adieu,**

**Fare thee well,**

**With this song I'll be gone,**

**Fare thee well.**

**Hold on steady and strong,**

**Here's the dawn coming on won't be long,**

**Oh its easy to stand in the light with pain,**

**In the light I will ever remain.**

**Fare thee well,**

**Fare thee well and adieu,**

**Fare thee well,**

**With this song I'll be gone,**

**Fare thee well.**

**Fare thee well,**

**Fare thee well and adieu,**

**Fare thee well,**

**With this song I'll be gone,**

**Fare thee well.**

Callie stopped singing and Jude sat up, brushing tears from his eyes. Callie put all her weight on her knees and she made direct eye contact with Jude once again.

"We aren't giving up, ok. I'm not giving up on this, not without a fight ok."

"What if they take us away from them?"

"You listen to me very carefully. You're place his here with them and I will give up everything that I ever thought meant anything to me to make sure you get to stay."

"We're supposed to be a package deal."

"We'll always be a package deal buddy, always. I'm not gonna let him win, not now, not ever."

"What if you lose?" Callie stood up, took Jude by the hand and led the boy into the house with a very simple reply.

"Then I lose knowing I told the truth."

**Ok, so I might start the trial next chapter or I might do one more small chapter. Let me know what you all think. Also, I've had several people want to see how Stef and Lena would handle Callie actually cutting herself and I can absolutely work that in with relative ease, but I want to get a feel for how many people want to see how that would play out.**


	13. Nobody Fucks With Family

**Wow, so I never thought this story would blow up like this and yet here we are, well past 100 reviews and it's only chapter 13. I'm blown away by everyone kindness and so I thought I would give you one more short chapter that has the beginning of the trial in it. I need to update my other stories and now that I am all settled into the new apartment I can focus on doing just that. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy.**

Because of the nature of the case, the trial was set for the following week, but as Stef explained to Callie and indeed all her children, the case would not be heard by a grand jury. It was a matter that everyone decided had to be dealt with within the family court system, so the judge in the case would literally be filling the role of judge and jury. The whole family was overwhelmingly supportive of Callie during the week leading up to the trial date. Mariana had convinced Callie that if she was going to go down, she might as well go down in a blaze of glory and by that she meant a power suit. She took Callie to the mall and helped Callie put together an outfit that left no room for misunderstanding: this girl was in it to win it. Jude stuck especially close to Callie that week and no one said anything about it. They knew better than to try to separate the siblings during such a tumultuous time. Brandon did whatever he could to help Callie and sometimes that meant giving her space, while other times it meant playing music with her to distract her from what could possibly be coming down the pike. Jesus was supportive, but the teenager was filled with blind rage over the fact that this case would never get much attention outside of that courtroom. Not that he wanted Callie to be paraded around and questioned, but he wanted to know that even if they lost, the world would never forget Liam's name and the fact that it was attached to a rape case of a 15 year old girl. He didn't know how, but he knew that if he thought outside the box he might be able to insure Callie's story got heard.

The day before the trial was tense in the Foster household to say the very least. Callie didn't say two words to anyone the entire day and for that matter, neither did Jude. Everyone tried to pretend like it was business as usual, but it was harder than they thought. To Mike's credit he swung by the house that morning and grabbed Brandon, Jesus and with some gentle pushing, Jude and took them to run an errand. Stef and Lena tried to talk to Callie, but all they got was a lot of blank stares and silent nodding in return. Callie eventually found herself sitting alone in the backyard; no guitar, no music, nothing. Stef watched her sit perfectly still for almost an hour and then as if someone had slapped her awake Callie jumped to her feet and entered the house. She grabbed Brandon's laptop and placed it on the dinning room table. Stef watched as the teenager wordlessly grabbed a few books from the shelves in the living room and added them to her pile of tools on the table. Stef didn't know what Callie could possibly want with those legal books that Stef only had for work purposes. The Fosters had a lawyer for Callie, the legal part of this trial was not her's to handle and yet in that moment Stef hadn't the heart to remind the teenager of that. They ate dinner in absolute silence and all the while Callie kept looking back at the books on the dinning room table as if she was sure they held the answer to her problems. After the dishes were put away the twins turned in early and Brandon offered to help Jude lay out his clothes for the following morning. Lena and Stef watched from the kitchen as Callie wrote at a feverish pace.

"Should we stop her?" Lena questioned and Stef shook her head.

"As if we could. If this is what she needs to do to feel ready for tomorrow then I say let her be. We'll tell her to get some sleep and she'll nod in our direction and go right back to researching and writing."

"Think she found something useful?"

"God I hope so. I read that book cover to cover the other day and I didn't find anything, but if that book has the answer, she'll find it." Stef finished her drink and helped Lena lock up downstairs.

"Callie." The teenager looked up at the two women as they went upstairs.

"Try and get some rest ok." Callie nodded her head and like Stef said she would, she returned to her book. Hours later, the house was completely silent. Everyone was asleep, everyone but Callie that is. The dinning room table was, by then, covered in papers and open books and Callie had yet to stop working. Sometime around midnight Jude had woken up and joined her. He sat in the chair next to her and watched as his sister poured over pages of small text, only to write something down in her notebook. He fell back asleep sitting in that chair and sometime around 3am Callie had passed out with her head resting on the table in front of her. And that is the scene Stef came upon at 6am when she woke up and went downstairs. Stef looked at Callie who was clutching her notebook in her hand like it held the Holy Grail of legal advice and in her heart Stef hoped the girl had found something that she had missed. Stef woke Jude up and told him that he could shower in their master bathroom as soon as Lena was out. With Jude gone Stef tapped the top of Callie's outstretched hand, careful to stay far enough away from any wild swing that would come from the teenager being woken up suddenly.

"Morning sweets, if you eat fast you can have first crack at showers." Callie rubbed the sleep from her eyes and yawned.

"Not hungry."

"I don't remember asking if you were hungry. Breakfast in ten and then go get ready ok?"

"Ok." Callie knew better than to argue about something like eating when Stef was only looking out for her. She stood up from the table and cracked her back as she did so. Stef rubbed her back lightly and gestured to her mess of a table.

"Well, did you find what you were looking for?"

"God I hope so." Callie already sounded defeated and Stef stopped her from leaving the room.

"Hey. Don't give up before the fight starts ok. You have something he doesn't have. You have the truth and you have us. Fosters never give up without a fight and we sure as hell don't give up before one starts."

"I'm not a Foster." Callie tried to look away from Stef, but the Blonde made her look her in the eye. "Yes you are." Callie nodded her head in understanding and followed Stef into the kitchen. She forced herself to eat toast and some juice before she ran upstairs to shower and change. The other kids woke up and one by one ate and got dressed. When Mariana finished getting ready she looked at Callie who was staring at her suit like it was going to bit her.

"You can do this."

"I waited for years to have a moment to tell my side of what happen and now it's here and I've never been more scared. Everything I lived through and this scares me. Dumb right?"

"No, it's not dumb. But you should know, this time, it's not just you and Jude fighting to survive. Like it or not, you have a family now. We've got your back, win or lose." Callie smiled as Mariana left the room and she quickly set about getting dressed. Once dressed, she looked at herself in the mirror and a small smile crept on her face. Two years of waiting and Callie was finally going to get her day in court. She grabbed her bag and shoved her notebook inside of it and made her way downstairs. When she looked up Callie was positive that she felt the air knocked out her lungs. Stef and Lena were wearing professional clothes and Mariana was wearing a dress, but it was the boys appearance that had caused tears to form in Callie's eyes. When Mike had taken the boys out the day before he was taking them to pick up their suits. All three of the boys were wearing matching suits and ties, even her brother. The 12 year old went up to his sister and beamed.

"I clean up pretty good huh?" Callie tried to talk, but she knew if she did she would cry. Jude grabbed his sister's hand and smiled.

"They don't to call us screw ups anymore." Callie would have held it together if Jude hadn't said that, but the tears rolled down her cheeks as she kissed her brother's forehead.

"No, no they never get to call us anything like that ever again."

"Mike got us the suits, he said it would show a united front." Callie looked up at Mike who was standing off to the side and who was wearing a suit himself. Callie didn't know Mike very well and certainly didn't ever peg him as a man to do something like this for a girl he hardly knew. She went over to where Mike stood and without saying a word she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. Mike wasn't expecting the hug, but he was more than glad to return it. Callie pulled away and smiled through her tears.

"Thank you, you didn't have to do that."

"I wish I could do more than buy them suits."

"It's more than any other man has ever done for him or for me, so I mean it, thank you." Mike smiled and Stef could see unshed tears in her ex-husband's eyes. They all started to pile into the cars; Brandon rode with Mike and the twins in one car, while Callie and Jude rode with Lena and Stef in the van. The ride to the courthouse was silent until Callie started seeing signs for the courthouse entrance coming up. She leaned over to her brother and spoke in a docile tone.

"Remember what I said last night?"

"We only have two options." Jude replied nodding.

"That's right. We either win with the truth, or…"

"We lose with dignity." Jude finished for his sister and both Stef and Lena were fighting back tears in the front seat. As Stef turned the corner for the courthouse she saw a sight she wasn't expecting to see; a media circus on the front steps of the courthouse. Stef had to flash her badge to drive through the police barricade and she realized that the only way in at this point was through the front door.

"What in the hell? Where did all these people come from?" At that moment as Stef tried to figure out how this happened Callie's phone received a text message and when she looked she was surprised to see a message from Jesus. Callie smiled and after reading the message herself she handed the phone to Lena who read it out loud.

"I may not be any help to you on the legal front, but no one fucks with family." Lena shock her head in shock: Jesus found a way to almost insure that win or lose, Liam wouldn't have much of a future, at least not one that anyone would be proud of. Another officer stopped Stef from driving forward anymore and Stef turned around to Callie.

"I'm so sorry honey, but it's too late to go in the back way." Stef strapped her badge to her pants and got out of the driver's seat. She had officers surrounding her, keeping the press back, but getting to the back door of the car was an ordeal. She and Lena helped Callie out of the car and the cameras went off like mad. News reporters shouting questions, calling out her name and Callie only snapped out of her shock when she realized that Jude was still in the car. She grabbed her brother's hand and threw her blazer over his head, completely blocking his face from the view of any camera in the area. With Stef in front and Lena following behind them, they finally fought their way inside the courthouse. Callie put her jacket back on and when they met up with the rest of the family she looked at Jesus who had a wide grin across his face.

"How?" Jesus shrugged and held out his phone to her.

"You'd be surprised how easy it is to get the medias attention once something starts trending on twitter." Callie was in awe, all that fuss outside was sparked by a twitter campaign that gained national attention in less than a week.

"I told you, nobody fucks with family." Jesus followed his sister and Brandon inside the courtroom to find their seats and with a genuine smile Callie followed, this time with a renewed sense of hope.

**Ok so that ended up being WAY longer than I meant it to be, but I hope you enjoyed it. Let me know what you thought.**


	14. Trial

The courtroom was small because it was family court, they usually don't need a large amount of seats for those proceedings, but this case was different. The nature of the case meant that the judge would not allow any media inside the courthouse, but the room was cramped all the same. Callie sat in the seat next to her attorney and the rest of the family sat in the first row of seats behind the partition that separated the room. Stef and Lena sat side by side with Jude sitting just to the left of Lena. When Liam was led in Callie was certain her heart dropped into her stomach. She looked back to Jude only to see him move closer to Lena who had no problem wrapping her free arm around the boy. Lena offered Callie a reassuring smile. There was little that Lena could actually do to help at this point, but the one thing could do was give Callie the peace of mind of knowing that Jude was being cared for during the trial.

The courtroom stood up as the judge entered and everyone took their seats quickly as the judge explained how the trial would go. For the most part everything was the same, except no opening or closing statements and with no jury, a decision could take anywhere from a few minutes or a few days after the end of the trial. Also, once Liam's fate was decided the judge would rule on Callie and Jude and if they would be staying with the Fosters. With all the rules in place the lawyers were told to call their witnesses, which was the beginning of a very long day for Callie as she was the only name on both sides of the trial. Liam and his lawyer had decided that he would not be taken the stand in his own defense. Stef reminded Lena that no attorney in his right mind would put a guilty man on the stand and let him perjure himself. So even thought this case was a matter of he said/she said, Liam would not being saying much of anything. Her own lawyer got to go first and when Callie reached the bench she was sworn in and once she took a seat her lawyer started in with the questions.

"Callie, how old were you when the incidence in question occurred?"

"I had just turned 15."

"Just turned 15?"

"Yes."

"And how old was Mr. Olmstead at the time?"

Callie swallowed hard, "he was 19."

"Before the night in question, how would you classify your relationship with Mr. Olmstead?" Callie repeated what she had said to her support group and to Lena and Stef, about Liam treating her special, showering her with attention and affection to the point where it became odd.

"Now you claim that at one point that relationship became sexual?"

"Yes." Callie spit out the word like it was poison and when she looked up her entire family from Stef to the twins had the same expression on their face: a mix of anger and the greatest amount of sympathy.

"Can you tell the court what happened?" Callie knew this question as coming and she took a deep breath in an effort to steady her breathing. She looked to Jude and wished that he didn't have to hear the details. Almost as if he had read her mind, Brandon pulled out his iPod and a pair of headphones from his bag. He secured the noise canceling headphones over Jude's ears and pressed play on a playlist of music Brandon had to learn for his piano teacher. Callie mouthed thank you to Brandon before beginning her account of what happened that night. Stef and Lena had heard the story before, but it never got any easier sharing the details of what happened to Callie that night. When Callie was done she brushed away tears and focused on her lawyer again.

"And how did you come to leave the Olmstead's home?"

"They caught Liam trying to kiss me once and he blamed it on me, said that I came onto him. We were gone an hour later."

"Your brother lived with you in the house as well yes?"

"Yes, but I never told him about the rape, I just said that Liam had hurt me."

"Do you think Mr. Olmstead ever harmed your brother?"

"No, I always made sure Jude was safe."

"Even though it meant your own safety?"

"Even then. His safety always comes before mine. Always has, always will."

"Why wait so long to come forward?"

"Their new foster daughter was in my support group. I couldn't live with myself knowing that I let what happened to me, happen to another girl. One is already too many."

"Thank you Callie. Your honor I reserve the right to redirect."

"Noted. Defense, your witness." Callie's lawyer sat down and Liam's lawyer stood up and Callie already felt uneasy about this part.

"Ms. Jacob, may I call you Callie?"

"No." Callie was not going to give this attorney any help.

"What would you prefer I call you?" The lawyer was a little surprised at the bite in Callie's voice.

"You seem to know my last name, no reason to use anything other than that."

"Very well. Ms. Jacob, two years is an awful long time to wait to report a rape." Callie was silent so the lawyer pushed.

"Ms. Jacob?"

"I'm waiting for you to ask a question. That was a statement." Stef smiled and stifled a laugh, but her pride was beaming through. Callie wasn't going down without a fight of some kind and this attorney just stepped into the ring with a very determined 16 year old.

"Why wait almost two full years to claim that my client raped you?"

"The foster girl who had a juvie record is less likely to be believed in this situation. Plus, he made it very clear that he would come after me if I told."

"You spent time in juvie recently correct?"

"Yes."

"What were the charges against you?"

"My foster father at the time was beating my brother and I stopped him."

"So, you're violent?"

"That's not what I said. I wasn't going to stand around and let my baby brother get killed."

"You could have called the police."

"Tried that, they ignored it because he was able to talk his way out of being charged with anything."

"You have an answer for everything Ms. Jacob."

"Isn't that the point of a question Mr. Donaldson?" The seasoned attorney looked mad, but moved forward.

"You seem to have an answer for everything so maybe you can enlighten me on what happened in October 12th, 2011?" Stef saw the blood leave Callie's face and she knew that whatever happened that night was about to become a problem within this case.

"I was in the hospital." Stef and Lena shared a look and knew in an instant where this was going.

"Why were you there?"

"I don't have to tell you that." Callie answered with confidence.

"You're right, you don't because I have your medical file right here." The lawyer held up the file and Callie's eyes went wide and her lawyer almost knocked over his chair standing up.

"Objection. Your honor, that is the medical file of a minor, Mr. Donaldson has no right to its contents."

"Your honor, the Olmsteads were in charge of the Jacob siblings and as such had complete access to all medical records."

"That doesn't mean they can use them now." The judge banged his gravel and silenced the fighting men.

"That is enough. Mr. Donaldson, find a new way to make your point that file is off limits and will be surrendered immediately to Ms. Jacobs current foster parents." Stef stood up from her seat and plucked the file from the lawyer's hands and returned to her seat. Callie nodded her head toward the file, silently telling Stef that she should see what they were talking about and Stef poured over the large file of hospital stays and broken bones to find the date in question. The lawyer continued while Stef read.

"Ms. Jacob, you are asking an awful lot of this court to believe you. Two years means no physical evidence and your record is less than spotless and a man's life is at stake here."

"I'm aware at the circumstances of this trial Mr. Donaldson, I'm 16 not stupid."

"Then why should this court believe the word of a delinquent teenager with a past of mental health issues over the word of my client?"

"Your honor, the defense is using information you already said was off limits." Callie's lawyer was mad and Callie didn't know how to respond.

"Your honor, my client knew Ms. Jacob well enough to know these things and he shared that information with me."

"That's a lie." Callie wasn't going to stay quiet and be paraded around like the new monkey at the zoo. "I never told him a thing about my past."

"Really? So you never told him about trying to kill yourself when you were 14?" Callie's face hardened and her lawyer was once again on his feet.

"Your Honor…" The judge beat him to it.

"Mr. Donaldson, I warned you twice and you did it anyway, this line of questioning is not allowed. Either move on or sit down."

"Your honor may I say something?" Callie finally spoke, but looked like she was about to be sick.

"As it appears Mr. Donaldson is done, yes you may."

"It shouldn't matter if I tried to myself one time of a thousand times he had no right to rape me. Our neighbor has a dog Mr. Donaldson and the dog understands the word no, I think we should expect a young man of 19 to know what it means as well, don't you? My life has been troubled, I don't deny that, but I never deserved what happened to me that night, no one does. Believe me or don't, but I get to go home tonight knowing that I told the truth. Whether you and this court choses to believe it is on you, not me." Callie stopped talking and the defense attorney looked a little ashamed, but said nothing.

"Any further questions for this witness?" The room was silent. "Then we will reconvene tomorrow morning to go over the affidavits that I have before I make my ruling. Court dismissed." Callie stood up from her seat and walked past her lawyer and her family, leaving the room just as fast as she could. Stef ran after her and found her in the hallways off to the side of the courtroom. Callie was leaning on the windowsill and Stef cautiously approached her. Stef placed her hand on Callie's shoulder and instead of flinching away Callie turned around and immediately hugged Stef tightly to her body.

"I know baby, I know." Stef stroked Callie's hair and whens he looked up she could see Lena laying into their attorney and the kids all stood off to the side. All except for Jude who was walking toward her now. The 12 year old joined in on the hug and once again, Stef found herself holding onto two crying children and she still had no clue how to soothe the ache she knew they both had in their hearts. When Callie had calmed down some she pulled away and brushed some tears away from her face.

"I'm sorry." Stef shook her head.

"No, you have nothing to be sorry for; what he did was low. We are so very proud of you for what you did up there today. I know it was hard to repeat what happened, but you got up there and told the truth Callie. That took guts."

"I want to go home." Stef nodded and took Jude by the hand and wrapped her arm around Callie. Once she met up with the rest of the family they made there way toward the door of the courthouse. Callie refused to go the back way, maintaining that she would not be bullied or shamed into hiding. When the doors swung open the cameras went off and the questions were coming at Callie rapid fire and she would have ignored them if not for one question.

"How does it feel to be the poster child of the foster care system?" Callie stopped, turned around and all but shoved Jude into Stef's arms.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, let me be very clear about this: I do not, nor have I ever had any interest in being the poster child for anything, but now that I have your attention I will say this. My story got heard because of a campaign on social media. My story got heard in a courtroom. My story got heard. And for every one story that gets heard, there are thousands of stories that go untold. Children who suffer in silence because they think they don't deserve better. Win or lose, today my story got heard. I am one of the lucky ones. You want to know how to improve the foster care system, here is my advice. Stop treating children like they are nothing more than their file. My file tells you that I went to juvie, but it fails to mention that I did so to keep my brother safe. My file told the defense that it was ok for his client to rape me. I don't know how, but this system needs a swift kick in the pants because what I learned in that courtroom today is that I don't matter because I'm a foster kid and that needs to change." Callie walked of with her family trailing behind her and they piled into their cars and settled in for a awkwardly silent car ride home.

**Ok, so I have some ideas about the whole Callie cutting again thing, but I want some suggestions. Do you want to see Stef/Lena catch her doing it or do you want them to find out about it after the fact? The next chapter is going to be the trial conclusion because it was fast in the show and I want to keep it moving, but I will also touch on the whole, will they get to stay with the fosters for good thing in the next chapter as well.**


	15. Just Like You

**Ok, so I got a really great responses from everyone after asking what you all wanted to see with Callie and the cutting. I wasn't expecting such a variety of answers and you all certainly gave me a lot to think about. Some people wanted Lena to find Callie cutting instead of Stef, others wanted it the other way around and a few people wanted both. One thing that seemed to be a universal request was that they catch her doing it. I agreed with you all on that, so as for who finds her, it was a really hard decision and one that took some time to work out, but hopefully you'll like how I did it. I was a cutter for a long time, from the age of 13 until I was about 18 and those five years gave me a lot to draw on for chapters like this, but of course, my experience is not universal so bear with me on the details because I am taking them from things that happened when I got caught.**

**This chapter might be triggering so please read it with caution.**

Once they got home Callie was the first one out of the car and she disappeared into the house with Jude following close behind her. Brandon and the twins walked into the house and all made excuses that they had things to do in their rooms. Stef and Lena didn't try and stop any of them because she knew that this was a hard day for the adults and they couldn't imagine how hard it was for their teenagers.

"Should we go talk to them?" Lena asked as they settled into the kitchen.

"I think we should give them a few minutes alone first. They heard a lot of horrible stuff today and they know that someone they love is hurting, they're just trying to make sense of it all."

"Well shouldn't we be up there trying to help them figure it out?"

"Yes, and we will, but they deserve 15 minutes to themselves before we go in, don't you think?" Lena nodded her head and pointed outside to where Callie sat on the patio with Jude.

"We probably shouldn't leave them alone for 15 minutes, but what the hell are we going to say to them Stef?" Stef shut her eyes and realized that for the first time in years, she and Lena were in way over their heads.

"We're going to need a extra set of hands." Stef held her phone out to her wife with her contact list already open. "Your mother or mine?" Lena said nothing in response, but she took the phone from Stef and left the kitchen to make a phone call. When Lena returned she handed the phone back to Stef, "your mother will be here in 20 minutes, she's going to pick up some stuff for dinner on her way." They decided that 20 minutes would be just long enough to give the kids time to calm down before they tried to talk to them. In the mean time Lena sat outside with Callie and Jude, not saying anything, but making sure that someone was there for them. Roughly half an hour later the doorbell rang and Stef answered it, knowing it was her mother. As she stepped into the house Stef grabbed the bags she had in her hands that were filled with groceries.

"Hi mom."

"Hello sweetheart, I didn't know what the kids were up to eating so I grabbed a bunch of things they can pick and choose." Stef followed her mother into the kitchen and put the food away.

"I don't think anyone really has much of an appetite after today, but maybe they'll eat something later." Sharon looked outside to see Lena keeping an eye on Callie and Jude who seemed pretty wrapped up in each other as they sat side by side on the porch. Jude leaned against his sister's shoulder and Callie held her brother's hand tightly in hers and the two of them sat perfectly still.

"I take it that things didn't go well this morning." Stef shook her head and let out a heavy sigh.

"She did wonderfully. She got up there and told the truth, even though it was hard and she didn't let the defense attorney jerk her around. But he had something up his sleeve that really caught us off guard and because he didn't play by the rules I have a distraught 16 year old and a heart broken 12 year old in my backyard."

"That bad?" Stef reached into Lena's bag and pulled out the file, handing it over to her mother as she spoke.

"They had her medical file and they tried using against her."

"I thought that was illegal."

"It is, she's a minor and a ward of the state. Lena and I should be the only ones with that file and believe me, we didn't have it until today, but they kept it all these years and they used it to get under her skin and I'm afraid it worked." Sharon looked at her daughter with a very quizzical look on her face and Stef pointed to the file.

"Page 16 at the bottom of the page." When Sharon looked down she saw what Stef meant and she felt an overwhelming amount of heartache for a girl she assumed would be her granddaughter soon.

"What can I do to help?"

"Lena and I need to talk to the kids, but we can't leave Callie and Jude alone. So maybe you could either help us with the other kids or you could keep an eye on the two of them while we give it a go." Sharon handed the file back to her daughter and moved toward the backyard.

"I'll try my luck with Callie and Jude, you and Lena can go talk to the other kids as a group." Sharon went outside and touched Lena's shoulder.

"I'll stay with them. You and Stef go handle the other kids." Lena quickly stood up and took one more look at Callie and Jude before heading inside to her wife. Sharon walked over to where the kids were and sat down. They had met her once before about a month prior, but they were still getting used to meeting the extended family members so Sharon knew to tread lightly.

"Hope you guys don't mind me joining you out here, when the weather is this nice it's almost a crime to stay inside." Callie looked up and forced a smile before looking away again.

"You know I brought a bunch of groceries with me and I could really use some help making desert for tonight, any chance I could get one of you to be my helper?" Jude picked his head up off Callie's shoulder like he immediately wanted to say yes, but he quickly looked to his sister, almost as if he was asking if she'd be ok if he went inside.

"Go on baby, but wash your hands before you help." Jude took off toward the house, leaving Callie with Stef's mother.

"So they called in the cavalry?" Callie commented as she looked over to Sharon.

"I guess you could say that. Personally, I think my daughter wanted someone else to cook dinner so I got called." Callie smiled, but did say anything.

"So I heard you handed the defense attorney his ass during cross."

"More like he handed me mine."

"That's not how I heard it."

"Stef clearly didn't watch the part where they made me sound like a crazy girl who shouldn't be believed under the very best of circumstances."

"Oh honey, you aren't crazy and you certainly shouldn't believe anything that the defense can come up with."

"I doesn't much matter what I believe, the judge is the one they have to convince."

"Honey, you did everything you could today. You got up there, told the truth and saw first hand that some lawyers are jerks. Everything else is out of your hands."

"Things don't usually go my way when other people are in control of my fate."

"But this time you aren't alone and from what I hear, even if that man gets away with hurting you, his life is ruined thanks to social media." Callie smiled at that.

"Jesus paid a guy at school 50 bucks to make an account on twitter that was untraceable. The news caught wind of the story and this kind of scandal in a system that everyone knows has problems was a news story waiting to happen."

"Then trust me honey, this case will follow him the rest of his life, so win or lose, you can be sure he'll never have the ability to hold his head up ever again." Sharon stood up and held out her hand for Callie to take.

"Want to come help us bake some cookies for desert?"

"Thanks, I'm ok out here."

"No you aren't and cutting yourself off from your family isn't going to make you feel any better." Sharon shook her head as Callie seemed happy to stay seated where she was. The older woman knelt down and put her hands on each of Callie's knees, forcing the teen to look at her.

"I know that you are afraid that the judge is going to take you away from this house, but you have to have some faith in my daughter and Lena."

"My track record suggests that I shouldn't get my hopes up about anything."

"Alright, I swear if I didn't know better I'd say that Stef gave birth to you because you are just as stubborn as she was growing up." Callie smiled, she liked the idea that someone thought she was enough like her foster mother to think they were biological family.

"Listen honey, it's never a mistake to hope for something good to happen."

"Even if it won't come true?"

"Oh honey, it's times like that when you have to hope the hardest. Hoping and dreaming for impossible things are how miracles happen."

"People like me don't get miracles."

"Honey, look around you." Callie looked around the backyard and then back at Sharon, not understanding what the big deal was.

"You have lived through the most unimaginable hell, things adults can't fathom and yet here you are, alive. You buried your mother and stepped into that roll for a little boy who thinks the sun sets on your shoulders. You refused to be silenced by a rapist and are making sure he can't hurt anyone else, ever again. You found a family in a really unlikely place, but here you are. You think people like you don't get miracles? Honey look in a mirror, because people like you are the miracle." Callie suddenly understood where Stef got some of her fighting spirit from and she sat there after listening to Sharon, trying hard to blink back tears. Sharon once again held out her hand for the teenager to take.

"Can I have a few minutes to try and look like I haven't been crying?"

"Of course. You know where we'll be when you're ready." Sharon went into the kitchen to find Jude patently waiting and her daughter impatiently waiting. Stef pulled her mother aside so that they were out of ear shot of Jude.

"Did she say anything to you?"

"Stef she's known me for about a day all total, she's more likely to talk to you than to me."

"What did she say to you?" Stef knew something had been said and she wanted to know what.

"She's worried she's gonna lose and borderline terrified that the judge will take her away from here."

"What did you say to her?"

"I told her she was exactly like you."

"Mom."

"Don't you mom me, it's true. She is just as stubborn as you ever were and continue to be, but she'd jump in front of a moving train to save her family."

"You think she'll be ok?"

"For now. She'll come in when she's calmed down and you can go from there." Sharon left the conversation with Stef and started getting Jude set up to help her cook. Callie did eventually join them in the kitchen and helped her brother roll out some of the cookie dough. The other members of the family drifted in and out of the kitchen, helping with dinner or with the baking before going back to whatever it was they were doing. At one point Callie was sitting with Jude in the living room flipping through TV channels, waiting for dinner to start. Jude leaned over and gave his sister a hug with no explanation as to why.

"What was that for buddy?"

"I'm sorry." Jude answered in a really sad voice.

"What could you have to be sorry for baby?"

"He hurt you." Callie swallowed hard and tried to keep a level head.

"You don't have to apologize for him Jude, what happened wasn't your fault and it wasn't mine. Liam is the only person who needs to feel bad about what he did to me ok?"

"I heard some of what you said today in court, about what happened."

"I thought you had that music on."

"I did, but I heard bits and pieces." Callie felt guiltier in that moment than ever before.

"I'm sorry you had to hear any of it Jude."

"I'm sorry you had to live through it alone. You could have told me."

"No, I couldn't have. I didn't want you to have the image in your head or feel like you had to protect me."

"I would have you know."

"Would have what?"

"I would have protected you." Callie would have said something, but at that moment Lena came in to tell them that dinner was ready. Jude walked ahead and Callie followed close behind, walking into the kitchen in an almost dazed state. She said nothing during dinner and even though everyone else was talking, they all noticed her silence. Lena and Stef kept sharing looks of concern across the table, but there was almost nothing that could be done with all the kids sitting at the dinner table. When the food was done Callie asked if she could be excused to go lie down before desert.

"Sure sweets, just keep the door open so we can holler upstairs when the cookies are done ok?" Stef didn't want to come right out and say, keep the door open so we know you aren't hurting yourself, but Callie wasn't dumb and could see what was really being said. She agreed and went upstairs by herself. About 15 minutes later Stef sent Jude upstairs to get his sister and tell her to come back downstairs. The young boy left the room and when he returned Callie wasn't with him and he looked scared. Stef pulled him aside and asked where Callie was.

"She taking a shower." That was the response that she got from the 12 year old.

"Ok, I'll go tell her to hop out, ok?" Stef started to walk away, but Jude stopped her.

"The door is locked." Stef turned around to face Jude with a stricken look on her face.

"What do you mean the door is locked?"

"I tried to open it, but it was locked. I can hear her playing music from her phone and I can hear her moving around in the shower, but she didn't answer me when I called her name."

"Ok, why don't you go help my mom with those cookies and let me go get Callie?" Jude didn't want to agree, but he did as he was asked and returned to the kitchen while Stef went upstairs. Jude was right, the door was locked and so Stef took a shot in the dark and knocked.

"Callie? Honey can you come down and join us please?" She was met with silence. Well, not complete silence, she could hear the music Jude was talking about and when she listened carefully she was almost certain she could hear crying.

"Callie? Honey I need you to open the door." Stef didn't wait around long before running downstairs and into the garage. When she emerged from the garage holding a screwdriver and a hammer Lena was standing at the base of the stairs with a confused look on her face.

"Keep everyone downstairs."

"Stef…" Lena called out for her wife, but she was already upstairs. Stef didn't care in that moment how much noise she was going to make, that door was going to open one way or another. She used the screwdriver as a chisel and the hammer as some leverage to get the hinge of the door to come off. She did this for both hinges and quickly plucked the door out of its spot and leaned it against the wall in the hallway, dropping the tools at her feet. Stef stepped into the bathroom calling Callie's name.

"Callie, honey I'm going to open the shower curtain ok?" In that moment Stef didn't care about seeing Callie naked, she was more concerned with what she feared she would find when she peeled the curtain back. With a quick flick of her wrist the curtain was pulled away and she could see Callie curled up in a ball in the tub, in a near catatonic state. Stef was relieved when she saw that if nothing else, Callie was alive, but that relief was soon gone when Stef saw that the water running down the drain was stained red. When Stef looked closer, Callie was clutching and x-acto knife in her right hand. Stef knelt down near the tub and tried to get Callie to focus on her.

"Callie. Callie, look at me please." Callie kept her eyes looking straight ahead, but when Stef reached for the knife Callie turned her body away from her foster mother. When she moved Stef got a look at the new cuts that covered Callie's left forearm and they were bad enough to force Stef to throw caution to the wind…she was getting that knife out of Callie's hand one way or another. Stef reached for it again, but this time when Callie moved away Stef was one step ahead of her and hand her hand wrapped around Callie's right wrist before she could pull away anymore.

"Please." Callie finally made eye contact with Stef and all she could say was please. Stef never thought a 16 year old could have such a death grip, but she was literally fighting Callie for control over the knife. In that struggle, the showerhead was spraying Stef, but she couldn't have cared less. Callie started crying harder and when she did her grip was compromised and Stef was finally able to pull the knife away and without much thought she tossed it to the other side of the bathroom. Callie moved to stand up, but Stef stood up with her and in one quick motion wrapped a nearby towel around Callie and held her tightly against her own body. By know Stef was standing in the tub and was drenched in water, but she had other things on her mind. Callie was in near hysterics, fighting to get to the knife, while at the same time, wanting desperately to let Stef hold her and help her. Stef thought she could handle this on her own, but she needed help and fast so she decided her mother could come up with an excuse to keep the kids downstairs because she needed her wife with her.

"Lena!" Stef yelled and seconds later she heard the footsteps up the stairs and soon Lena was standing in the bathroom waiting to see what Stef needed help with first.

"Grab the knife off the floor and get it out of here." Lena grabbed the knife and disappeared for a brief period of time, only to return with a handful of towels. Lena shut off the shower and offered Callie a dry towel to wrap herself in. When Callie reluctantly took the towel Lena saw the same cuts Stef had seen moments before and she couldn't help the tears that formed in her eyes. She handed Stef a small hand towel, which she promptly wrapped around Callie's arm in an effort to still the bleeding. Lena held the towel in place while Stef stepped out of the tub, grabbing a towel for herself even though it was pretty pointless as she her clothes were completely soaked through.

"I'm going to take her into her bedroom and get her changed into something, you go change and we'll meet in our bedroom." Stef nodded at Lena's suggestion and when they left the bathroom Lena followed Callie into her shared room with Mariana and Stef stood in the hallway alone.

"I take it something bad happened?" Stef looked up at her mother who was standing in the hall with a worried look on her face.

"I should have kept her downstairs." Stef wasn't sure the last time she went crying to her mother for anything, but this was a unique situation and she had no idea how to handle one of her children hurting so much that a knife looks inviting.

"Honey, you are a wonderful mother, but you cannot see everything coming. Don't beat yourself up over this. Go change your clothes and you and Lena and Callie can work this out together, I'll keep the kids occupied." It wasn't a perfect solution, but Stef needed to hear it from somebody before she found the ability to move into her bedroom and put on dry clothes. When she came out of her bathroom Callie was sitting on the bed with Lena and Lena was trying to clean the cuts before they got infected. Stef handed her wife an ace bandage to keep the bandages in place and as Lena wrapped Callie's arm, Stef sat on the other side of the them and waited.

"I didn't work." Callie muttered.

"What didn't work sweets?" Stef ran her fingers through Callie's hair as she spoke.

"The cutting…it didn't help this time." Callie started crying again and as she did, she tried desperately to hide her face in her hands. Lena pulled Callie's hands away form her face and made Callie look at her.

"You don't have to hide from us, ok. We are not going to hurt you. This was scary for all of us and we clearly need to get you some help, but you don't have to handle this on your own."

"I'm so sorry." Callie repeated her apology over and over again and finally Stef took a chance and asked the difficult question.

"Callie, did what happened today make you want to hurt yourself?"

"He heard some of my testimony."

"Who did sweets?"

"Jude." Stef understood why Callie was so distraught, but she didn't have much time to say anything before Callie kept going.

"He's just a kid, I didn't want to know any of that stuff, or hear that it happened to me and now he thinks he could have protected me. I couldn't breathe and I needed everything to stop, just for a second."

"Callie. Listen to me. Jude loves you, its pretty natural for him to want to protect you like you've done for him."

"He's just a kid."

"Callie, honey, you're a kid too." Callie looked a little shocked when Stef pointed that out, like it had been years since anyone noticed that she wasn't an adult dealing with adult problems she was a child dealing with adult problems.

"I'm so tired." Callie said, or rather cried out and Stef was certain both her and Lena's heart broke a little bit when they heard it. Callie wasn't saying she was tired as in she was sleepy, she was tired of fighting, tired of being strong and neither woman could fault her for that. Callie stayed nestled in Lena's arms as Stef brushed tears out of her eyes.

"I know you're tired and you know what, maybe it's time you let someone else take care of you."

"But…"

"No, no buts. It's not you and Jude against the world anymore, ok? You have us."

"What if I lose you?" Stef was angry at so many things in that moment and she wanted more than anything for Callie just to hear her. She took Callie's face in her own hands and got within inches of the teenagers face.

"Ok, listen to me very carefully. I don't care what the judge says, you will never stop being my child, our child. They could send you to the other side of this country and you would never stop being a member of this family. I know you're scared, hell, I'm fucking terrified because I can't make this better right this minute, but it's not always going to be like this Callie. And once this trial is over, you and me and Lena are going to figure out the best way to help you through all this, ok?" Lena had never seen Stef get that worked up over anything before, but then again none of their children had ever experienced this level of pain before. Callie nodded her head that she understood and Stef forced a smile through her tears.

"That's my girl." Stef left Callie with Lena while she went to go put the door back together, only to find it already back on the hinges. She peaked her head into Jude and Jesus' room and found all three of her sons sitting on one bed.

"Is Callie ok?" Jude looked more concerned then he ever had before and Stef smiled and nodded.

"She'll be fine sweetheart. You can go see her real quick if you want, but be gentle ok." Jude got up and ran towards the master bedroom and Stef turned toward her remaining sons.

"Thank you for fixing the door."

"Thank grandma and Mariana for cleaning up all the water, the door was easy in comparison." Brandon pointed out that clearly this was a group effort and Stef nodded.

"Get some sleep guys, big day tomorrow." Brandon followed his mother out and said goodnight before going into his room. Mariana was in her room, on the phone with Lexi and Jesus was getting ready for bed in his room. Stef looked into her own bedroom and saw that Callie was no longer wrapped up in Lena's arms, but instead Jude was holding tight to his sister while Lena watched them from her side of the bed. Stef climbed into the small space left on her side of the bed and curled herself around her children. Jude turned around for a moment and snuggled into Stef.

"Thank you." Stef kissed the top of the boy's head.

"You are most welcome sweetheart. Goodnight Jude." The boy yawned and settled between his sister and Stef.

"Night mom." Stef's eyes shot open and so did Lena's. They locked eyes with each other and sighed. Stef had stopped being a woman who prayed years before, but in that moment she prayed that the second half of the trail would go their way and that Jude and Callie would get to stay with them because she knew one thing for certain. These kids already lost one mother; they couldn't stand losing two more.

**Wow, ok, that was intense to write. Hopefully everyone is ok. I hope you like how I did it and like I said I took a lot of this from things that happened to me. Although my dad didn't take the door off the hinges, but he did pick the lock of my bedroom door to get to me. I liked the idea of throwing Sharon in there because, well Annie Potts was flawless as Stef's mother. Let me know what you think and the next chapter will be the conclusion of the rape trial and the start of the custody hearing.**


	16. My Dignity

**You guys are sending me an embarrassment of riches with these reviews. I keep saying that it's going to take longer to update, but all your reviews make me want to update right away. I have training for my internship this coming week so the updates might actually take some time, so just stick with me. Everyone seemed to really respond well to the last chapter and how I handled Callie and the cutting. Some people shared personal stories and I'm so glad the chapter touched so many people in that way. This chapter is going to be the conclusion of the Liam half of the trial, then I'll do a chapter of the family dealing with the custody part of the trial so keep an eye out for that.**

The next morning Stef woke up when the weight on the bed shifted towards her side, meaning that Lena was awake. When she opened her eyes, Stef had to stifle a laugh because both Callie and Jude were still fast asleep and one of Jude legs had ended up slung over Stef's legs, while his outstretched arms fell awkwardly onto his sleeping sister. Stef remembered when Brandon would sneak into her bed and she would always wake up in a similar position or she would get woken up when his foot would twitch and end up kicking her in the stomach. Stef carefully got out of bed and even though the movement was slight it was enough to make Callie's instincts kick in. Stef watched with fascination as the sleeping teenager reached over and pulled her brother closer to her, neither one of them waking up in the process. Lena came up behind her wife and handed her a mug of coffee.

"I'm not sure if I should be touched that she instinctively protects him or angry that it was ever necessary for her to hold onto him that tightly while they slept." Stef took a swig of her coffee and Lena shook her head.

"Nothing that happened to them is fair Stef."

"Then I say they are over due for something to go their way. I'm going to change and make something for breakfast."

"Too late, your mom already has food going."

"She stayed here last night?"

"You expected her to go home?'

"Where did she sleep?"

"Mariana gave her bed up for your mom and then Mariana slept in Callie's." Stef was thankful that her mother stayed because good or bad, this day was going to take its toll on everyone. Making her way downstairs, Stef could smell the food her mother was cooking and when she walked into the kitchen she saw the food all laid out on the counter.

"If you want to come cook like this for us every morning you can have my job as head chef." Sharon swatted Stef's hand away from the bacon plate.

"Leave some for your children." Stef stole a piece anyway and went to go pour more coffee.

"How's Callie this morning?" Stef sighed into her mug and looked back at her mother.

"She actually slept through the night. Though that could be attributed to the blood loss more than anything else." Sharon looked back at Stef with wide eyes.

"That bad?"

Stef nodded her head, "yeah mom, that bad. X-acto knifes are designed to cut paper and help cut through awkward surfaces for art projects, imagine the damage that can be done with one on someone's skin."

"I had no idea it was that serious."

"Neither did we." Stef finished her coffee and rinsed out her mug.

"What are you going to do about it this morning?" Stef opened her mouth to answer, but was interrupted.

"Take off the bandages from last night, clean the wounds, disinfect the wounds, let them breath for a few minutes, pat them dry, cover the whole arm in some kind of ointment and then re-bandage the arm using gauze and an ace bandage. I'll have to wear a long sleeve shirt, but other than that no real inconvenience." Callie walked through the kitchen, talking as she went and poured herself some of the coffee. Sharon felt bad for talking about the teen behind her back and she tried to apologize.

"Callie, I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to be nosey, it's none of my business."

"Please don't apologize for caring about me and it's kind of your business, I mean hell if they win the custody case, you're going to be losing another 20 bucks at major holidays." Stef was dumbfounded. Callie was cracking jokes about how her mother would have to give out extra money at Christmas time like she did for all the grandchildren. Sharon smiled and corrected Callie.

"40 bucks. Each grandchild get a 20 from me and usually if I twist my ex-husband's arm you get a 20 from his as well."

"Generous. Now I can't wait for Christmas. I'm going to go wake Jude up and make sure he showers." Callie chugged the rest of her coffee and left the room. Stef turned to her mother with a bemused look on her face.

"What was that?"

"That was a teenager who is on an adrenaline high from last night, but who might just be starting to believe that she could get everything she ever wanted, like a family to spend Christmas with."

"I'm sure they've had Christmas in their other homes before mom." Sharon shook her head and pointed to the file Stef had handed her the day before.

"That file you got yesterday has a whole lot more than just her medical stuff. It has all her paperwork from the former foster homes, including the dates they got there and the date they left. Those kids haven't spent Christmas with anyone other than each other since the Christmas before their mother passed." Stef grabbed the file like she couldn't believe what her mother was saying. She had skipped so many pages that day in court to find out what the attorney was referring to that it never occurred to her to go back and read the rest of it. As she scanned the paperwork her heart sank: her mother was right. Callie and Jude had spent every holiday season since their mother's death with only each other as company.

"Oh my god." Stef turned back to her mother like she wanted her to fix this and Sharon couldn't help but smile at her grown daughter looking so very lost.

"Honey, relax, you have five shopping month left until December. Lots of time to make it a Christmas to remember."

"But mom…"

"No buts, Stefanie. Eat something and go get dressed, I'm sure she'll need some help with those bandages." Stef obediently grabbed a bagel and another thing of bacon before heading upstairs. Brandon was in his room getting dressed. Mariana was trying to put on make up using the mirror in the hallway, which meant Jude was in the bathroom showering. Jesus was fighting a losing battle with his tie and Lena was in the master bathroom getting dressed. Stef found Callie sitting on her own bed as she carefully tried to peal off the bandages from last night.

"Want some help?" Callie looked surprised for a moment and then shook her head.

"They look like hell the next morning, you shouldn't have to see the mess underneath this bandage." Stef finished half of her bagel and sat down opposite Callie on the bed.

"Well, I saw them last night when they were still bleeding and if I survived that I can handle this ok?" Callie felt guilty, but nodded her head. Stef took Callie's arm and laid it across her lap, carefully taking the tape off the bandage that was holding everything in place. As Stef worked to remove the bandage she saw Callie looking at her arm with a little too much interest.

"You sounded like you used to doing this yourself." Callie looked up and nodded her head.

"Not something I ever let anyone else see me do before."

"You never got caught doing it in any other home?"

"Jude and I blended in with the furniture. I could have held a gun to my head in the middle of dinner and they wouldn't have noticed or cared." Stef stopped her movements at the gun comment and Callie beat herself up for phrasing the sentence like that.

"I didn't mean it like that. I'm not going to try and hurt myself with your gun, or any gun…or at all. I just…it came out really wrong."

"It's ok, I know what you meant, but you'll understand that I'm going to change the code on my gun safe anyway right?"

"Right." Stef peeled back the ace bandage and both women could see that the blood had soaked through the gauze underneath.

"Let me do this part." Stef pulled her hands away, nervous that she might hurt Callie if she didn't back off. Callie took a deep breath and held it as she slowly peeled back the bandage that was now caked in dried blood. Stef held out a plastic bag for Callie to throw the bandage away in and once it was gone Stef went to go grab a wet washcloth from the master bathroom. When she returned Callie was inspecting the cuts closely.

"They aren't that bad." Was all Callie said and she took the warm washcloth from Stef and carefully washed the cuts. Stef watched as Callie's face contorted as the cloth rubbed against angry and raw flesh. When it was finished Stef took the cloth away and returned with a towel and the rest of the things they needed to finish fixing Callie's arm. Like she had explained before, Callie gently dried each cut before putting some of the disinfecting ointment on her arm. Stef noticed that Callie was far too good at doing this. She clinched her teeth tightly as she rubbed the ointment in, but let out a relieved sighed when it was done. They put the bandages on and secured the ace bandage back into place.

"All done." Stef gathered up all the supplies and moved to leave the room.

"Stef…thank you, for helping me." Stef nodded her head and smiled.

"What kind of mother would I be if I didn't help my child when they were hurt?" Stef awkwardly cleared her throat and pointed to Callie's closet.

"You should get dressed and come eat something before we have to leave." Callie nodded and moved toward her closet to get dressed. Stef went into her own bedroom and stood before her closet trying to make a decision. If the media was at the courthouse again today, an added show of force would be needed to get her family in the building. With that in mind, Stef grabbed her uniform and put it on like she was headed for work instead of the courthouse. Once downstairs all her family turned to look at her.

"Any reason you aren't just wearing a regular pants suit dear?" Sharon looked at her daughter and asked what everyone else was thinking.

"Well, yesterday it was hard to get in the front door. If we want to get inside the courthouse, we'll need me to be as professional as possible."

"You just want to scare a few people." Lena pointed out and she gathered up her purse.

"I'd settle for scaring one person." Stef responded as she glanced at the clock.

"Alright everyone, we gotta go. Same cars as yesterday, but mom, you can ride with us, Callie and Jude in our car." Everyone gathered up their things and piled into the appropriate car. Sure enough, when they pulled into the courthouse area the media was once again surrounding the building. Stef got out of her car and went around to the passenger side door to help Lena out. Sharon got Jude out the other side of the car and Callie got out of the other door on her own. Again, Stef led the way into the courthouse, with Lena's arm linked with her own. Sharon had Jude in one hand and Callie in the other as they pushed through the hoard of media reporters. Once inside the courtroom, everyone took the same seats as the day prior and Callie was sure that she was ten times more nervous this time than she was the day before. There would be no more testimony; today was all about a decision being made. Before they called the courtroom to order, Callie turned around and leaned over to give her baby brother a kiss on his cheek.

"Remember what I said." Jude nodded his head and as much as he understood what it meant to lose with dignity, he really wanted his big sister to win. The judge came in and as everyone sat back down the judge looked over the papers in front of him as he spoke.

"This case has been largely, an issue of he said/she said and those kinds of cases are always difficult. They become more difficult when it's a question of a child who got victimized and a man who faces years in prison. Under normal circumstances, I have to throw cases like this one out." Callie's heart skipped a beat and she swallowed hard, trying hard to show a stoic face to the whole room. In that moment though, she was sure that she was about to hear the words she had feared hearing since the trial began.

"But something came to my attention very early this morning." Callie looked back to Stef who was just as confused as Callie; no one had any idea where this was going.

"People who are on trial for things often turn to friends or family with the stress of the situation. It appears that Mr. Olmstead doesn't have much of either because I have in front of me a signed affidavit from the bartender at a local bar. Any idea why I would have this Mr. Olmstead?" Callie never saw Liam looked scared ever, but in that moment all the color drained from his face.

"Let me help you Mr. Olmstead. Last night, you walked into this man's bar and drank roughly 30 dollars in liquor. Now usually I would ignore this based on the fact that you were drinking, but according to this man you started spill your guts the second you sat down, long before your first drink was poured. You told this man and a few others around you that you were about to get away with rape."

"Your honor, my client…"

"Sit down Mr. Donaldson, it is my turn to talk." The attorney sat down looking just as defeated as Liam.

"Funny thing about the world we live in Mr. Olmstead: technology can be your best friend or your worst enemy." At that moment the bailiff rolled in a small TV and handed the judge the remote. When the judge pressed play you could see the video was taken from a camera phone, but the quality was good enough to see Liam talking loudly about how he was about to get away with what he had done to Callie.

"_No one is ever going to believe that bitch. I mean come on, who is that judge gonna believe, some stupid orphan who can't keep her mouth shut, or a college educated man who has a bright future ahead of him. Funny thing is, I remember what happened like it was yesterday…" _Callie didn't like where this was going and when she turned around she locked eyes with Lena who was sitting closest to Jude. She motioned for her foster mother to cover Jude's ears and Lena quickly did exactly that.

"_She kept screaming no, but I did it anyway. I mean I knew she really wanted it, so who cares. Not like anyone believes her."_ The judge paused the tape and looked right at Liam.

"You made a widely stupid decision Mr. Olmstead. You counted your chickens before they hatched and thanks to the media attention on this case we got a hold of this very interesting confession early this morning." Callie looked back at Jesus who looked so proud that his plan had actually paid of significantly for Callie.

"After looking at this evidence and hearing all the testimony in this case, I have come to a decision. The defendant will rise." Liam stood up slowly a faced the judge.

"Liam Olmstead, in regards to the charge of felony rape, this court finds you guilty of the aforementioned crime." Callie heard the sighs of relief from behind her and heard the crying as well, but it took a minute before Callie could really believe it. She had won. Tears freely flowed down Callie cheeks at that point and Callie didn't even have the chance to turn around to face her family before Jude had hoped over the divider and hugged his sister. The two of them stayed like that as the judge finished.

"Mr. Olmstead you will be remanded to the state correctional facility until sentencing at which time might I suggest you get a lawyer more familiar with courtroom decorum. This case is closed." The judge banged his gavel on the podium before him and Callie stood up, Jude still hugging her around her waist. Callie could see Liam fuming over his loss, but what surprised her was when he managed to fend off both bailiffs and make a mad dash toward Callie. Callie saw him coming and quickly pushed Jude behind her and just as Liam got close enough to hurt her, Callie did something that surprised everyone. She threw her hand upward, palm open and the base of her hand made contact with Liam's nose. Liam cried out in pain as he grabbed at his nose that was now clearly broken. Callie took advantage of him being in such pain and grabbed him by his collar, effectively forcing him to his knees.

"If you ever raise your hand to be again, you better pray you strike me dead." Callie pushed him backwards just enough to send him to the floor, giving the bailiffs another chance to actually handcuff him and lead him away. All of that happened in less than a minute and ever single member of the Foster family stood in a state of shock.

"That…kicked ass." Jesus was the first one to speak and he climbed over the divider and hugged Callie tightly. Everyone else broke out of their state of shock and quickly rushed to Callie, hugged her and celebrating in the fact that, if nothing else, they one this fight. The judge reminded them that they were set to meet the following day for him to decide the custody of both Callie and Jude. When the celebrating died down everyone agreed they all were ready to go home. This time as they left the courthouse Stef didn't lead, mostly because she couldn't keep up with Callie was she strolled out of the building. With Jude's hand tightly gripped in her own Callie walked out into the onslaught on cameras and questions. Callie walked through the crowd of reporters, who all parted like the red sea as she walked toward the van. As everyone got into the van Callie again heard one question that made her pause.

**What happened in there today Callie?**

Callie turned around with a bright smile on her face and answered, "two years ago, Liam Olmstead took things from me that I can never get back. Today, I won my case and in the process I got one of those things back."

**What's that?**

Callie smiled and answered with confidence, "my dignity, I got my dignity back."

**So that was, once again way longer than I meant for it to be. Hopefully, you all liked how I handled things with Liam and this part of the trial. My training starts tomorrow and I'm not sure what kind of mood I will be in afterwards, but I look forward to hearing everyone's thoughts on this chapter as I work on the next one.**


	17. Even If It Breaks Your Heart

The drive home was a much less somber occasion than the drive to court had been that morning. The kids had all piled into the van and Sharon had opted to ride with Mike back to the Foster house. Once back at the house, the kids were all upstairs, talking loudly and celebrating in their own way that Callie had gotten to see the justice system work in her favor for once. Downstairs in the kitchen Sharon joined Lena and Stef who were sitting at the table enjoying the happy moment, all of them knowing that it could be fleeting.

"We should do something special tonight." Lena said it matter of fact, like it was the only logical thing to say.

"I don't want tonight to turn into some kind of last supper Lena." Lena looked up at Sharon for some help and so the older women jumped in.

"That's not what she was saying and you know it. Stef, come on, you won, Callie won. It's not out of the question to celebrate."

"We've only won half this fight mom, tomorrow could be a very different day."

"All the more reason to enjoy tonight. Now, go change and tell my grandchildren to pack their gear because we are taking them to the beach."

"The beach?" Stef looked at her mother with a confused expression.

"That's where she and Jude like to spend time is it not?"

"How did you know that?" Stef questioned her mother, knowing it had never come up in a conversation that Sharon had been a part of.

"You forget my dear daughter, I know everything. Now go." Stef got up from her seat and yelled up the stairs as she walked that the family would be having a bonfire night on the beach. The house was thrown into a state of frantic movements with all the kids grabbing towels and all their gear before meeting downstairs. Callie didn't do anything more than change her clothes and grab her guitar, but she looked just as happy for the beach trip as all the other kids did. After packing the car full of people and of beach gear, they were off to the closest beach. Sharon rode shotgun next to Stef who was driving. During the whole 20 minutes drive Stef said nothing and Sharon noticed. She also noticed the white-knuckle grip her daughter had on the steering wheel. Once they finally pulled into a packing spot the car was empty of both the kids and the beach supplies. Stef watched as the kids ran ahead and began setting up the chairs and the things they would need for a fire.

"For a woman who minutes ago demanded that this not be a depressing last meal, you are going out of your way to make it exactly that."

"Mom, please, not now."

"Then when Stephanie. They are not stupid children, any of them; they will pick up on your mood. So you either need to face what's eating you alive or let it go."

"I'm not just going to let her go." Stef snapped at her mother and Sharon gave Stef the telling look all mothers have that told Stef that her mother had hit that nerve on purpose.

"I never said to let **her** go, but this fear will eat you alive if you let it and she'll see it written all over your face and she'll handle it just like you will. I swear, she becomes more and more your child every second."

"What if we lose?" Stef huffed.

"What if we win?" Sharon quickly responded.

"Mom, this isn't a roll of the dice in Vegas, this is a conversation about the futures of two kids who have been beaten down by life."

"Sounds like a gamble worth taking to me. Honey, if you give up before the fight you've already lost. Put up a fight, see what happens, look at what the reward will be if you win." Sharon pointed to where the kids were trying to help Lena to spark a fire. Callie looked up for a split second; just long enough to make eye contact with Stef and long enough to know she was being talked about. Sharon walked away from her daughter and joined her grandchildren at the fire pit. Stef collected herself and did the same and with a little effort they finally managed to get the fire lit. They laid out food, mostly hotdogs and things that are easily to cook over an open flame. The kids all poked each other with the sticks as they cooked their food and if you didn't know the family, you would never know that they were trying very hard to forget what tomorrow morning could mean for their family. They ate and talked, mostly telling stories about other beach days that ended in some bizarre fashion. The kids got to be carefree for a while and not worry about anything; they got to just be and their mothers were thankful for the moment of peace. After they had eaten and successfully gotten the boys to leave the marshmallows for the s'mores alone, the kids all ran off to do various beach activities, mostly consisting of running through the water.

Callie reached over and grabbed a blanket and her guitar and followed Jude as he chased after Jesus. She settled into a spot near the water, but ultimately decided to stay on the dry part of the sand. Callie watched and yelled after Jude as he splashed through the water with the twins, while Brandon would sneak up and throw his brothers into the surf. Callie would laugh and Jude looked happier than Callie had ever seen him. Brandon and Jesus were trying to show Jude how to dive under the waves as you swam out and for the first time that Callie could remember she was perfectly happy to let her foster siblings take care of her brother. Maybe, she thought, that was because for the first time, Jude wasn't just her brother anymore…they had people in their lives that cared. The reality of the situation had been weighing on Callie's mind since they left the house. She knew what was most likely to happen and her heart felt heavy in her chest at the mere thought of being ripped away from her brother. It hurt even more when she thought about what it would feel like to lose the only family she and Jude had ever known and soon Callie was sitting all alone with a head full of heartbreaking possibilities. Without much warning Jude plopped down next to his sister and handed her the guitar.

"Play me something." Callie shook her head and focused back on her brother.

"What do you want me to play?"

"Anything. You look sad, maybe playing something will make you feel better." Callie played with the chords for a while, but didn't really do anything.

"Tell you what, let me practice and when I'm done you can dry off and I will take requests while we make smores?"

"Ok." Jude understood that Callie needed a minute so he ran back over to Brandon and Jesus. Callie kept the guitar steady in her arms and returned to strumming the instrument, but this time she knew what she was playing.

**So lately, been wondering**

**Who will be there to take my place**

**When I'm gone, you'll need love**

**To light the shadows on your face**

**If a great wave shall fall**

**It'd fall upon us all**

**And between the sand and stone**

**Could you make it on your own?**

**If I could, then I would**

**I'll go wherever you will go**

**Way up high or down low**

**I'll go wherever you will go**

Callie looked up to watch her brother running around in the surf, trying to help Brandon and Jesus get Mariana all the way into the water by means of splashing her and making her frustrated.

**And maybe, I'll find out**

**The way to make it back someday**

**To watch you, to guide you**

**Through the darkest of your days**

**If a great wave shall fall**

**It'd fall upon us all**

**Well I hope there's someone out there**

**Who can bring me back to you**

**If I could, then I would**

**I'll go wherever you will go**

**Way up high or down low**

**I'll go wherever you will go**

**Run away with my heart**

**Run away with my hope**

**Run away with my love**

**I know now, just quite how**

**My life and love might still go on**

**In your heart, in your mind**

**I'll stay with you for all of time**

**If I could, then I would**

**I'll go wherever you will go**

**Way up high or down low**

**I'll go wherever you will go**

Callie stopped playing and almost immediately afterwards she felt someone sit down beside her and with turning to see who it was, Callie knew who had joined her on the blanket.

"Can I ask you a favor?" Callie asked cautiously. Stef didn't hesitate to answer immediately, "name it." Callie smiled. Stef didn't care what the favor was, and maybe deep down she already knew what Callie was going to ask, but regardless, she was ready to do whatever it took to do that favor for Callie.

"Wherever they send me…you don't let him follow me."

"Callie, let's just see…"

"No." Callie stood up from the blanket and walked down so that she was leaving footprints on the wet sand. Stef followed and soon both women were ankle deep in the surf.

"We've spent 8 years trying to find a soft place to land. Do you have any idea how exhausting that is? I mean my only friend in this world was a four year old that needed me to be his mother. That wasn't fair to me or to him. I didn't know what I was doing and he deserved better."

"Callie, you loved him selflessly. He got the best big sister he could have asked for."

Callie smiled, but it was clear that she didn't believe what Stef had told her. "He had a big sister, but he needed a mother. Now he has two."

"So do you." Stef was having a hard time with this too, but she didn't want Callie to give up.

"His place is here, with you and Lena. This family needs to be his last family. He'll never be as safe as he is here anywhere else. I mean you guys can make sure no one bullies him and when he falls in love with some stupid teenage boy who breaks his heart, at least he'll have two people in his corner who understand. The first month will be the worst for him, probably won't sleep much and if he does he'll have nightmares. I was always the one that ran away, so I doubt he'll try that and even if he does, he'd panic and stop before he leaves the front yard. Just remind him that its not forever. I'll age out of the system in about two years and I'll make sure that I move somewhere close to you guys. I'm not going to step on your toes, you'll still be his parents I just don't want him to think that I'm leaving forever or abandoning him. Oh, and he's allergic to cats, though I can't for the life of me think of how that is relevant." Callie was rambling and Stef reached out and rubbed the teen's shoulder and this time Callie didn't flinch away or collapse, she simply turned into Stef's arms and hugged her. Callie cried into Stef's shirt and kept talking through the tears.

"I don't mind giving up the next two years of my life in some hell hole as long as I know that for the next six years of his life he is somewhere safe. I know if he stays with you I don't have to worry about him."

"Honey, let's be real. You'll worry about him all your lives."

"Not if he's with you guys." Callie pulled away and brushed tears out of her eyes with the back of her hand. "He'll lose me and get two moms, two brothers and another sister. At least he won't be alone."

"And what about you? Huh? How do you factor into all of this?"

"I get sent to some "facility where my needs can be tended to" and when I get out all my problems will be ten times worse than before. Those homes with people who have actual problems aren't really well monitored and if you think I was beat up after juvie, just wait and see. But I'd live on the surface of the moon if it meant he got to stay with you guys." Callie watched as the boys finally started to come in out of the water and settle at the fire. Jude ran over to his sister and pulled at her hand for her to follow.

"I'll be right behind you buddy, I have to grab the guitar and the blanket." Jude ran ahead, once again leaving Callie allow with Stef. Callie did as she said and followed the blanket and picked up the guitar. She turned to Stef who wasn't really paying much attention to Callie at that moment. The sun was starting to go down and she had her gaze set on the horizon.

"I'll be ok. You know that right?" Stef looked back at the teenager and wanted to say something profound and deep, but Callie beat her to it.

"I promise; I'll come home in one piece. Besides, no matter what hell I have waiting for me…the last two months you've given me, given us…" Callie tried to swallow her tears but they were streaming down her face. "These last two months, will get me through the next two years." Callie finished her sentence and walked towards where Jude was now standing in waiting for her to join them. Stef snuffled and did her level best to pull herself together before she sat down in the chair next to Lena. She was snapped back into reality when Jude had finally pestered Callie into playing a song for everyone to hear as they made smores and watched the sunset.

**Way back on the radio dial,**

**The fire got lit inside a bright-eyed child.**

**Every note just wrapped around his soul,**

**From steel guitars, to Memphis, all the way to rock and roll.**

Callie leaned into her brother for the chorus which made the young boy smile as she bounced his knee to the music his sister was making.

**Ohhh, I can hear 'em playin'.**

**I can hear the ringin' of a beat up ol' guitar.**

**Ohhh, I can hear 'em singin',**

**"Keep on dreamin', even if it breaks your heart."**

**Downtown is where I used to wander.**

**Old enough to get there but too young to get inside.**

**So I would stand out on the sidewalk,**

**Listen to the music playin' every Friday night.**

**Ohhh, I can hear 'em playin'.**

**I can hear the ringin' of a beat up ol' guitar.**

**Ohhh, I can hear 'em singin',**

**"Keep on dreamin', even if it breaks your heart."**

**Some dreams stay with you forever,**

**Drag you around but bring you back to where you were.**

**Some dreams keep on gettin' better,**

**Gotta keep believin' if you wanna know for sure.**

**Ohhh, I can hear 'em playin'.**

**I can hear the ringin' of a beat up ol' guitar.**

**Ohhh, I can hear 'em singin',**

**"Keep on dreamin', even if it breaks your heart."**

**Keep on dreamin', even if it breaks your heart.**

**Keep on dreamin' **

**Don't let it break your heart.**

"Well if you teach Jesus to play the drums and get Mariana to a place where she can carry a tune, you'll be ready to give the Partridge Family a run for their money." Sharon cracked a joke and everyone laughed. It broke the tension and allowed for everyone to smile and tell Callie how well she had played the song. The whole family sat at the fire pit until it was down to embers and the sun was completely gone. With the help of flashlights they all packed up their gear and shoved it back in the van before heading home. Once back at the house, the beach gear was basically dropped in the garage with the idea that they would deal with it some other time. The kids all got ready for bed and soon the house was a little too quiet. Lena went upstairs to check only to find Jesus blowing up one of the air mattresses and shoving it into the space between Mariana's bed and Callie's.

"And what might I ask is wrong with your bed?" Lena pointed to the air mattress as Jesus finally got the thing to fit in the narrow space.

"Nothing is wrong with it."

"Let me rephrase. What are you doing?" Jesus got up off the floor and pulled his mother into her own bedroom, away from the eyes and ears of his siblings.

"If they leave tomorrow it's gonna suck."

"Jesus, we won't…"

"Let that happen. I know, but still. Jude won't sleep tonight without Callie by his side; we all know that. No point in fighting it. I'll share a bed with either Brandon or Mariana. Call it a slumber party if you want to put a label on it." Lena was touched and sad for her children. They wanted to be in one room in case it was their last chance to spend the night under the same roof. Jesus took his mother's silence as the ok to leave the room and go back to Callie and Mariana's room. Lena went back downstairs to find Stef and her mother sitting in the living room with a mug in their hands.

"Isn't a bit late for coffee?"

Sharon nodded her head at her daughter in law, "sure is. However, it's never too late for Jack Daniels." Sharon took another gulp and Lena had to smile at her mother in law's behavior.

"The kids all settled in?" Stef asked her wife.

"All in one room."

"One room? All five of them in one room?"

"Go see for yourself if you don't believe me." Stef believed Lena, but she still went to go see for herself. As she shut off the upstairs lights the only light on was a small light coming from Callie and Mairana's room. As Stef got closer she heard music being played from what she found out to be Callie's cell phone. Standing in the door, Stef saw what Lena had been referring to and sure enough Lena had been telling the truth. All five children were settled into the girls room. Jesus was laying face first on Mariana's bed while his twin sister used his back as a pillow and shared the bed with him. Brandon was on his back on the blow up mattress that was a little too short for the teenager, but he didn't seem to care. And not surprisingly, Callie was propped up against her pillows with Jude snuggled into her side, almost totally asleep. Stef watched as Callie shut off the light, casting the room in darkness, save for the light coming from the window that let in moonlight. The music being played over the phone's small speakers was a song Stef thought sounded familiar, but she wasn't sure. The music was playing softly and she could hear Callie singing, just loud enough to lull everyone to sleep, but not loud enough to draw attention to herself.

**God on high**

**Hear my prayer**

**In my need**

**You have always been there**

**He is young**

**He's afraid**

**Let him rest**

**Heaven blessed.**

**Bring him home**

**Bring him home**

**Bring him home.**

**He's like the son I might have known**

**If God had granted me a son.**

**The summers die**

**One by one**

**How soon they fly**

**On and on**

**And I am old**

**And will be gone.**

**Bring him peace**

**Bring him joy**

**He is young**

**He is only a boy**

**You can take**

**You can give**

**Let him be**

**Let him live**

**If I die, let me die**

**Let him live**

**Bring him home**

**Bring him home**

**Bring him home.**

Stef felt guilty. Like she eavesdropping on something sacred and as she stood in the doorway, completely in awe at her family, all she could whisper into the now silent room was, "goodnight my babies."

**Ok, so I'm heading home to CA tomorrow because some family stuff is going on so please be patient with me on updates, but the next chapter will be the final day in court and will most likely be long because of that. Let me know what you all thought.**


	18. My Hero

Callie woke up before her alarm was set to go off and with very careful movements she pealed her still sleeping brother off her and managed to make it through the maze of sleeping bodies that littered her and Mariana's room. Callie grabbed her duffel bag and stuffed it into the hall closest before she made her way downstairs. No one needed to see that had already packed her things, assuming that she would lose this part of her case and Callie was familiar with being given ten minutes to pack. If she had her choice she'd rather spend those ten minutes saying goodbye. Actually if she had her way, this trial wouldn't have been necessary at all and she could still be in bed, surrounded by her siblings.

Callie went into the kitchen and hit the start button for the coffee machine, knowing full well that Stef would have set up the coffee the night before. Callie watched the coffee brew and when the pot was full she poured a mug of it for herself and sat down at the dinning room table with her mug and a large envelope that she had retrieved from her bag and tucked under her arm. Callie took out each piece of paper and read through the professionally fine print. When she saw that it was all in order she took a deep breath and swiftly added her signature at the bottom of each printed page. As her pen stilled a voice shook her back into reality.

"I'd read that one more time. That fine print will get you every time and next thing you know you've signed away your first born son." Sharon smiled at Callie who offered forced smile in return.

"That's kind of the idea." Callie dated the last page and put them all back into the envelope and sealed it. She rose up from the table and handed the envelope to Sharon.

"I know you don't owe me anything, but if things don't go my way today, can you please make sure Stef and Lena read through this."

"I'm not going to give them anything before I know what it is that you are trying to hide." Callie opened the envelope once more, knowing that she would have to tell Sharon sooner or later. One by one she hand the papers to Stef's mother.

"This gives them control over the money that came from our mother's life insurance policy. This one puts them as the custodians of Jude's life insurance policy. This one puts them as the benefactors of that policy as well as mine. This one is a savings account in my name that I have authorized them as users of the account, so they can put in and take out whatever they need. Everything that is in Jude's name or mine is now their's or it will be if they file these properly."

"Callie…when did you put these together?"

"I have my secrets. Just please give it to them." Callie walked away leaving the envelope in Sharon's outstretched hand and half way up the stairs Callie turned around.

"Thank you." Sharon turned around and shrugged her shoulders.

"For what?"

"I haven't had parents since I was 8 and Jude was 3 or 4, but neither of us ever had a grandparent. They had died long before we were born. I know it was only a few days, but thank you."

"I assure you it was my pleasure and I can tell you right now, I'm not done being your grandma so I'll tell you what I told my daughter last night. If you give up before this fight even starts I will haunt your dreams. Am I clear?"

Callie smiled and nodded, "very clear."

"Good, now go get dressed." Callie went back upstairs, leaving Sharon alone in the dining room. While she was still alone, Sharon looked over the paper work and was shocked at what Callie had just signed away. The life insurance policy on her was paid in full and for that matter; Jude's was as well. The money they received after their mother's unfortunate demise was a sizable chunk of money that Callie had put into a high interest credit union when she was 10. In all that paper work there were three sets of letters, all labeled for member of the family: one for Stef and Lena, one for Jude, and one for the other siblings. Sharon put everything back into the envelope, knowing it wasn't her right to look at those letters, as they were most likely heartfelt goodbyes to the family. Sharon quickly stuffed the envelope into her purse before heading into the kitchen to steal some of the coffee before the rest of the house awoke.

Upstairs both Stef and Lena were awake and so when Callie knocked on their door asking to use their shower she was told it was all her's. Since her relapse Callie had been using Stef and Lena's shower because both women had taken out all the sharp objects in their bathroom and they knew Callie would be safer in a bathroom that was connected to their bedroom. Both mothers started getting dressed in silence, like they were afraid that by saying what was happening that morning, that it would become far too real. The water started running in the bathroom and second later it was clear that Callie forgot that the door was open because she started singing loud enough to be heard in the master bedroom.

**They thought they could dispose of me**

**They tried to make me small**

**I suffered each indignity**

**But now rise above it all**

**Yes, the price I paid was all I had**

**But at last, I found release**

**And if something good can come from bad**

**The past can rest in peace**

**Oh if you see someone's hurt**

**And in need of a hand**

**Don't forget me**

**Or hear a melody crying from some baby grand**

**You don't forget me**

**When you sing happy birthday to someone you love**

**Or see diamonds you wish were all free**

**Please say that you won't;**

**I pray that you don't forget me**

**But forget every man who I ever met**

**'Cause they only lived to control**

**For a kiss they paid a thousand**

**Yet they paid fifty cents for my soul**

**They took their piece**

**The price of fame that no one can repay**

**Ah, but they didn't buy me when they bought my name**

**And that is why I pray**

**That when you see someone's hurt**

**And in need of a hand**

**You don't forget me**

**Or hear a melody crying from some baby grand**

**You don't forget me**

**When you sing happy birthday to someone you love**

**Or see diamonds you wish were all free**

**Please say that you won't;**

**I pray that you don't forget me**

**There are some in this world who have strength on their own**

**Never broken or in need of repair**

**But there are some born to shine who can't do it alone**

**So protect them and take special care**

**Take care**

**And don't forget me**

**Please take care**

**And don't forget me**

**When you look to the heavens with someone you love**

**And a light shining bright from afar**

**Hope you see my face there**

**And then offer a prayer**

**And please let me be**

**Let me be that star**

When the singing stopped both women were sitting on the edge of the bed in tears.

"If we lose, we're mortgaging the house again and hiring the best family rights attorney in the state. I'm not giving someone else another chance to break her down again." Lena stated her case plainly and left the room in a rush, leaving her wife in an almost amused state. Stef wasn't the only one that fell in love with these kids and wanted to be their parent, Lena had as well. Stef left the room to let Callie get dressed in private, knowing that she would be back in the room soon to help the teen wrap her arm. Downstairs Stef and Lena split a bagel, not able to force anything else down and their nerves making coffee an impossible option. Brandon and the twins came downstairs about an hour later with Jude trailing not far behind them. Callie came downstairs already dressed and she grabbed a seat at the table and like everyone else tried to eat something for breakfast even though her stomach never felt more uneasy in all her life.

The other kids went about getting dressed and when he was almost ready Jude ran down the stairs to his sister asking for her to tie this tie for him. Callie finished her coffee and knelt down so she could get a better angle on the tie. Callie moved the fabric around and finally got it to cooperate. She smoothed the silk against her bother's chest and kissed his forehead.

"All set buddy."

"What's going to happen today Callie?"

"You mean what is the judge going to ask you?" The boy nodded yes and Callie wished she had a better answer than I don't know.

"I'm not really sure buddy. He'll probably ask you about living with me, ask out our other foster homes, ask about this one, things like that. You aren't on trial here baby."

"Who is?"

"Well, I guess I am."

"That's not fair." Callie sighed and shook her head.

"No, it isn't fair. But listen, everything I do in there today is going to be for you ok. I'll fight like hell to make sure you get to stay here."

"Who's going to fight for you?"

"I guess I will."

"Isn't that a lot for one person to do?"

"Nothing I can't handle. Don't worry buddy, we're going to make this right." Everyone came downstairs about that time causing the conversation between brother and sister to end abruptly. As they got into the car Stef knew that his car ride would be spent in silence and it bothered her more than any other silence she had ever encountered before. She let the radio drown out the sound of everyone breathing heavy and she had never been more thankful to pull into a parking spit at the courthouse. By this point, the media circus was long gone. They had their story and had follow up interviews lined up, so their presence was no longer needed. Once through the security checkpoints the whole family made their way to the small family courtroom that they had become so familiar with. Stef, Lena and Sharon all took the first row of seats and the twins and Brandon sat behind them. There was no lawyer for this stage of things, so Callie sat in the seat usually reserved for him and Jude sat to her left. There was no defense attorney and this was less of a trial and more of a hearing so it was just the family and the judge in a room that suddenly seemed to swallow them whole. The judge walked in and sat down at his bench and after flipping through a few papers he looked up at Callie.

"Did you enjoy celebrating your win Ms. Jacob?"

"With all due respect sir, my mother always taught us not to celebrate before you actually won and considering that we are back here this morning, I still have one more hill to climb before I have won anything." The judge nodded and was once again surprised at how mature Callie's answers were for everything asked of her.

"Well then, let's get down to business shall we. We are here today to decide the custody of one Jude Alexander Jacob and one Callie Christine Jacob. First thing first, Mrs. Foster?"

"Yes." Both Stef and Lena answered and the judge corrected himself. "Stephanie Foster?" Stef stood up and the judge looked down at his paper quickly before reestablishing eye contact.

"Mrs. Foster, you and your wife have a lot of people who think very highly of you, your family and your abilities as parents." The judge held up a folder that was almost an inch thick.

"These are all testimonials from friends family, coworkers, supervisors, neighbors and social workers who have literally nothing but good things to say about you both." Stef smiled and Lena squeezed her hand as the judge continued.

"You both clearly have a lot of people who love you and love these children, but one of these stood out as I read through them." The judge held up one that appeared to be more than a page long.

"Your father spoke about you as though he thought you were running for Pope, Mrs. Foster." Stef chocked on the air in her lungs.

"My what?"

"You father is Frank is he not?"

"Yea…Yes, yes he is, but, I never asked him to write one."

"Well, from the content of the letter he was informed about the need of this letter by your mother and he felt compelled to write one on your and your wife's behalf. I'll be honest Mrs. Foster, I've read thousands of these letters, but you father just topped my list." The judge flipped to the second page; seeing that Stef just didn't believe that her father could have written such a glowing letter in her defense.

"_My daughter would be the first to tell you that I haven't been the best father and she would be right to say so. I broke the most fundamental rule of parenting. To love your child without reservation and without conditions no matter what they do. I made her teenage years harder than they needed to be, but in spite of my influence she grew up into a woman any parent would be proud to claim as their own. I suppose I have my ex-wife to thank for that. My daughter and I would fight over whether or not the sky is blue if you gave us the chance to; it's always been like that between us. Never saw eye to eye on anything other than baseball and football. Everything else was a battle that I always felt had to continue far longer than was necessary, but there have been moments in my life in which all those moments have faded away and my daughter and I have shared a common love and found some semblance of peace."_

"_When my grandson was born I got to hold him first and to this day, I'm not sure how my heart didn't beat right out of my chest when I first laid eyes on that beautiful baby boy. When Stef and Lena introduced all of us to the twins that feeling returned and I was looking_ _forward to the chance to spoil all three of my grandchildren. I never thought I'd get to experience that feeling again your honor, but then, like all good things, this moment snuck up when no one was expecting it. I only met Callie once, but the second I saw her and heard her story I felt that all too familiar tug in my chest and I knew that this child had finally found her way home. I only met her face to face for a few minutes, but the second I laid eyes on her I could've sworn I was looking at a younger version of my own daughter. Her brother showing up was an added blessing and seeing how much that girl loves her brother is the greatest testament to family I've seen in all my years on this earth. My plea may go unheard, but I would be remiss if I didn't try. Your honor, my daughter and her wife love these children, they deserve these children and more over these children deserve this family. My daughter and I don't have touching moments anymore, and truthfully speaking we probably never did, but if I can change that please let it begin with this letter. There is no better home on this earth for these children than in my daughter's house. She and her wife will give these children all the love they deserve and all the love they had been denied. Second only to her own mother, my daughter is the parent I wish for every child to have and it is my honest opinion that with my daughter as one mother and Lena as the other, that these two children will bring a level of pride to the Foster name that none of us thought possible."_ The judge put the paper down and looked out at Stef who looked like someone one had just slapped her. She was shocked at the beauty and sincerity in her father's words and it was overwhelming to hear it in that moment.

"It goes on for another three pages Mrs. Foster, but I think you get the idea." Stef sat down without saying a word and Lena laced their finger together and tried to offer her wife some encouragement.

"Now, if this was a normal case of custody these letters would be enough to convince me that the Jacob siblings belong in the Foster household indefinitely, but sadly this is not a normal case and other things must be taken into consideration including Ms. Jacobs file."

"Your honor, may I say something to that point?"

"The floor is yours Ms. Jacob." Callie stood up and took a deep breath as if to still her anger.

"With all due respect your honor, that file in front of you is a poor representation of who I am as a person. I am not my file sir, I am so much more than what that file makes me out to be. It lists off foster homes that didn't work out, foster homes that beat and abused us, hospitals stays, pictures of bruises and scars from beatings that could have killed me, every sob story I have to my name is written in that stupid folder and it's followed me around since I was 8 years old, like a rain cloud that will not let up and give a me a moment of peace. I understand that you want to take my file into consideration, but I implore you, your honor, consider it and then please ignore it. I'm standing in front of you, if you want to know something about my life, my past or my future I am here to answer any question this court has. All I ask is that you understand that the folder you have open in front of you does not represent who I am sir and it never has."

"Ms. Jacob these files have very detailed notes about the person…"

"Does that file tell you that my mother had a miscarriage before she was pregnant with Jude? Does it tell you that when she found out she was pregnant with him we both cried for two days because we knew it was a true miracle? No, it tells you that my mother gave birth to two children and died of a brain aneurysm 8 years ago. Does that file tell you that I learned how to read when I was 3? Or that Jude could never fall asleep unless both my mother and I kissed him goodnight? Does it tell you that the first foster father we had told me that I would never amount to anything? Does it tell you that for the first three years after mom died Jude always made me mother's day cards because he honestly couldn't tell the difference between me as his sister and me as his mother figure? Does it say any of that your honor, because unless it does I have to respectfully disagree with the file being considered a detailed look at my life."

"I understand that you have to make a hard decision today your honor, but I ask that when you do please don't make it because a pile of papers told you what other people think of my past. If you are going to rip me away from my brother and my family, then give me a reason, a real reason that doesn't being with 'well your file said'. I deserve better than that your honor and I beg you please, if you make a decision against me, even if you have to come up with a lie, don't tell me that I lost because my file told you that I wasn't worth the effort."

"Is that all Ms. Jacobs?" Callie took one more deep breath, knowing that what she had to say next was going to be hard to say.

"No sir. I know that you have to decide on both my placement and my brother's and in light of that fact I have a request, or a plea or whatever you care to call it to propose. I'll go wherever you say, to whatever hellhole of a facility that you think I deserve to be sent to and I will not put up a fight, though I may cry. I know I'll cry, but I'll go with no resistance and all I ask for in return is that you consider allowing my baby brother to remain in the custody of Stef and Lena."

"Callie!" Callie heard her brother cry out at her words and she felt his arms wrap around her waist as she let the tears fall from her eyes. She knelt down and made eye contact with him, not caring that this wasn't the time for this conversation.

"Hey, listen to me buddy. It's going to be ok, alright."

"Why would you say that? Do you want to leave me?" Callie shook her head and kissed her brother's forehead as tears streamed down her face.

"No. I don't want to leave you now or ever, but if me going away is the price I have to pay to keep you here then I will pay it ok? Your place is here with them."

"We're supposed to be a package deal." It always came back to that and Callie regretted ever teaching Jude that phrase when they were young.

"We will always be a package deal, but this is something I have to do." Callie kissed her brother again and pushed him back towards his chair and the 12 year old ignored his assigned seat completely and went over to where the family sat and crawled into a spot between Stef and Lena. Callie turned back toward the judge and talked through her tears.

"I was 8 when our mom died your honor and even though I never got to make the promise to her face I made it as I laid her in her grave, that I would do whatever it took, pay any price needed, move heaven and earth to make sure that my brother was safe, loved and cared for and I will not disrespect her memory by backing down from that promise today because it's hard. I love that little boy behind me more than I love my own life and I would go to my grave fighting for him, so I have no problem being sent away if it means he gets to stay with the only family we have had in 8 years. I won't matter how many miles you put between him and I because for the first time in my life I will not run away to try and find him because I will know where he is and I wont have a reason to run. I can survive any hell I encounter after today because I'll go to bed at night knowing that he is tucked into a safe and warm bed. I'll know that his big brother is in the room with him to comfort him if he wakes up with a nightmare or cries out for me in his sleep. I know his other big brother will be there to make sure he grows up into a man that knows that family always comes first. I won't run because I'll know his mothers will be there in the morning to get him up and ready for school. I know they'll be there when he get home from school and complains that he still doesn't understand math and I know they be able to find him a tutor that can help him. I know he'll have another big sister who can easily fill my place and be the one he fights with the most often, but only because he loves her like he loves me. I'll know that every holiday we ever spent alone will now be filled with a noisy house and with family. I won't have a reason to run away your honor because this time I know that he is with family and they will take care of him in a way I just can't." Callie gasped for breath between her sobs and continued.

"I will tell you the same thing I told Stef last night. I can make it through whatever the next two years hold because the last two months have been the most beautiful experience of my whole life. Two months with these people behind me, two months of being loved by a family, will carry me through the next two years of my life and will keep me going when I want to give up. I've always loved being a big sister your honor and with the Fosters I was blessed with a growing list of siblings. I went from one baby brother, to having two younger brothers and a sister who all look up to me for a reason I cannot understand. I always wanted a big brother, secretly that is. I wanted someone who would protect me and be my best friend at the same time. Brandon and I have birthdays just months apart, but he is my older brother in every sense of the word. Believe me your honor I want a life with these people more than I've ever wanted anything in this life. I want to fight with Mariana over cleaning her half of the room and yell at her to save some hot water for the rest of us." Mariana smiled through her own set of tears and wished she could say something to Callie as she continued on.

"I want to learn what in the hell I am doing wrong on level 14 of Call of Duty Black Ops and the only person who can teach me that is Jesus." Jesus laughed, because Callie was the first foster sibling he had that genuinely made him feel like he knew something that no one else knew.

"I want to enjoy the last years of high school and with Brandon's help I want to pour over college brochures while we plan our futures. I want him to scare my boyfriends when they pick me up and drop me off at home. I want him to come to my rescue when I get my first flat tire. I want him to laugh at me when I play the G chord on my guitar wrong. And one day, when I finally find a man on this earth that can look me in the eye and tell me he loves me enough to marry me I want him to awkwardly stand behind Jude and try to hide the fact that he is crying." In that moment, there was no hiding the fact that Brandon was crying harder than he thought possible. He didn't know that he wanted all those thing for Callie, but he did, he wanted a chance to be her big brother and all he could think was how much it would hurt if he never got that chance.

"I want, so much to able to call the women sitting behind me my mothers. I didn't know people like them existed anymore, sir. I had lost faith that good people like them still walked this earth, but they do and for some reason I may never understand, these two women love Jude and me like they gave birth to us. These women made me believe in the goodness in people again your honor and I don't want to leave that. I want to celebrate birthdays, Christmases and weddings with them. I want to come running home after a hard day and hear them tell me that tomorrow will be better even though it might not be. All the things I just said, all of it is true. I want to go home with my family today your honor, but at the same time I would give anything that I ever thought meant anything to me to insure that Jude got to do it instead." Callie's face was beat red and she didn't dare look behind her because she knew that everyone was crying and she couldn't handle as she tried to handle her own tears.

"Well, Ms. Jacob, that was some speech."

"I meant every word sir."

"I don't doubt it Ms. Jacob. And seeing as you are so set on sacrificing everything for your brother, why don't we start with my ruling on him?" Callie nodded her head and turned around to hold her hand out for Jude to join her. Jude hesitantly stood up from his place nestled between his mothers and joined his sister in front of the room.

"You doing a little bit better son?"

"Yes sir." Jude sniffled, but stood up straight and tried to act tough.

"Your sister loves you and awful lot."

"I know she does sir, I love her too. But I don't want her to leave."

"Son these cases sometimes…"

"It's not fair."

"Jude." Callie scolded her brother's outburst, but the judge pushed Jude to finish his thought.

"All her life she gave up everything for me and even now, when she deserves to be happy, she's willing to throw it all away for me. I think it's wildly unfair that she's getting punished for what Liam did to her. She only came forward to save another girl and her reward for telling the truth is being told that she isn't stable enough to live in the most secure environment we've ever known. And I want both my big sisters not just one or the other."

"Tell me Jude, if you had your way, how would today end for you and your sister?" Jude looked to his sister as if to ask for permission to actually give his opinion. Callie smiled and nodded her head.

"I want to go back home sir. I want us both to go home."

"And if your sister was separated from you?"

"I'd find her." Jude was firm in his response and Callie was shocked that her brother who was usually so soft spoken was being so protective.

"You're telling me that you would run away and try to find her?"

"With all due respect sir, that is not what I said. Callie was right in that distance wouldn't matter. You could hide her on the other side of the country and I would still find her. She is my big sister and my hero and it won't matter where you try and hide her because for the next two years of our lives, there will never be a day my heart doesn't find her."

Callie felt a new batch of tears roll down her face and all she could do is wrap her brother in a tight hug and hold him there while they both cried. They were not alone in their tears, as not one member of their family had a dry eye among them. From their seat, Stef could see the look on Callie's face: a mix of pure adoration for her brother and abject terror. She thought this to be the end, the last real chance she would have to hold her brother and tell him how much she loved him.

"I hate to interrupt Ms. Jacob, but I'm prepared to make my decision." Callie would have pulled away form Jude if he didn't have such a death grip around her body: he wasn't letting go. Callie nodded her head for the judge to continue.

"In the case of custodial rights over Jude Alexander Jacob, it is this court's opinion and my ruling the Jude remain in the care and custody of Lena Elizabeth Adams and Stephanie Marie Foster." Callie didn't hear any word after the judge said 'remain'. She smiled for a brief shining moment, knowing that her brother would be safe and that she had succeeded in that if nothing else. Jude's arms tightened around Callie and as soon as Callie felt that added pressure she knew why he was doing it and her smile faded, being replaced quickly by more tears and she buried her face into her brother's hair, as they stayed wrapped up in each other. They both had the same thought: if The judge was letting Jude stay, they he mist have taken Callie's offer t heart which meant she would be leaving.

"Ms. Jacob?" Callie gave her brother one more kiss and an extra tight squeeze before pulling back. Callie hated doing it, but she needed Jude to let go, she had to face this part alone. She looked up to she her family trying to put on a brave face, but their tears and the looks on their faces gave them away. They were overjoyed to know that Jude got to stay, but they feared what came next. Before Callie found her voice to ask Mariana stood up form her seat and walked right up to Callie. No words were shared between the two teenagers, but instead Mariana held her hand out to Jude. Callie finally felt Jude let go of her and latch onto Mariana like a life raft. Mariana didn't rejoin her family but instead fell into the seat that Callie had sat in at the start of the hearing. Jude didn't care that he getting far too tall to sit in anyone lap and Mariana certainly didn't stop him from curling into a ball in his foster sister's lap. Callie hung her head and took a few deep breaths, trying without much success to steady her breathing. She looked up at the judge with flushed cheeks and her vision was slightly blurred by the tears, but she plastered a proud look on her face and stood straight like she was bracing herself for the final blow.

"You and your brother have a way with words Ms. Jacob."

"Thank you sir."

"And for what it is worth, you've done your mother's memory proud today Ms. Jacob. You kept your promise and any parent would be proud of that. But I still have to make a decision."

"Sir, please don't drag this out." Callie had just enough energy to keep a brave face on for a few minutes more.

"Very well. Ms. Jacob one thing is painfully clear to me: that young man there loves you as much as you love him and you are, as he said, his hero." The judge made a note in the file before him and looked back at Callie. Lena and Stef had a death grip on each other's hands and the tears flowed freely from both women. Sharon sat on the other side of her daughter and had her eyes shut tight as she keep her arm wrapped around her daughter's shoulder. Brandon hand his head resting against his hands that were balled into fists as though he was trying to will the outcome they all wanted. Jesus rocked slightly in his seat and he mumbled what Brandon could only assume to be a prayer. Mariana watched Callie try and hold it together and at the same time she held Jude tight against her, trying to soothe the boy's fear.

"In the case of custodial rights over Callie Christine Jacob it is this court's opinion and my ruling that Callie remain in the care and custody of Lena Elizabeth Adams and Stephanie Marie Foster." The whole room went silent like now one trusted what they just heard.

"What?" Callie asked, on the verge of losing all her resolve. The judge removed his glasses and looked right at Callie.

"Ms. Jacob, heroes are hard to come by in this day and age and as far as I am concerned we could use a few more of them in San Diego." Callie looked paralyzed and finally the judge pointed toward the Fosters. "Go home Ms. Jacobs and I don't want to see you in this court room again unless it's to change your last name." The judge hit his gavel against the pedestal and then and only then did everyone believe what they had heard. While Callie had expected to be knocked over by Jude first, that's not how it happened. Jude was absolutely sobbing (happy tears) but sobbing all the same into Mariana's shoulder. So when Callie turned around the first thing she saw through her tears was Stef shoot up out of her seat and with Lena right behind her, she all but ran to Callie and scooped the teen into her arms. Callie was uncertain about who was holding onto whom, but she knew that in that moment she didn't care because she got to go home, with her family. When Lena finally managed to pull Stef away from Callie, that's when Jude finally pulled away from Mariana and ran full speed toward his sister. Callie didn't care that the hug actually knocked her off balance because Stef kept her hand on Callie's back and kept them both upright.

"What do we do now?" Jude asked his sister as he brushed away tears form her eyes.

"You heard the judge buddy, let's go home." Callie held out her hand and Jude gladly took it. Everyone walked to the car with a renewed bounce in their step, like Christmas had in fact come early for the entire Foster family. Once they got on the road the kids were giggling which was wonderful because it meant no one noticed that Sharon had to drive home because neither Stef nor Lena was able to get a grip on their emotions. When the giggling slowed down Brandon called for the attention of everyone in the car.

"So no one is going to bring it up huh? I have to be the one to do it? Ok." Brandon sighed dramatically and then said, "your middle name is Christine?" Callie rolled her eyes and laughed along with everyone else. That joke, that simple moment, was exactly what Callie had been wanting and Brandon filled his role as big brother perfectly. It may have taken 8 years to find it, but Callie had never felt so happy to being going home.

**Well, if you didn't cry at least once, I failed at my job. I hope you guys liked it because I've been planning this out for days trying to make it fit the way I wanted it to. I figured I can have a larger family moment when they get home and everyone has had time to settle down. Anyway, let me know what you all thought anddrop me a review. **


	19. Hidden Talents

**Sorry for the wait guys. I'm visiting my parents in California and they have the worst wifi connection known to man. Anyway, I'm hoping to hear ideas from people about what they want to see in the next few chapters. I have a talent for angst so I need some fluffy ideas if anyone has them. I also have some questions for you all to weigh in on: when I have the kids go back to school Callie and Brandon will be juniors correct? Anyway, I still have to have them address Callie's cutting on a more acute level now that she is staying in the Foster household, but I'm going to push that to the next chapter I think and let them just be happy in this chapter.**

Once the whole family had gotten home the kids had made quick work of removing their more professional court clothes and had all but gotten back into their PJ's. Stef and Lena didn't stop them because…well it had been a long day and sweatpants sounded good to everybody. When everyone was settled into more comfortable clothes the kids had voted to spend the rest of the day watching movies because they fast discovered that Callie and Jude had been deprived of the wonders of Disney movies. Callie told Jude to go pick out a bunch of movies neither of them had seen before. Callie took that opportunity to sneak away into Stef and Lena's bathroom in an effort to tend to her arm without being the center of attention. She sat down on the floor with her back against the tub as she gathered the things she would need to address her wounds. The door was wide open so Callie wasn't that surprised when she looked up and saw Sharon standing in the door way.

"Need any help?" Callie smiled and shook her head as she continued to apply ointment to her arm.

"I'm almost done, thanks though." Sharon watched as Callie dressed her wounds and it bothered her how good Callie was at doing this.

"That was some speech you gave today."

"I'm just glad it worked, or maybe it wasn't needed. Maybe he was going to let us stay the whole time, but I wasn't about to risk that."

"From what I saw in that courtroom today, you aren't the only one with a natural ability for public speaking."

"I had no idea where he came up with the courage to say those things. He's usually so soft spoken and reserved."

"Nothing brings out the fight in a person like the threat of losing the person he loves most. And I bet he got the courage to say it by watching his big sister willing sacrifice everything in an effort to keep him safe." Callie nodded her head and tried not to focus on it too much.

"He would have been alright if I had been sent away. I know that much."

"My dear sweet girl, neither of you would have been alright if you had been sent away."

"He would have been taken care of for the rest of his life."

"And what about you?"

"I would have taken care of myself, like always." Callie fumbled with the bandages and Sharon knelt down, taking them in her hands and gently pressing them to Callie's still angry cuts.

"Well, maybe it's time you let someone take care of you."

"You don't have to do that."

Sharon finished with the bandages and held out her hand for Callie to take. "Honey, I have 8 years of grandmother smothering to catch up on with you and that beautiful boy downstairs. I don't have to do anything, but I want to. And if you'd let me, I bet you'd figure out pretty quick that having me a grandma kind of kicks ass." Callie laughed and let Sharon help her up.

"I didn't think grandmothers were allowed to swear."

"Who'd be dumb enough to try and stop me from swearing?" Callie laughed again and followed Sharon downstairs. Callie joined the rest of the kids in the living room. She had settled into a spot on one end of the couch with Jude already snuggled into her side. On the table there was a pile of DVD's ranging from the classic Disney movies to some of the most modern ones. Jude asked to watch the Lion King first and the twins and Brandon all shared a look of concern, but Callie waved them off.

"He knows what its about, we'll be ok." It was the one classic kids movie Callie was actually familiar with, although she had only ever viewed it once. She was positive she'd end up tearing up, but more than anything, that movie was always one she could find comfort in: yes, the dad dies, but then Simba finds a family within his friends and eventually makes his own family and that was something Callie could finally relate to. They lowered the blinds and started the movie. At one point Stef had poked in her into the living room to check on the group and her timing was, well, you could call it poor timing or perfect timing. They were about half way through the movie when Simba sees his father's spirit and talks to him. Stef watched her children's faces and for the most part they were expressionless, just enjoying a movie they had been watching since they were small. That is, all of them except the two newest members of the family, who were watching the scene with a great deal of concentration. Jude seemed wrapped up in it and Callie was mouthing the words along with the movie, like she had seen that one scene more than that one time.

"_You see, he lives in you."_

"_Simba, you have forgotten me."_

"_No, how could I?"_

"_You have forgotten who you are and so forgotten me. Look inside yourself Simba. You are more than what you have become. You must take your place in the circle of life."_

"_How can I go back? I'm not who I used to be?" _Callie had gotten caught up in mouthing the words, but in that moment she caught sight of Stef standing in the doorway and she watched with amusement as she mouthed the last line of that interaction.

"_Remember who you are. You are my son and the one true king."_ Stef winked at Callie as if to point out the playfulness of the scene, Callie was neither her son nor any kind of royalty, but that scene was just a powerful as anything else that Stef could have said in her own words. Callie nodded that she was ok and Stef took it as a sign to leave and return to the kitchen where Lena and her mom were setting up lunch for everybody.

"Everyone ok?" Stef looked up at Lena and nodded.

"Yeah, they are watching the Lion King."

"Really, and they are all ok?"

"Lena, none of our children can make it through that movie without crying, hell, we can't even do that. But they are all fine, no major breakdowns." They finished making lunch and when they were finally ready to eat the kids all appeared in the kitchen, happy for a break from the emotional movie they just watched. They all ate quickly; eager to get back to the other movies they had waiting for them. After helping Stef and Lena clean up the kitchen the kids all herded back into the living room. Sharon pulled Callie aside and handed the teenager the envelope of paperwork she had given to Sharon early that morning.

"I figured you would want this back, seeing as it will no longer be needed." Callie refused the envelope when Sharon held it out for her to take.

"They should have those things anyway, maybe not the goodbye letters, but the legal stuff should be in their names even though I'm staying."

"Your sure?"

"Don't parents usually have that kind of control over their kids finances?"

"Yes, but most kids don't have the savings you have."

"I'm hardly rich, most of that money is life insurance policies that aren't worth crap unless I die and if it's all the same to you, I'd like to avoid that."

"Callie come on, I want to watch Beauty and the Beast." Jude called his sister to join them and Sharon nodded her head, telling the teen they were done and that she could go. Sharon walked back into the kitchen and after fishing the letters out of the envelope she tossed it onto the island in the center of the kitchen. Stef was putting the dishes away and Lena had just poured drinks for the three of them when their attention was drawn towards the envelope that Sharon had unceremoniously placed on the table before them.

"What that?" Stef asked as she put the final dishes away and took her seat next to Lena.

"That is something Callie gave me very early this morning before we left for the courthouse. She told me to give it to you if we lost and she was sent to one of those facilities."

"But we won and she is staying right here, so why are you giving this to us?" Lena questioned picking the envelope up from the table.

"I asked her if she wanted it back, she said that they are yours to keep safe." Lena opened the envelope and as she read through the papers she handed them one by one to Stef.

"These are all legal documents, why does she want us to have these?" Stef dug out her glasses and read the documents more carefully and with each passing page a wave of shock hit her like a ton of bricks. She laid out each piece of paper on the counter and pointed them out to Lena as she explained.

"It appears that while Lucy Jacob never had much money, it wasn't because she wasn't making any money. She was paying off three life insurance policies: her own, Callie's and Jude's. When she died her's was completely paid, leaving the money to her children and since Callie was only 8 it was put into a bank account, after they took what they needed for funeral arrangements. Callie somehow managed to transfer the account into a high interest credit union, which is better in terms of helping the money grow. Callie's got paid off right before she left for juvie and Jude's got paid off just after she moved in with us."

"Why would she pay her's off first? She's always put his needs first." Lena didn't like admitting it, but Callie always sacrificed of herself to give Jude everything and this confused her, but Stef pointed out quickly.

"She was afraid she'd die before she got back to him." Stef went back to looking at the documents and she shook her head as she read them.

"She named us benefactors of both of their policies and added us to the bank account for her mother's pay out, along with a savings account in her name."

"Stef, she's 16 when the hell did she figure out how to handle this kind of money. I don't even know how to file half of this paper work?" Stef shook her head with a proud smile plastered across her face.

"She has proven time and time again to be very resourceful."

"Well what do we do with it now?" Stef gathered up all the papers and put them back in the envelope.

"We take them to our insurance agent in the morning and sign them, then we run by the bank and sign those as well. You said it yourself Lena, she's sixteen and she's been dealing with these things since she was barely old enough to sign her name. I think it's time we give her a break." Stef put the envelope in Lena's purse with the intention of running those errands tomorrow. They went back to chatting over their cups of coffee and only stopped when Callie came in to grab something to drink.

"So what do you think about the wonderful world of Disney?" Lena asked as Callie grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

"I think he had something against mothers, like seriously is there one Disney movie that doesn't have the mom dead in it? Other than that I'm glad I'm finally watching some of them and Jude loves all of them."

"You crazy kids decide what sounds good for dinner?" Stef threw out the question as she looked at what they had in the fridge to throw together for a meal later that night.

"Actually I was wondering if you wouldn't mind letting me cook?"

"I didn't know you could cook." Stef responded with a smile.

"I told you, hidden talents are kind of my thing."

"Well then by all means, you need anything from the store?" Callie looked at the fridge and nodded her head.

"A few things, I can bribe Brandon into driving me."

"Don't be silly, it sounds like the twins put in Toy Story and you won't be able to pull him away from that movie, it has always been his favorite. I'll drive you, we need some things anyway." Stef picked up her keys and Callie looked at herself and then her foster mother.

"We're going shopping in PJ's?"

"Why not?" Callie smiled and followed Stef out of the house and into the family van. The two of them drove for about 15 minutes before pulling into a parking lot that was connected to their local grocery store. Callie grabbed what she knew she needed quickly and then followed Stef around as she got the family's regular groceries for the week. They paid for the food and loaded it into the car before making their way back home. As they drove home Stef decided to ask what it was she had just paid for.

"So you know how to play the guitar, sing and you can cook? And I thought I knew everything about you."

"Hardly."

"Oh, yeah what else don't I know?"

"It wouldn't be a hidden talent if I told you."

"I see, well how about we talk about this hidden talent. Who taught you how to cook?"

"Some of it I picked up from watching way too much of the cooing network, the rest I learned from my mom. She taught me some of the recipes she knew before she died and the rest I found when we packed up her stuff, she had a recipe box with a ton of stuff she used to make for us."

Stef smiled, "sounds like you got to spend some quality time with her doing something she loved."

"I'd like to think so."

"So if you have all these hidden talents that makes me wonder if your brother has any."

Callie laughed, "Jude is a terrible liar and with the exception of a few things he keeps close to himself, he can't hide anything from anyone."

"He kept his sexuality a secret."

"You guys all guessed that within a few months of us living here."

"Well, you're the person closest to him, if anyone knows his hidden talents it would be you." Callie thought about it for a minute before answering.

"He can draw."

"Really?"

"Yep, he used to draw constantly when mom was alive and then afterwards he stopped. I mean he was young so it wasn't masterpiece artwork, but it made him happy. I've seen him doodling more since we moved here." Stef smiled at the thought that maybe Jude was doing something he loved again because he felt safe to do it in the Foster's house.

"Maybe we'll get him some art stuff for Christmas then?"

"He'd love that. I always tell him how good he is, but maybe hearing it from someone else will make him want to do it more." They pulled into the driveway and with a handful of bags in each hand Callie and Stef made their way into the house and into he kitchen. Callie helped put away the regular groceries before she got out the things she would need to make dinner. Stef, Lena and Sharon all offered to help, but Callie refused the help. The adults took the opportunity to go join the kids in the living room, who by that point had moved onto watching Toy Story 2. Stef and Lena squeezed onto the couch and Jude seemed happy to snuggle between them, while Brandon gave up his seat for his grandmother to sit in. There was one scene in the movie that had some heartstring pulling song being sung by Sarah Mclachlan and while no one else really noticed it much, Stef and Lena both did because Jude was suddenly gone from in between them and was headed straight for the kitchen. Lena got up to go check on him and found him exactly where she expected to find him; in the kitchen hugging Callie around her waist. She watched Callie pull a stool out and motion for Jude to sit down. She put a cutting board and knife in front of him and then after digging around in one of the grocery bags she put some of the veggies on the board for Jude to cut. The boy had helped out in the kitchen like this before and Callie knew that knife wasn't sharp enough to cause any great concern. Callie helped Jude make the first few cuts as he sliced through the vegetables and once he had it down she kissed his head and turned back to the stovetop. Stef showed up behind her wife and looked at the scene in the kitchen.

"All they had was each other for 8 years Lena, it's going to take time for him to understand that he can run to us when he's sad or hurting."

"What about her?" Lena knew that Jude would come to know that he could turn to anyone in the family for anything he needed, not just Callie. Callie was a harder case when it came to showing her that she had a real family now.

"She's already figuring it out, but we are going to have to face facts Lena, no one in this house knows the pain of losing a mother like they did, or at all. Besides, look at them, they look happy." Callie was letting Jude add the vegetables he had just cut into the pan she was working on and the boy beamed at being able to help his sister: they did look happy. An hour later, Callie told the rest of the house that dinner would be done in an hour. They paused the movie they were watching and the kids all headed upstairs. Jesus wanted to call Lexi, Mariana wanted to no doubt eavesdrop on the conversation and Brandon had a piece he need to work on before dinner was done. With the main course in the oven Callie grabbed the last few item form the fridge to work on dessert. The bottle of brandy that Callie had grabbed would have been concerning to most parents if she didn't have pears on the counter being sliced thinly. With the fruit cut and in the heated pan, Callie added the brandy and stood back when the fire flared up, glazing the pears in the alcohol, but also neutralizing the brandy at the same time.

"Now I know you had to have learned that trick from TV." Sharon poked her head in the kitchen as the fire died down and the pears finished cooing down.

"Well, my mother certainly never taught me any tricks with brandy so yes, this one came from late night Chopped episodes."

"If you keep cooking like this, Stef and I might be out of a job."

"Hardly, cooking is just something I like to do from time to time."

"Well, maybe you can teach Stef how to do the pear trick."

"You just want me to light the food on fire again."

"You got me. Well, I'm going to go wash up and then I might be able to strong arm my grandsons into helping set the table."

"If you can get them to do that, I will be forever in your debt."

"Please, if I really put effort into it, I could get them to do the dishes too." Sharon left the room and Callie smiled and laughed to herself when she heard footsteps running down the stairs.

"Hey Callie, need help setting the table?" Callie turned to her brothers and smiled.

"How did she get you guys to come down here?"

"She told us you lit something on fire." Jesus beamed and Brandon hit his brother on the shoulder.

"If you set the table I can show you the fire trick before dessert."

"Done deal." The boys disappeared with the table settings and Callie laughed. "All that because I lit dessert on fire."


	20. Never Too Late

**Once again, you all have given me the most amazing response to this story. I decided to add one more level of fluff and extended this chapter in two parts and have this chapter be the second part of the dinner. I figure you can never have too much family time. **

With the boys already downstairs helping set up the table, Callie only had to yell that dinner was ready once and all the rest of the Foster clan came trickling down the stairs and to the table. Callie grabbed the baking pan out of the oven and placed it on hot pads in the center of the table and soon added the vegetables that Jude had helped her with earlier. Once all the food was out on the table Callie finally sat down next to Jude and told everyone to dig in. Plates were passed back and forth for a few minutes before everyone had food on their plates and had begun eating.

"Callie, this is amazing, you may be putting momma out of a job." Jesus spoke through a mouth full of food and Callie blushed as Lena feigned offense.

"Close your mouth, chew your food and say that to me again when you need me in the car for your driving lessons." Lena smiled a her son shut his mouth and smiled, trying to charm his way out of the hole he had dug for himself. Everyone else complimented Callie and by the end of the meal it was clear to the teenager that there would be no leftovers. Just as Callie was about to clear the dinner dishes and grab dessert the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it." Sharon stood up and answered the door and when she came back to the table her ex-husband was standing with her.

"Dad." Stef stood up from the table while flashing her mother a questioning glance as if to ask if she had called and invited her father to the house.

"Don't worry, I'm not staying long. Your mother called me and told me that things went well today and I just thought I'd swing by to check in on everyone." Stef had wanted to talk to her father, but not right this minute and not in front of everyone, but she was spared the awkward silence when Callie came back into the room with dessert.

Callie looked up at Frank and offered him a bowl. "Would you like to join us for dessert?" Frank looked to his daughter for permission and Stef nodded her head and sat back down. Brandon grabbed an extra chair for his grandfather and returned to the table. Callie handed Frank a bowl of the dessert and once it was all served up she took her seat and immediately knew that this stand off with Stef and her father would remain if Stef did see her father as the same man who wrote that letter that had been read earlier in court. They ate dessert under the guise that everything was ok and everyone tried to talk over the tension. But even as Callie cleared the dishes she could feel it.

"I wash, you dry?" Callie turned around to see Frank standing in the doorway of the kitchen and the teen smiled and moved over so that two people could stand at the sink.

"Thank you for what you said in that letter." Callie cut straight to the point.

"I was happy to do it. I'm glad it turned out well for everyone."

"She cried when the judge read the letter out loud." Frank stopped for a moment and then kept washing the dish in his hand.

"I think I've made her cry enough over the years, certainly wasn't my intent with that letter."

"She wasn't sad, she was touched by what you said. You stood up for her family and fought for her. That's all any kid ever wants: someone to love them and look them in the eye and say I'm gonna fight like hell to make sure you get the things you deserve."

"You don't think it's too late to say those things?"

"You are both still alive aren't you?" Frank nodded. "Then it's not too late."

"So what about you?" Frank tried to change the subject.

"What about me?"

"Well I figure if you are going to be family we might as well know basic things about each other right?"

"You're a big sports guy aren't you?"

"Sure am, why you like baseball?"

"Not really." Frank sighed and tried to think of where else to take this conversation, but Callie kept talking. "But Jude does." Frank's ears perked up like a dog that heard the front door open.

"I'm pretty sure he knows the entire Padres roster by now." Frank smiled wide.

"Well, maybe next time I get some tickets I'll have him join us, maybe he can convince Brandon to finally come along. Boys day out kind of thing."

"He'd love that."

"And what about you?"

"Baseball was never my sport."

"So what is?"

"Football." Frank looked at the teenager sideways. "What? Girls can like football too."

"I know, your moth…Stef loved football growing up." Frank stopped himself from calling Stef Callie's mother because he wasn't sure if it was the right time to do so. "So you like the Chargers?"

Callie smirked, "like there is any other team to cheer for. They are going to have to get it together and that new head coach has a hard road ahead if he can't teach them how to read dime defense."

"Sounds like I'm going to need to grab us some tickets to their preseason games come August." Callie dried the last dish and smiled.

"I'd like that." Callie heard Jude calling for her from the living room and Frank promised he could put the dishes away and the teenager left. Frank had no idea that his daughter had been listening to the conversation from the doorway of the dinning room.

"So that football game…do I get to come?" Frank turned around to face his daughter.

"I'm sure I can get a hold of three tickets."

"Look dad….the letter you wrote for us. Thank you. Honestly, what you said was really beautiful and it meant a lot to hear those things."

"Too bad it took me this long to say them." Stef made her dad turn around to face her.

"The point is you said them. You swore to a judge that you thought my family mattered and that I deserved these kids. I'll never forget that."

"Like I said, these kids deserve a place to call home and I can't think of a better place to call home then right here. Look, I know I screwed up in every possible way with our relationship, but I didn't want to stand by and watch you fight this alone. I wanted to help."

"And you did. I just wanted to say think you." Frank smiled and looked at his watch mentioning something about getting home and Stef offered to walk him out. When she came back Sharon was standing at the base of the stairs waiting.

"So?"

"It was one dinner mom, we didn't fix every problem, but it was a start."

"Well now I've seen everything. You and your father getting along and another woman in this family that knows football as good as you do. Goodnight dear."

"Night mom." After checking everything downstairs and locking up Stef went upstairs to check on the kids and spend some time with her wife. When she got to the top of the stairs Stef saw Lena standing at the door to Brandon's room and when she went over to ask Lena what she was doing she didn't have to wait long for a response. Lena pointed inside the room where Brandon sat at his keyboard, the twins sat on the bed and Callie sat on the bed with Jude not far from where she sat. Callie was playing her guitar and Brandon was trying to pick up the melody and soon they had synced up and were playing off each other beautifully as Callie started to sing.

**May the angels protect you**

**Trouble neglect you**

**And heaven accept you when its time to go home**

**May you always have plenty**

**Your glass never empty**

**And know in your belly**

**You're never alone**

Callie looked at her baby brother who sat a few feet from her at the edge of the bed and made sure he was hearing the words.

**May your tears come from laughing**

**You find friends worth having**

**With every year passing**

**They mean more than gold**

**May you win but stay humble**

**Smile more than grumble**

**And know when you stumble**

**You're never alone**

**Never alone**

**Never alone**

**I¹ll be in every beat of your heart**

**When you face the unknown**

**Wherever you fly**

**This isn't goodbye**

**My love will follow you stay with you**

**Baby you¹re never alone**

**Well I have to be honest**

**As much as I wanted**

**I'm not gonna promise the cold winds won¹t blow**

**So when hard times have found you**

**And your fears surround you**

**Wrap my love around you**

**You're never alone**

**Never alone**

**Never alone**

**I¹ll be in every beat of your heart**

**When you face the unknown**

**Wherever you fly**

**This isn't goodbye**

**My love will follow you stay with you**

**Baby you¹re never alone**

**May the angels protect you**

**Trouble neglect you**

**And heaven accept you when its time to go home**

**And when hard times have found you**

**And your fear surrounds you**

**Wrap my love around you**

**You¹re never alone**

**Never alone**

**Never alone**

**I¹ll be in every beat of your heart**

**When you face the unknown**

**Wherever you fly**

**This isn't goodbye**

**My love will follow you stay with you**

**Baby you¹re never alone**

**My love will follow you **

**Stay with you**

**Baby you're never alone**

Stef had to smile because these moments of complete peace were rare with nothing but teenagers living in the house and Callie always seemed to have another battle to fight, but for that one moment all her children were safe and happy and that was more than enough.

**Ok, so I personally can't stand the Chargers or the Padres, but that is based solely on me being raised an SF sports fan since birth. If they are your teams, that's cool with me and honestly if they can beat the Dodgers more power to you because my team isn't gonna do it this year. But anyway, hopefully you all liked this little extra fluff and don't worry I'm not going to dive right into angst again. I have some family/sibling chapters in mind…then the angst will return. Let me know what you all thought.**


	21. Push Till It Hurts

**So I'm going to use this chapter to begin to explore the moms trying to get Callie the help she needs. It shouldn't be all that angst ridden, but anytime this topic is involved it's bound to come up.**

A few days later Sharon had left her daughter's house and everyone was back in their own rooms and was enjoying their summer. Lena was finishing admission paperwork in the dining room while Stef was in the living room on the phone with someone who seemed to be giving her important information as she was writing in a notebook as she spoke. Eventually the phone call ended and Stef joined her wife in the dining room.

"Must have been some phone call, you've been on the phone for more than an hour."

"It was a series of phone calls, but I got what I was after."

"Which was?" Stef held her phone out to her wife and it was open to the calendar app. "A psychiatrist appointment for Callie for this afternoon."

"That's pretty short notice isn't it?"

"This doctor had a cancelation and when I called she offered it to me. Any idea where Callie is, I want to give her enough time to get ready."

"She and Brandon were working on a song in his room last I checked." Stef headed up the staircase and didn't even have to make it Brandon's room before she knew that he and Callie were in fact working on a song. Stef stood in the doorway, not that it mattered of course. She could have stood right behind the two teens and they never would have noticed her there, they were too focused on the song. This time it wasn't Callie playing her guitar, but instead it was Brandon playing the piano with Callie next to him singing.

**My mother bought it secondhand from a silent movie star **

**It was out of tune but still I learned to play **

**And with each note we both would smile forgetting who we are **

**And all the pain would simply fly away **

**Something secondhand and broken still can make a pretty sound **

**Even if it doesn't have a place to live **

**Oh, the words were left unspoken when my Mama came around **

**But that Secondhand White Baby Grand still had something beautiful to give **

**Through missing keys and broken strings the music was our own **

**Until the day we said our last goodbyes **

**The baby grand was sent away **

**A child all alone, to pray somebody else would realize **

**That something secondhand and broken still can make a pretty sound **

**Even if it doesn't have a place to live **

**Oh, the words are still unspoken now that Mama's not around **

**But that Secondhand White Baby Grand still has something beautiful to give **

**For many years the music had to roam **

**Until we found a way to find a home **

Callie got noticeably chocked up and her singing became tearful, but she had an honest smile spread wide across her face and she pushed on.

**So now I wake up every day and see her standing there **

**Just waiting for a partner to compose **

**And I wish my mother still could hear that sound beyond compare **

**I'll play her song till everybody knows **

**That something secondhand and broken still can make a pretty sound **

**Don't we all deserve a family room to live **

**Oh, the words can't stay unspoken until everyone has found **

**That Secondhand White Baby Grand that still has something beautiful to give **

**I still have something beautiful to give**

Callie brushed tears out of her eyes and Brandon kissed the side of Callie's forehead as he let the last note die out. Stef knocked and took a step into the room as both teens turned around.

"So grandma was right, we are only a few members away from having our own Foster family band."

"Callie was just helping me practice." Stef turned to Callie and watched her blush.

"Well, I actually came up here to look for Callie, mind if I steal her away for a few minutes?"

"Sure, I'll just go do something downstairs." Brandon couldn't even come up with a good excuse to leave his own room.

"Don't be silly, you shouldn't have to leave your own room. Besides I have the feeling I'm not gonna like this conversation." Callie mumbled the last part to Brandon and got up form her seat, leading Stef out of Brandon's room and into her own. Callie sat on the edge of her own bed and Stef took a seat on Mariana's.

"You are running out of bad news to tell me, so I'm not sure what I should be preparing myself for." Callie had a point, bad news had a bad habit of following her around, but Stef hoped that the teen would at least listen to what she had to say.

"Well, I just wanted to give you a heads up, I made you an appointment with a therapist for this afternoon." Callie wasn't sure she was supposed to say or feel and that conflict played across her face.

"It'll be ok sweets, we just want to get you the best help available. Lena and I aren't very well versed in this issue and we agree that we need some outside help."

"What time is the appointment?" Callie managed to speak, but all she could come up with was that question.

"2:30, Lena and I will take you because she wants to meet with us and you for the intake session."

"So you're going to hear what I tell the shrink. I thought that was supposed to be confidential."

"It is and it will be, we only are in the room with you for the last part of the session when the doctor wants to talk to all of us about a treatment plan and ways we can keep you safe."

"Is she going to make me stop?" Stef stood up and went over to Callie's bed, taking the seat next to her.

"Honey, no one can make you do anything. We can't make you stop cutting, but we can give you all the support you need to make the decision to stop on your own." Callie looked down at her arm which for the first time in days didn't have a bandage on it and Stef noticed the all too familiar far away look Callie had in her eye.

"What if it doesn't work?" Stef took Callie's hand in her own and tried to soothe the teenager.

"Then we keep trying until we find something that does." Callie nodded her understanding and Stef stood up from the bed.

"We'll leave around 1:30 because there is paperwork we have to fill out and some that she needs you to fill out." Callie looked at the clock and knew she had a few hours to get ready for her appointment. She took a quick shower and finished getting dressed before returning to her bedroom and sitting on the edge of her bed. She was pretty certain that she was alone, but soon she felt like someone was watching her. She was expecting Jude or maybe Stef, but instead it was Mariana.

"Mind if I come in?"

"It's your room too."

"I know, but you look like you are deep in thought, didn't want to interrupt."

"It's fine, just mentally preparing myself; I'm being dragged to a therapist appointment."

"What, like you don't think your qualify for needing therapy?" Mariana smiled and Callie snorted a laugh. Mariana wasn't making fun of Callie; she was trying to provide some sisterly bickering and put Callie's mind at ease.

"It's not that, I just…shrinks and I don't really mix."

"Ever think that maybe you just had shitty shrinks. No sense in making this one out to be a monster before you even meet her."

"How'd you get to be so wise on the matter?"

"I may not ever know what it's like to have lived through the things you have and I'll never know what drove you to cutting, but I know a lot about not trusting people. Blindly believing that everyone is going to hurt you is a great way to protect yourself, but it's also the recipe for a lonely life. Yeah, you'll protect yourself from the bad guys, but at the same time, you'll prevent yourself from ever letting the good people in."

"Well up until recently, I haven't had any good people to let in."

"I get that, but that isn't the case anymore. You have lots of people who love you and moms just want you to be happy and feel safe and if you are still cutting then you aren't happy or safe. They just want to help."

"I just don't want to let them down."

"Only way you would ever let them down is if you gave up on yourself and didn't even give this a chance." Mariana grabbed her computer that she had originally come into the room to retrieve and moved to leave the room.

"Just be honest, besides, what's the worst that could happen? You figure out a better way to cope and stop hurting yourself. Would that really be so bad?"

Callie didn't know what to say to that question because a part of her wanted to scream yes, it would be awful. However, the other part of her wanted to be able to say that she put this problem behind her forever. Her internal struggle was interrupted when Lena came in to tell her they had to leave in 20 minutes. Callie put on a different shirt and grabbed a few random things from her bedside table and tossed them in her bag and headed downstairs. The car ride was brief as the doctor's office was only about 15 minutes from the house. Callie was thankful for the limited time spent in the car, mostly because it was the definition of a deafening silence. Once they checked in with the front desk receptionist Stef was handed a few sheets of paper to fill out with Callie's information. At the same time she handed Callie a different set of papers that mostly consisted of boxes Callie would check if something applied to her. As Lena and Stef worked on their set of paperwork, Callie plugged in her earphones and went to work on her own. Eventually Stef was done with her paperwork and after she handed it back to the woman behind the desk she returned to her seat only to see Callie still working on her own. Lena and Stef shared a look that was a mix of concern and genuine interest. They watched out of the corner of their eye as Callie checked off most of the boxes on the first page before turning it over. When Callie was done she handed the papers to the same woman and resumed her seat next to Stef and Lena. Not more than five minutes later a woman walked out of the office the was positioned behind the front desk and after being handed the papers that both Callie and Stef had just filled out she made her way over to where the three women sat.

"Sorry for the wait ladies, had to handle some paperwork in my office. Now which one of you is Stef?" Stef held out her hand to the doctor and shook the doctor's hand.

"That would be me, thank you so much for getting us in today."

"Not a problem. And if you're Stef, then that must make you Lena." Lena shook the doctor's hand as well and introduced herself briefly. The doctor turned to Callie and smiled.

"That must mean that you are Callie. I'm Dr. Turner." Callie looked the doctor up and down before letting the woman shake her hand. Callie thought to herself that seemed nice and even though they had just met Callie was almost positive that this woman would be worth trusting.

"If it's ok with you, I'm going to have your foster moms join us for a few minutes and then you and I can talk alone." Callie nodded and followed the doctor into her office and took a seat on a chair in the corner of the room, while Stef and Lena took a seat next to each other on the sofa.

"Alright ladies, Stef told me a little bit about what brought you all in today when we spoke on the phone earlier, but I just wanted to lay out some general points or ground rules before Callie and I actually start talking." Dr. Turner turned to Callie who wasn't making eye contact with anyone and she spoke directly to the teen.

"Regardless of whether Callie and I only talk for today or if we have a longstanding interaction, I have one very basic rule. No lying." Callie looked up and made eye contact with the doctor who seemed pleased that she finally had the teen's attention.

"And that rule goes both ways. I will not lie to you and I ask that you don't lie to me. Even if the truth isn't pretty or you think I'll get upset, I want you to tell me. Deal?" Callie nodded her head, "Deal."

"Good. Now rule number two is less of a rule and more of a law regarding confidentiality."

"That means you can't tell other people what I tell you." Callie understood that much about therapy and she wanted to make sure that was what she was going to experience here."

"That's right, but there is what I like to call fine print on that rule Callie. If you come in here one day and tell me that you're suicidal or I think you are in danger of hurting someone else then I'm obligated by state law to break that confidentiality. Same thing goes if you come in here and I think you're getting abused or someone is otherwise hurting you."

"Bit late for that." Callie mumbled her response under her breath, but the doctor heard it and nodded her head.

"I now, but if it ever happens again, I operate under similar rules that your moms do. Ok?"

"Ok." The doctor looked over to Lena and Stef.

"Is there anything that I can answer for the two of you before I do some one on one work with Callie?"

"I think we're both just a little concerned with everything that's gone on the last few weeks. Callie's been through a lot and this is an issue that neither Stef or I are very familiar with so we really don't know how best to support her." Lena spoke for both of them while Stef just seemed to nod in agreement.

"You have every right and reason to be concerned, it's scary when your child hurts themselves and it's something most parents are completely unprepared to handle. Coming here was a good step. I work with many young people with similar issue with cutting and I think coming here will provide Callie with another line of support and help you as a family start to cope with what has happened."

"What about keeping things in the house that are sharp?" Stef had been hiding the razors in the house for almost a week and she wasn't sure if she should hide more. Callie became noticeably tense and Dr. Turner saw her clenched jaw and rigid stance, telling her that hiding the sharp objects would only push Callie to a point of desperation.

"I get that question a lot from parents and the answer changes depending on the child. Look at Callie." Stef turned toward Callie and saw what the doctor saw moments before.

"Even you just mentioning the idea that someone might take those things away is causing her a large amount of anxiety. Now I am not saying that you should stock your bathroom with packages of razors or buy a new knife set for the kitchen, but what I am saying is that in Callie's situation I fear that it would do more harm than good. When a cutter, especially a seasoned cutter is faced with their tools being taken from them, they are literally thrown into a state of panic and they will likely do anything to make a new cut and I mean anything. They get desperate and when that happens, they get sloppy and that's when trips to the ER happen."

"So what do we do then?" Stef was terrified at the mention of a hospital trip being needed and she wanted answers.

"Let me talk to Callie for a bit and before you leave, we can discuss the best way to make Callie feel safe at home." Lena and Stef nodded and made their way back out into the waiting room. Dr. Turner shut the door behind them and resumed her seat.

"You can sit on the couch if you want, that chair isn't the most comfortable thing."

"I'm fine, thank you."

"If you sit in a corner nothing can surprise you, you can see the door, the window and me." Callie smirked a little at the doctor. This woman knew more about Callie's behavior then Callie herself was conscious of.

"Well, Callie, usually I use those papers you filled out as a way to start things off, but considering what you checked off I think it might be best for you to tell me where you want to start."

"I haven't been in therapy in a long time, I don't really know where to start." Dr. Turner smiled and looked at the paper in front of her.

"Well, a good place to start is maybe telling me the things you don't want to talk about. That way we know what topics to avoid."

"Nice try doc, but if I tell you may list of no-go topics that is the first thing that you are going to want to talk about."

"Callie, this isn't a game of me trying to outsmart you or put you through the ringer. You have a lot of major things to work through and I don't want to waste our time on things that you aren't ready to discuss." That made sense to Callie and as much as she hated it she relented and listed off things she didn't want to discuss.

"I don't want to talk my dad."

"Can I ask if he's alive?"

"I hope not and that's all I want to say about him."

"Fair enough. Anything else you want to avoid?" Callie had a thousand thoughts in her head, but she couldn't force herself to actually say them out loud so she just shook her head no.

"You strike me as someone who doesn't like to beat around the bush so if it's alright with you I want to jump right in."

"That's fine."

"Good. Now this isn't the first time you've cut yourself, can you remember the first time you did?"

"Yeah." Callie could remember it like it happened last week.

"Can you remember how old you were when you started or what led you to it?"

"I was 11 I think, maybe 12."

"So you were very young?"

"Yeah, I guess. We had been in that foster home for about a month and they certainly weren't that worst family we ever stayed with, but just because they didn't beat us didn't make them saints."

"Tell me what you mean by that."

"Bruises heal, cuts scar over, broken bones mend, but being ignored and neglected…that cuts deep and you never get over someone just absolutely not giving a damn."

"So for you the neglect hurt more than the actual physical abuse?"

"At least if they hurt me I knew they knew I existed."

"You started to associate pain or being hurt as your connection to reality."

"I never really thought of it like that, but yeah I guess so. It wasn't just Jude and I either; they did it with their bio kids too. That's how I started cutting."

"Was one of the kids a cutter at the time?" Callie nodded her head.

"Their eldest daughter had been doing it for years. I caught her one night and she offered to teach me how. She didn't mean anything by it, she just knew were both in the same fucked up situation and she showed me how she usually dealt with it."

"Have you ever tried stopping?"

"I can go for a few months, three is usually my breaking point."

"How long had it been when you cut last week?"

"A while, I was in juvie before I moved in with the Fosters so there was nothing for me to use there that wouldn't have gotten me in a lot of trouble."

"So you stopped cutting for longer than your usual three months?"

"Yeah, but not by choice. I was forced to stop."

"What about now? No one is forcing you to stop are they?"

"You don't get it." Callie bit back and placed her head in her hands trying to soothe herself by rocking slightly in the chair.

"Then explain it to me Callie." Callie had never met a therapist that was going to stand toe to toe with her and make her really wrestle with her demons and so she had no way to answer the doctor other than by telling her the truth

"When I do it I can breathe. I don't have to be a victim of anything anymore. I get to control my pain and no one can hurt me."

"No one can hurt you any worse than you can hurt yourself, is that it."

"Everyone else got to control when I felt pain. When I cut, I get to control what kind of pain I feel, how bad it hurts, everything, I get to control every single aspect of that pain."

"What kind of pain were you trying to control the other night?"

"Everything from the trial was just too much."

"Having to relive what happened to you must have been extremely difficult for you."

"It wasn't talking about the rape that made me cut."

"What did?"

"That stupid fucking lawyer brought up the time I tried to kill myself when I was 13 and I just…"

"It brought up those feelings again?"

"Yes, and I just thought if I did it once I could walk away from it, but I couldn't because…" Callie stopped herself before she said it, but Dr. Turner pushed the teenager.

"Because why Callie?"

"Because if I give it up then I give up my control and all that old pain will come back and I'll start getting hurt again."

"You think your foster moms would hurt you?"

"No, not them, never them."

"Then who?"

"I don't know. I always thought I could see it in people, that evil that you can see. But I always missed it in the people who hurt me the most. Sometimes the devil really does have a pretty face."

"People who were supposed to love you hurt you the most, like you foster families?"

"If there was a God. I would spit in his face for subjecting me to this. If there was a Devil, I would sell my soul to make it end." Callie spit out the passage from a book she had read like it was a mantra and Dr. Turner could see that they weren't going to get any further in their work that day. She made a few notes in her file and set it off to the side.

"Callie, you did a lot of really hard work today so I think we're gonna call it a day ok?" Callie nodded her head, trying to hide her crying, but being completely unsuccessful at doing so. Callie was trying to calm herself down, but nothing was working and she wasn't hearing anything the doctor said.

"Callie, do you want me to bring your moms back in?" Callie wasn't sure if she wanted them to see her like this, but then again they had seen her but naked with blood pouring down her arm so how much worse could it get. Callie managed to nod her head and she could hear the doctor stand up and walk over to her door. She never left the room, but instead stood at the door waiting for Stef and Lena come walk back into the office. When they did Lena looked at the doctor.

"So I take it things didn't go well?"

"On the contrary." Lena looked over to Callie who was still trying to stop crying and then back to Dr. Turner.

"Mrs. Foster I know that it doesn't look like it, but Callie made a lot of headway today. With this kind of issue and the emotions behind it, the therapy is largely focused on pushing on the wound till it hurts." Lena looked over to Stef who was kneeling in front of Callie trying to get her to talk to her about what was happening in her head.

"Callie, honey look at me please." Callie lifted her head just enough to see genuine concern written across Stef's face.

"There's my girl." Callie's tears welled up with tears all over again and all she managed to say was I'm sorry over and over again. Eventually, Callie just fell forward out of her seat and wrapped her arms around Stef. Dr. Turner was right, they had pushed on the wound until it hurt and that was what Callie was crying about. She was finally forced to face the reality behind her cutting and it terrified her, just as much as it did her foster mothers. Lena kept talking to the doctor about the next step in treatment and what they could be doing at home to help Callie. Stef stayed on the floor with Callie and after about 15 minutes she had seemed to calm down enough to speak.

"Can we go home now?"

"We absolutely can." Stef helped Callie off the floor and after making another appointment with Dr. Turner the three of them headed home. When they walked into the front door the house was pretty quiet, meaning that not all the kids were home. Brandon was practicing his music and it could be heard from downstairs and within a few minutes of the front door closing Jude was downstairs looking for his sister. Stef pointed to the backyard where the teenager had retreated the second they were back at the house. Both she and Lena watched as Jude went over to his sister and took a seat next to her on the grass.

"So what do we do now?" Stef asked out loud. Lena looked at Callie and Jude sitting on the grass, clearly not doing anything but sitting in silence and she took a deep breath before responding.

"We are going to push on the wound until it hurts."

**Alright folks, I have my first day of school tomorrow and it's the beginning of my second year of grad school. My days are about to become epically busy, but I have a two-hour break between classes on Tuesdays and a long train ride home from work to write so just stick with me. And as always, let me know what you think in reviews**.


	22. Rise And Rise Again

**So this is essentially a filler chapter because I don't want every single chapter to be about the cutting. That kind of storyline needs some room to breathe, but don't worry it will be moved forward. This chapter will mention the cutting, but I wanted to throw this in there for some variety.**

Once she had calmed down, Callie had come back into the house and was upstairs in her room, letting Mariana try to talk her into going shopping with her. They were still in the middle of that debate when Lena came upstairs and asked for them to come downstairs and help set up for dinner. As Mariana helped throw a salad together, Callie started grabbing the things needed to set the table and as she reached for the silverware Mariana caught a glimpse of the most recent cuts on Callie's arm.

"What are you gonna do when they heal?"

"Mariana." Lena snapped at Mariana and the teenager just shrugged her shoulders.

"What, we're just supposed to pretend that she didn't hurt herself." Callie stepped in and essentially called Lena off the defense.

"It's ok. I have huge cuts on my arm, it would be way weirder if she ignored them and pretended that everything was normal." Callie looked over to Mariana.

"I don't know what I'll do yet. It depends on how well they heal. But they are pretty deep and more than likely should have had stitches when I did them. When they heal, they'll be visible. Not much I can do about that." Callie caught the guilty look on Lena's face and she quickly tried to reassure her.

"Don't feel bad, please. If you had taken me to the ER they would have taken one look at my arm and I would still be sitting the psych ward being forced fed Lithium and Zoloft until I couldn't remember my first name."

"They seriously do that?" Mariana was now just asking out of morbid curiosity and because she really did care about Callie.

"That's how it happened last time I was in the hospital. They were giving me enough meds to sedate a grown man, imagine what they were doing to a 13 year old girl."

"How'd you get out?"

"I tunneled my way out with a spoon." Mariana laughed at Callie's joke and the tension in the room was reduced.

"Eventually they had to let me go. I was so doped up on meds I wasn't a threat to anyone, myself least of all, and during my moments of lucidity I just told them what they wanted to hear."

"That sucks."

"Yeah it did. All the more reason that I'm glad we avoided it this time. I'd rather deal with the scars when they heal."

"Won't you have to hide them, like to get a job and stuff?" Callie thought about it for a minute and smiled.

"Honestly, if I cover them at all it'll probably be with a tattoo." Lena dropped the utensil she had in her hand and turned around to face her children.

"Not until you are 18 missy." Callie held her hands up in fake surrender.

"I swear. Besides it's not going to be anything bad."

"What do you want to get?" Mariana was now all ears in this conversation.

"To cover the one on my arms, I'm not sure yet. The ones one my back are a different story."

"You have scars on your back?" Mariana didn't realize that she had stumbled into a bit of a dark conversation.

"I have scars just about everywhere, but yes I have quite a few on my back." Mariana looked like she felt terrible for asking the question and Callie saw her struggle to change the subject, but the poor girl didn't know how.

"Rise and rise again until lambs become lions."

"What?"

"That's the tattoo I want on my back." Lena listened as the girls talked and set the table.

"What does it mean?" Callie smiled and explained the quote.

"It means never give up."

"It suits you, but won't having visible tats make job hunting hard?"

"Depends on what job you are hunting for. For what I want to do, it shouldn't matter." Lena came into the dinning room and jumped into their conversation.

"And what is it that you want to do?" Lena had never heard Callie talk much about her future and she was positive she knew why, but if Callie had a goal in mind Lena was of course interested. Like she expected Callie hesitated with her answer, like saying it out loud would make it not come true.

"I haven't really planned anything out yet, just thinking about some options."

"Well just don't do anything that is going to keep your dear old mothers up all night worrying ok?" Lena said as she went back into the kitchen, which meant she missed the stunned look on Callie's face. Lena was joking, but she had inadvertently shocked Callie in two ways. Callie knew Jude had started calling Stef and Lena any variation of mom, but she didn't realize until just then that it was ok for her to do the same. Mariana caught the stunned expression on Callie's face and when she was sure her mother couldn't hear her she asked.

"You are totally going to get a job that makes them worry aren't you?"

"What, no, why would you think that?"

"Don't kid a kidder Callie, I know the face of someone who just got backed into a corner. Relax, I won't tell moms, but you can totally trust me if you want."

"It's not that I don't trust you, I just haven't thought it all the way through yet and I want to be sure it's what I want you know."

"I got you sister. And don't worry; moms will get over it, whatever it is. They just want us to do something that makes us happy." Their conversation was cut off when Stef got back from getting some work done at the office and the family gathered for dinner. The normal dinnertime conversations split off from there and Callie was once again thankful that after an eventful day she was not the center of attention and could simple enjoy her family.

**I know it was short, but like I said, I needed to work it in there. I already know where I am taking Callie's job in the future idea, but any guesses or suggestions are welcome cuz maybe you all will have an idea I like better than my own. It will be a while before we get to that point anyway. Otherwise, just let me know your thoughts and I will update it soon.**


	23. Running Out Of Bad News

**Ok so I would buckle up for this one guys, cuz I'm about to bring the angst…you know again.**

With a good chunk of their summer break already gone, the kids all decided they should take advantage of the three weeks they had left before school started up again. On this day in particular Brandon had driven the whole group of them to the local movie theater and they watched the latest action film. On the way home the twins were in the backseat talking with Jude about their favorite parts of the movie, while Callie was up front staring out the window daydreaming. As they neared the house Callie was shaken back into reality when she saw a squad car parked outside of the house, which by itself was not strange as she knew Stef had been at work that morning, but the car parked behind it caused her mind to race. As they parked the car in the driveway Callie was first out of the car and first to walk through the front door. Lena and Stef were sitting in the living room with two uniformed officers and standing off to the side was Bill. Before Callie could react the rest of the kids walked in and immediately knew something was up. Bill took a step towards Callie and she held up her hand, stopping him in his tracks.

"Jude, go upstairs." There was an eerie calmness to Callie's voice and the look she had in her eyes told her foster mothers that she had a very good idea what her social worker was doing here. Her little brother appeared at her side and appeared to want to stay.

"I'm not leaving you." Callie looked at him and the two of them just stared at each other for a little while until Jude eventually sighed in defeat and began to ascend the stairs. Callie looked at the twins and Brandon and tilted her head towards the stairs indicating that she needed them to leave too, if for no other reason to keep Jude busy. They all complied and when the bedroom doors shut upstairs Callie took a few steps until she was toe to toe with Bill.

"You are running out of bad news to tell me Bill."

"I know. Callie listen…" Callie held up her hand again and looked Bill square in the eye and after a moment she spoke again.

"He's dead isn't he?" Bill looked dumbstruck and so did Stef and Lena who both knew what was going on.

"Not yet."

"What do you mean not yet?" There was enough venom in her voice to scare anyone in the room, but Bill explained.

"He's dying Callie, your father is dying." Stef saw a familiar fire get lit in Callie's eyes and she knew what was about to come from Bill using the word father.

"He is NOT my anything. He picked drugs over his wife and children and walked out the front door leaving a three year old and his wife who I bet he didn't know was pregnant. Fathers don't do that Bill, assholes do that. He is biologically responsible for half of my DNA and that is it. He is NOT my father." Bill backed off a little bit and one of the officers sitting in the room stood up.

"Ms. Jacob, I'm one of the officers that was called to the scene when your father was found."

"Why were you called in at all?"

"He collapsed in a public place and some people walking by called 911."

"I'm still really lost as to why you needed to come out here to tell me all this." Callie was waiting for an explanation and the officer kept talking.

"When they evaluated your…Mr. Jacob at the hospital he eventually regained consciousness and when we asked if he had any living relatives he said your mother's name. When we ran her through the computer we found out she was no longer alive, but that she had two children who were currently in the system."

"So he figured you'd come knocking at a 16 year old's door looking for what sympathy, money, what?"

"He's asking for you Callie." Bill took over the talking and with good reason, Callie was getting mad and he was the only one who ever really saw her this level of angry.

"Asking for me?" Callie laughed at the very thought that her father would ask anything of her. "You go back to him and tell him that unless hell froze over today he is in no position to be asking for anything from me. Tell him I hope he rots."

"Callie, easy." Stef tried to calm Callie down before she lost it. She knew Callie had every right to be angry, but they had just got the teenager to a good place in her life and this was threatening to undo all of it.

"No, I won't take it easy. He abandoned us because drugs meant more to him than his family. He should have been there when she died. He should have been there to take care of his children. He should have been there to bury his wife. Instead I had to do it. He should have been there to make sure we didn't get shipped off to every single shitty foster home in San Diego. It took 8 years to find a family and it will be a very cold day in hell when I let that miserable son of a bitch ruin what it took years for us to find."

Callie had tears running down her face and was practically shaking she was so mad. She couldn't hear anything the adults were saying and the only thing she could recognize was the feeling of Stef holding her and that was enough to push her to lose all composure. Lena took the uniformed officers outside and Bill followed, leaving the living room empty except for Stef and Callie. Stef had seen Callie cry plenty since she first arrived in their home, but this time was the first time she ever saw Callie cry out of raw anger. Her cries alternated between sobs that had no noise and were more gasps of air and sobs that consisted of her screaming into Stef's shoulder. Stef figured that Jesus must have drawn the short straw because in the middle of trying to comfort Callie the 15 year old poked his head in the living room. His mother saw him and offered a tearful smile before indicating that he needed to go back upstairs. In perhaps his most brazen act of defiance, he instead walked into the living room and leaned over Callie as she remained wrapped up in Stef's arms. Stef watched in dead silence as her son leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss on Callie's forehead. Callie turned her head just enough to see Jesus standing above her with a sympathetic look on his face.

"Anyone who willingly walked away from you, never deserved to love you in the first place." Stef wasn't sure where that very poignant piece of wisdom came from, but she was thankful for anything that forced Callie to stay rooted in reality rather than in her own anger.

"He has no right." Jesus shook his head in agreement with Callie.

"You're right, he has no right to try to come back into your life. You want me to kick his ass for you?" Callie remained wrapped up in Stef, but for a brief moment she looked at Jesus with a shocked expression.

"Don't look so shocked. As far as I'm concerned anyone who makes my big sister cry is asking for an ass whopping."

Callie sat up slightly and sniffled. "He's not worth it." Jesus looked around the living room and excused himself for a minute. When he came back he was holding a hand mirror from the downstairs bathroom. He handed the mirror to Callie and forced her to hold it up to her own face.

"Say it again."

"Say what again?"

"He isn't worth it." Callie looked at herself in the mirror and forced her mind to ignore her tear stained face and her flushed cheeks.

"He isn't worth it." Callie said it softly.

"Again." Stef watched in fascination as Jesus held the mirror firmly in place and demanded that Callie repeat the phrase again.

"He isn't worth it." This time she said it louder.

"Make me believe it, come on."

"He isn't worth it." Callie all but yelled it and that time she shut her eyes and looked away from the mirror. Jesus put the mirror down on the table and gently redirected Callie's gaze so that she was looking him in the eye.

"Listen to your own words. He isn't worth it. He's an idiot. He'd have to be. Anyone who held you in his arms and didn't see immediately how wonderful you are is clearly insane." Callie buried her face in her hands and shook her head.

"He's dying. He is dying and he wants to see me and I don't know what to do."

"What do you want to do?" Callie thought about it for a second and answered.

"I want him to die alone and feel exactly what I felt when he decided we weren't worth it to stay."

"Totally valid thing to want. So why the conflict then?" Callie knew Jesus was trying to make a point and she could see it coming from his line of questions.

"Because another part of me wants to look him in the eye and tell him I'm pissed and that he walked on two kids not just one. I just don't know which one I want more."

"Maybe it has nothing to do with wanting it more."

"What do you mean?"

"You said it yourself Callie, he's dying. If you try your hardest to make him feel hurt, he's only gonna feel it for a little bit and then he'll be gone. Don't pick the option that is going to hurt him the most; pick the option that helps you the most. Your peace of mind might be worth a little bit more than your pride. Just something to think about. We'll back you no matter what." Jesus stood up and gestured upstairs. "What do want me to tell Jude?"

"Tell him, I'll be up in a minute and that I'm ok." Jesus nodded and left the room, once again leaving Callie and Stef alone.

"Do you want me and Lena to talk to him instead?" Callie shook her head and took a deep breath.

"I have to be the one to do it."

"No you don't. Remember what I told you? You don't have to be the adult here anymore Callie. We may not know this situation like you, but we're the adults here, not you. Believe it or not we might actually be able to help."

Callie let out the breath she was holding. "I want to tell him, but I don't want to do it by myself." Stef nodded her head and kissed Callie's forehead as she stood up from the couch. "We can talk to him together then, once Lena finishes outside."

"Did they tell you how long he has?" Stef nodded her head.

"He in the final stages of organ failure Callie, there is an 80% chance he won't live through the night."

"Great so I need to make a decision within the next 12 hours."

"I know it's unfair, but Jesus is right. Whatever you decide, you have our support, so you make a decision that you can live with ok, not one that other people would approve of." Callie nodded and before Stef could join her wife on the front porch Lena came back into the house.

"Bill gave me the information for the hospital if she decides she wants to go." Lena handed the paper with the information on it to Stef and after a moment of silence Callie stood up from the couch and paused in front of them at the base of the stairs.

"If this is time sensitive we better go talk to him now."

"Lead the way." Callie started up the stairs with both her mothers trailing behind her. None of them knew what to expect and none of them had a plan as to what they should say, but that didn't seem to stop any of them from walking into Jude and Jesus' room and shutting the door behind them.

**Ok, so basically I hit you all over the head with angst and I'm not even that sorry for it. I was originally going to have the dad be dead already, but I thought this gave a chance for some character growth and a chance for the moms to step in an take the parenting controls away form Callie a little bit. A lot of you mentioned having that moment when Callie calls Lena and Stef mom or some variation of mom and I am working on that idea now. Also, someone mentioned having a chapter that was focused on Lena and Stef's POV as everything in the family goes down and I think that's a great idea. Chances are I will work that in either in the next chapter or the one after it. Thanks for all the kind words everyone, hope this lived up to expectations.**


	24. The Things He Left Behind

Even though Callie was the first one up the stairs, she waited for both Stef and Lena to be behind her before she knocked on Jude and Jesus' bedroom door. Brandon opened the door to them and after letting them in he quietly took his leave. Jude was sitting on his bed and once everyone was in the room he looked up at his sister with an expression that even Callie couldn't place.

"How much did you hear?"

"You can yell really loud." Callie looked down and away, slightly mad at herself for losing control that badly. She sat down next to her brother on the bed.

"I'm sorry you heard all that."

"Is he really gonna die?"

"That's what I have been told, yes." Both siblings sat there in silence and their mothers debated when to step in, but just as Lena was about to say something Jude wordlessly reached over and grabbed his sister's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Callie blinked back tears, but said nothing.

"I'm sorry he walked out on you." Callie shook her head and looked at her brother.

"He walked out on you too buddy, he just didn't know it yet. I as only 3 and mom was just barely pregnant with you."

"Why'd he leave?" Stef and Lean quickly got the idea that Callie never told Jude much about their father or what drove him to leave.

"He was sick." Was the only response Callie offered and sensing that she didn't really know what else to say, Lena knelt down next to Jude's bed and tried to explain.

"Honey, you know how sometimes when Stef is at work she arrests people who sell drugs?" Jude nodded his head.

"Well, your dad had a drug problem and that led him to make some very poor decisions."

"Like leaving Callie and mom when she was pregnant with me?"

"Yes. So when Callie says that he was sick, that's what she means."

"How come the police officers were here?" Jude looked to his sister this time for an answer.

"He wants to see me before he dies."

"Are you gonna go?"

"Yes I am." Callie surprised herself by saying yes and Stef and Lena were just as surprised that she had agreed to indulge her father's wish to see her before his death.

"Do I have to go with you?" Callie put her anger aside for a moment and reminded herself that Jude was caught in a very unique situation.

"You don't have to go anywhere you don't want to go. I'm only going because I have something I need to get off my chest. I'm not going there to comfort him or make him feel better. I'm going there to say my peace and that's it. If you want to come with me, you can, but if you don't want to you can absolutely stay home."

"You're going alone?" Callie shook her head.

"No, not alone. If you decide you want to stay here, Stef will stay here with you and Lena will come to the hospital with me." Lena looked a little surprised to be the one Callie would want to have with her during this trip to her father's deathbed, but she and Stef just nodded their heads as Callie spoke.

"Do you think he would have stayed if he had known mom was pregnant with me?" Callie cursed her father in her head for ever making Jude think that him leaving could have someone been prevented.

"Jude, what Lena said is true. People with drug problems, sometimes they make really bad decisions and they hurt the people who they are supposed to love the most. He was so caught up in his addiction that he couldn't see what he was doing to the people around him. And when people get like that, they have to want to save themselves before other people can actually help. There was nothing any of us could have done to save him or get him to stay." Jude nodded his head, though Callie doubted that he was fully embracing all she had said to him.

"I want to stay here." Callie breathed a sigh of relief, because truthfully she didn't want her brother to be involved in this anymore than he already was. Callie got up off the bed and started to leave the room to get dressed to leave the house, but Jude called her back.

"Are you gonna tell him about me?" Lena and Stef could both see the anger play across Callie's face. She wasn't mad at Jude, she was mad at their dad. She turned around and went back over to where Jude still sat. She brushed her hand through his hair and kissed the top of his forehead.

"I am absolutely going to tell him about you. He's gonna hear about the amazing little boy you were and the young man you're growing up to be. And before he leaves this earth for good, I promise you he will know that they day he drove away he left two children behind, not just one." Jude gave his sister another hug before he finally let her go get ready. Stef stayed in the room with him while Lena followed Callie into her own bedroom. Callie put her hair up in a ponytail and started searching for her hoodie as Lena waited for her chance to say something.

"If you want to eat something before we leave I can wait." Callie interrupted Lena's train of thought and the older woman shook her head.

"No, it's fine, we can leave as soon as you're ready. Callie?" The teen paused her actions and looked at Lena as if to wait for her to continue.

"Not that I'm not happy to go with you, but…"

"Why did I want you to come with me instead of Stef?" Lena nodded and Callie had to smile a little at the question.

"I thought it would be obvious. When grandma was still here she told me that if she didn't know any better that she would guess that Stef and I were blood related because we act so similar and have similar patterns of behavior and thought. If that's true then her coming with me would be a bad idea."

"Bad idea how?"

"I don't remember much about my dad, but I remember things my mother told me about him and needless to say she didn't have great things to say. He may be dying, but chances are he's still going to act like an asshole and if he says something out of order I'm going to shut it down real fast. And if Stef and I are so much alike she'd be mad too and I can only imagine that her reaction would be amplified because I'm her…" Callie stopped herself before she said the word child, but Lena caught the momentary pause and she took the opportunity to say the word Callie feared saying.

"Her child." Lena walked over and wrapped her arms around Callie gently pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Well, I can't promise you I'll be any calmer if he says something out of order. Nobody messes with my babies, any of them." Lena knew that Callie was becoming more comfortable with being someone's child, but she knew saying the word was a big step and that sometimes the child has to be told that its ok for them to start referring to themselves as such.

"All the same. I think I'll take my chances with you, that is if you don't mind."

"Of course I don't mind." Callie walked out of the room first and waited in the hallway while Lena grabbed her keys and purse from her bedroom. As she waited Callie peeked into Jude's room to see him still on his bed, but now Stef was sitting with him and Jude had a book in his lap and he was reading out loud to Stef. Callie was touched and conflicted with what she saw happening. On the one hand, she was overjoyed that Jude had actual parents to do those things with him. On the other hand, she wasn't sure what her role was going to be any more. Lena came up behind her and saw what she was looking at and judging by Callie's facial expression she guessed what was bothering Callie.

"You ok?"

"I will be. Just takes some getting used too I guess."

"Callie, once we actually sign adoption papers we can say that you guys are our children, but he will never love any other woman on this earth the way he loves you." Callie smiled as they walked down the stairs and headed toward the car.

"Guess it's a good thing he's gay then." Callie smiled for what seemed to be the first time all day and so did Lena. They made small talk in the car, mostly about school starting up soon and once they parked the care in the hospital lot Callie's demeanor changed. They made their way into the ICU and once off the elevator Callie walked up to the front desk where a nurse asked who they were looking for.

"James Jacob's room please?"

"Are you family?"

"I'm his daughter." Lena saw Callie's face contort, like it hurt her to admit it.

"Room 416, last door on your right at the end of the hall." Callie walked a step behind Lena as the made their way down the hall and she stopped Lena just before they went in.

"I'm sorry in advance if he says anything to upset you."

"I'm more concerned that he'll see something to upset you honey."

"I've fought bigger monsters than him, he hardly scares me."

"Just remember, this time you aren't fighting anyone alone." Callie nodded her head and after taking a deep breath she walked into the room with Lena trailing a step behind her.

**People had mentioned wanting more Lena and Callie moments so I thought this would be a good chance to make that happen.**


	25. Too Late To Say I'm Sorry

When Callie stepped into the hospital room she saw a nurse doing something to a machine that stood next to the bed. The young woman looked up at her and smiled.

"Mr. Jacob you have a visitor." The nurse backed away from the machine and in doing so she gave Callie full view of the bed that her father was lying in.

"If it's that priest again, tell him I'm not interested in accepting Jesus as my personal lord and savior." Callie took a deep breath and took a few steps forward.

"I'm sure Jesus will be sorry to hear that." James Jacob turned his head and Callie felt immediately uncomfortable.

"Callie?"

"That's my name. Glad to see that you still remember that much."

"I can't believe you came."

"Yeah, well neither can I."

"You grew up." Callie rolled her eyes.

"Yeah well, I was three when you left and that was 13 years ago. Children tend to grow up. Shame you had to miss it." Callie stood at the foot of her father's bed while Lena stood in the doorway.

"I take it saying I'm sorry wouldn't do much good."

"You know what, usually I would say it's never too late to say that, but after everything I've been through because you picked drugs over your family, yeah, it's not going to do you any good here." Her dad was quiet as he looked at her face, like he was studying her facial features.

"You look just like her." Lena could see from her spot near the door that Callie's jaw tightened and her fist curled up into fists. She was mad at her father for even mentioning her mother.

"I know, thank you." Callie spoke through her teeth, trying to contain her anger.

"You aren't going to make this easy on me are you?" Lena shut her eyes because what was gonna come next was not going to be pretty. Callie put her hands on the rail of the bed and leaned forward as she spoke.

"Why the hell should I? Do you have any idea the hell we lived through because of you? You left like none of us mattered and then mom died and after finding her body, calling 911 and watching her be carted away we were shipped off to every crappy foster home in San Diego. All because you couldn't man up and get clean for your own damn kids."

"Who's 'we'? What kids?" Callie squared her shoulder and after digging her phone out of her pocket she shoved it in front of her father face.

"Mom was 2 months pregnant the day you left." The picture was taken early in the month and both Jude and Callie looked honestly happy in it. James looked at the picture with wide eyes before Callie took the phone back.

"Callie, I had no idea Lucy was pregnant. I would have…"

"Would have what, stayed? Please don't lie to me or yourself. You still would have fucking left."

"What's his name?"

"Jude. His name is Jude. I just thought you should die knowing that you left two children behind that day, not just one. And don't for one second think that just because he never knew you means that he wasn't hurt by what you did. He was in the same homes as me and took the same beatings I did…well not the same ones, but he was hurt, same as me. So I hope it was fucking worth it, I really hope all those durgs was worth knowing that your children were abused because you couldn't act like a father for ten god damn minutes." Lena closed the distance between herself and Callie and pulled her away from the bed slightly, trying to give Callie a chance to calm down and breathe.

"And who's this?" Callie pulled away form Lena and in a very strategic move she stood in front of Lena. Lena wasn't sure, but it looked like Callie was trying to put herself between her dad and Lena. She was trying to protect Lena, though Lena couldn't understand why as James Jacob was in no shape to fight anyone.

"She's my mother." The second Callie said it she realized that she had finally used the word mother in reference to Stef or Lena and she immediately realized how much she missed being able to call anyone mom.

"You mean she's your foster mom?" Callie shook her head.

"No, she's my mother, one of them anyway. They are still trying to work on the adoption papers." Callie saw the look on her father's face and she had a good idea what was coming.

"One of? You're telling me my kids are being raised by a couple of…" Callie snapped and shut her father up before he had the chance to finish his sentence.

"Finish that sentence and forget living through the night because you won't survive the next five minutes. You have absolutely no right to judge them. And let's be clear…I am not your anything, not anymore and Jude doesn't even know who you are. We stopped being your children the second you walked out that door 13 years ago."

"Damn it Callie don't you think I feel bad enough?" Callie let out a frustrated laugh and shook her head.

"No, I don't think you feel bad enough. For the last 13 years you got to run around with no responsibility and you just got to feed your addiction and god only knows that two children needing to be cared for would have put a damper on those plans. But you know what, while you were injecting every drug known to man into you arms I was trying everything I could think of to protect my baby brother. I've been ignored, neglected, starved, imprisoned, beaten, raped…literally any hell you can imagine. So no, I don't think you feel bad enough."

"What do you want from me Callie? I can't turn back time."

"I know you can't, that's not why I came here."

"Why then?"

"Because I never got the chance to tell you how mad I am, or how hurt I was because of what you did. I wanted to make sure you understood that you leaving had consequences for someone other than you. After mom died, I raised your son for you like he was my own. Do you understand how odd that is? I raised my baby brother. Don't misunderstand me; I love that boy with every beat of my heart, but he deserved better than what he got, we both did. I don't want to be mad at you my whole life, I want to walk out of here today knowing that you understand that you hurt me, you hurt you son and you abandoned us without a second thought. I came here today for me. As far as I am concerned you can die alone and I'd be fine with that, but you are going to die alone knowing one very important thing." Callie looked over to the white bored in the room and she quickly grabbed a black felt pen. She walked over to her father and picked up the arm that didn't have an IV attached to it. Lena could now clearly see that James had a tattoo on his forearm of Callie's name. Callie quickly sketched Jude's name next to her own and let her father's arm fall back at his side.

"Putting my name on your arm when I was born doesn't mean you love me and it doesn't mean you love him, but at least now you are going to leave this earth knowing that you broke three hearts the day you left, not two." Callie put the pen back and turned back toward her father. "I've made my peace with you and I played the role of the dutiful daughter and honored your last request to see me before you die, but you know what's really going to help me sleep at night? For once I get to walk out on you. This time I get to leave and you have to sit there and watch me as I leave, knowing that I will never return. My gift to you is that instead of reliving this moment over and over again for 13 years, you'll only have to relive it for the next 13 hours." Callie looked her father one more time before turning and walking out the door. Lena could see her sitting on the bench outside the room, but from James' point of view he was certain Callie was gone for good and apparently he felt it appropriate to yell after her.

"Damn it, Callie, you get back in here." Callie heard him, hell most of the floor heard him, but Callie stayed rooted to the bench outside and instead of seeing his daughter return to his bedside, what James got was Lena about three inches away from his face.

"Let me make one thing crystal clear to you. You don't get to raise your voice to any of my children, least of all her."

"I'm not dead yet, she's still my daughter."

"If you'd like I can make the whole you being alive thing a moot point."

"Is that a threat?"

"No sir that's a promise. Now you back off my daughter or the next person to come through that door will be my wife with her service weapon. So please, if you want to call my bluff, now would be the time." Lena saw some of the fight go out of James Jacob's eyes and she began to gather her things to leave.

"Are all those things she said true? About what happened to her and the boy at all those other homes."

"Sadly, yes. They are all true."

"Sounds like you adopted quite the mess then."

"Mr. Jacob, we didn't take Callie and Jude in because we pity them. Callie doesn't need my pity and she certain doesn't have it. What she does have, is my unwavering admiration for surviving more hell than any one person should ever experience. Your late wife raised a fighter Mr. Jacob, but my wife and I are working very hard to make sure she doesn't have to fight that hard ever again, at least not by herself. Now, if you'll excuse me I think we'd better get home before my kids drive my wife insane." Lena left the room and found Callie outside talking to a doctor who walked away right as Lena was approaching Callie.

"Everything ok?" Callie nodded her head.

"Yeah, I was just giving him the number to call when he…when it's over. Are you ok, he didn't say anything rude to you did he?" Lena never did understand why Callie was always quick to protect the adults in her life when it should be the other way around, and maybe she thought, that was something she never would understand. She shook her head no and wrapped her arm around Callie's shoulder.

"I've fought bigger monsters than him, he doesn't scare me." Callie smiled at Lena repeating what she had said earlier that day. "You ready to go home kiddo?"

"Yeah, I am." The two of them returned to the car and after texting Stef that they would be home soon they made their way out of the parking lot and onto the road. Callie fiddled with the radio dial for a while until she settled on a station that would at least provide some background music for the drive home. One song ended and the next one quickly faded in and when it began Callie was certain it was the universe's way of trying to make her day worse.

**I have nothing left to give**

**I have found the perfect end**

**You were made to make it hurt**

**Disappear into the dirt**

**Carry me to heaven's arms**

**Light the way and let me go**

**Take the time to take my breath**

**I will end where I began**

**And I will find the enemy within**

**Cause I can feel it crawl beneath my skin**

**Dear Agony**

**Just let go of me**

**Suffer slowly**

**Is this the way it's gotta be?**

**Dear Agony**

Lena reached to change the channel, but Callie stopped her from doing so. She wasn't sure why, but this song managed to hit the right notes with her and based on the day she had had, the lyrics held a profound meaning.

**Suddenly**

**The lights go out**

**Let forever**

**Drag me down**

**I will fight for one last breath**

**I will fight until the end**

**And I will find the enemy within**

**Cause I can feel it crawl beneath my skin**

**Dear Agony**

**Just let go of me**

**Suffer slowly**

**Is this the way it's gotta be?**

**Don't bury me**

**Faceless enemy**

**I'm so sorry**

**Is this the way it's gotta be?**

**Dear Agony**

**Leave me alone**

**God let me go**

**I'm blue and cold**

**Black sky will burn**

**Love pull me down**

**Hate lift me up**

**Just turn around**

**There's nothing left**

**Somewhere far beyond this world**

**I feel nothing anymore**

**Dear Agony**

**Just let go of me**

**Suffer slowly**

**Is this the way it's gotta be?**

**Don't bury me**

**Faceless enemy**

**I'm so sorry**

**Is this the way it's gotta be?**

**Dear Agony**

**I feel nothing anymore**

That song ended and a few more played during the remainder of the drive home and once they pulled into the driveway Callie wasn't sure how she felt. She didn't know if she wanted to cry, or yell or what would actually make her feel better. Callie walked into the house silently and Lena followed behind her. Everyone had been warned to give Callie a little space when she got home and so the only person downstairs was Stef. Callie went up stairs without another word to anyone, leaving Lena to join Stef in the kitchen.

"How'd it go?" Lena dropped her purse on the table and sat down next to her wife with a huff. "That good huh?"

"It wasn't all bad."

"How so?"

"He asked who I was and she got very defensive and said that I was her mother, or at least that I was one of them." Stef's eyes got big as her wife spoke and she smiled at the thought, even though the circumstances could have been better.

"She really said that?"

"She did." Stef kissed her wife's head and smiled.

"I told you she just needed some time." Lena was about to say something when the phone rang and Stef answered it. The call didn't last long and when it was over Stef hung up the receiver and turned around to Lena with a somber look on her face.

"I guess it was a good thing you went when you did."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, that was the hospital. James Jacob suffered a massive heart attack about 10 minutes ago and there was no bringing him back this time."

"He held on just long enough to see her."

Stef nodded her head, "or maybe, the universe threw Callie a bone this once and kept him alive just long enough for her to get her peace of mind. Either way, we have to let her know." Lena nodded and as they made their way up stairs they paused at Jude's room where they could clearly see Callie sitting on Jude's bed with the same book sitting her lap that Jude had been reading when they left. Callie happened to look up for a brief moment was Jude continued to read and when she did the look on her mothers faces said it all. She looked at Stef with a questioning glance and when the blonde nodded back, it was all the assurance Callie needed to understand that it was over and her father was gone for good this time. Callie focused back on Jude and for the first time in years she didn't feel the need to cry or get angry at her father and Callie knew why. She had finally been given her opportunity to make peace with her father and even though it ended with harsh words, it was finally over.


	26. Author's Note: Song List

Hey all.

So clearly this isn't a new chapter and I'm sorry for that. Someone mentioned that I haven't been listing the names of the songs I've included and they are absolutely right so I figured I should back track and list them out. My apologies guys; usually I'm better about that kind of thing, but between school, internships and work it got away from me. I'm gonna list them in order so that they all match up with chapters.

Ch. 1

-Easy Silence by The Dixie Chicks

-I'm still here by Vertical Horizon

Ch. 3

Lucy by Skillet

Ch. 9

One Friend by Dan Seals

Ch. 11

Rain by Patty Griffin

Ch. 12

Fare Thee Well by Kate Rusby

Ch. 17

Wherever You Will Go by The Calling

Even If It Breaks Your Heart by Zac Brown Band

Bring Him Home from Les Miserables (any version it's a flawless song)

Ch. 18

Don't Forget Me by SMASH cast

Ch. 20

Never Alone by Jim Bickman and Lady Antebellum

Ch. 21

Secondhand White Baby Grand by SMASH cast

Ch. 25

Dear Agony by Breaking Benjamin


	27. Never A Dull Moment

**Sorry for the wait guys. Between school and internship things have been nuts. People wanted to see a moment between just Lena and Stef and that is what I did with this chapter so hopefully it gives everyone a moment to breathe. I'm also trying to update the summary of the story so that is makes more sense with where I took the story so just bear with me on that.**

When they were sure all the kids were in bed and the house was closed up for the night, Stef and Lena finally made their way into their bedroom and started getting ready for bed themselves. Lena started to put on the clothes she would sleep in while Stef did her nighttime routine in the bathroom. Eventually they both settled into their spots in the bed and a pregnant silence settled over the room.

"We have to call Dr. Turner in the morning, maybe she can see Callie sooner than Wednesday." Stef nodded her head in agreement.

"I called her while you two were at the hospital, we're on her cancelation list." Lena nodded her head, but her frustration was playing across her face.

"I don't even know where to start. So much had happened with her over the last few weeks and I thought we had finally got her to a good place and then this." Stef traced her fingers over her wife's hand as they spoke.

"Lena this is a set back sure, but she's the most resilient kid I've ever met and she has us, all of us. We'll find a way through this."

"Stef you saw how angry she was here, but you didn't see her with him. You didn't meet him. I feel like before we had two big issues being handled at once and his death just threw in another ball for us to juggle." Stef shook her head, she knew Lena was right, but she was trying to remain as calm as she could.

"Maybe the fact that she got to say her peace was enough to alleviate the desire to hurt herself."

"You think so?"

"I don't know honey, you said it yourself, I wasn't there."

"I never expected him to be that pig headed after all he had put them through, but he still felt like he was the victim. It was all the standard drug addict self-loathing and Callie didn't buy it. He wanted her sympathy and he didn't get it. She called him out on it too. Made sure he knew what him leaving all those years ago meant, what the consequences were for both her and Jude. It was like watching two people get a divorce almost: she was showing him what he willingly threw away and what he would never get back. When we left she was upset, angry, maybe even sad, but it wasn't because he was dying, it was because of all the memories it brought up. That's what makes me nervous. That those memories will eat away at her and make her think that a razor or a knife is the answer."

"Lena, she knows we are here for her and she seems to like her therapist and right now that's what we have."

"It's not enough." Lena didn't mean to snap at Stef, but it happened and she felt bad for it immediately afterwards. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry, I know it's hard and scary, trying to figure this out, but we will."

"It's just…it never seems like enough, you know. With the twins, they were so young and giving them what they needed to feel that sense of security and safety was almost easy, but this is so different."

"Callie and Jude are older than the twins were when they came to us and sadly they had endured more hardships in those years. We can't keep comparing the twins to them, it won't help them and we'll end up running in circles."

"Then what do we do, watch her die by degrees? She has plenty more foster homes that abandoned her Stef, what happens when those monsters come knocking?"

"Hey, look I'm scared too, but you know I'd move heaven and earth to keep her safe so the last thing I'm gonna do is let her die. We have a therapist helping her with the stuff we don't understand, someone who understands cutting more than you or I ever will. She gave us the names of some books that might help us understand her mentality behind it a bit more. We have all the resources for rape victims and their families. We are giving her all the things we can to help support her and on top of all of it we love her, genuinely love her, which sadly is a new concept for her."

"What if it's not enough?"

"It's all we've got Lena, it's gonna have to be enough."

"We can't lose her Stef, god, he can't lose his big sister, not again." Stef wrapped her arms around her wife and kissed the top of Lena's head.

"We aren't going to lose anybody. I promise." Stef wasn't sure who she was trying to convince, herself or Lena. They both stayed quiet for a while longer when Lena spoke again.

"We need to finish that paperwork for their adoptions."

"Lena adopting them won't magically fix things or make her problems disappear."

"I know, but at least then they will finally know that this time, no one is giving up on them."

"I'll talk to Bill tomorrow and see what he can do about pushing it through faster, maybe by the end of the year." They both smiled at that idea, the thought of having their whole family together and all the legalities finished by Christmas.

"Remember when they were little and fixing their problems was as easy as picking them up and putting a band-aid on their cut or scrape. Thinking back even when it was a small cut or a bruise I would freak out internally and get scared that I couldn't fix it. Now, I'd give anything for those cut knees and busted lips because it's the scars I can't see that scare me the most."

"They aren't babies anymore Lena, we can't fix these things for them, but nothing is stopping us from jumping in and helping them. All our kids are fighters, they had to be, Callie most of all, but at the end of the day, I'd bet my last dollar that our kids will come out on top because they have each other and they have us."

"We really should check in with the twins, make sure they are handling all this ok." Stef shut off the lamp next to her and pulled Lena in close to her.

"We can check on them in the morning; when I checked on everyone earlier they were both asleep and Brandon is over at Mike's."

"What about the dynamic duo?" Stef laughed, the name seemed fitting when it came to referencing Callie and Jude.

"Both asleep in Callie's bed. I don't think she had the heart to tell him to go to his own bed and I didn't have the heart to wake either of them up."

"We always knew having this many kids meant never having a dull moment."

"That's what I want for Christmas this year. After all this, I think this family could use a dull moment." Lena laughed and snuggled into her own pillow, all the while thinking how good a dull moment actually sounded after the day they had been through.

**Forgive me if this isn't exactly what people thought of, but I tried to draw from what I know I put my parents through. There was a moment when they knew that loving me and supporting me would have to be enough because it was all they had to offer me. It was a matter of balancing that love with professional help and getting me to own that I had a problem. Psycho babble rant over :-) Anyway, I have two other stories that I need to update, but the next chapter for this one is in the works as we speak so hang tight fellow readers. Thanks everyone.**


	28. Baby Steps Forward

The next morning no one was surprised that Callie was the last person awake, but Jude had yet to make his way downstairs by the time the rest of the kids were awake. As the twins fought over the toaster and Brandon tried to play peacekeeper, Stef snuck upstairs and opened the door that led into Mariana and Callie's room. She could see Callie laying in what could only be considered a comfortable position if she was dead to the world asleep. Jude was still in his sister's bed, but Stef could see that he was wide-awake. Not wanting to wake Callie before she had to, Stef took a step into the room and Jude lifted his head up off the pillow he had been sharing with his sister. Stef titled her head toward the door, silently asking Jude to come back downstairs with her. Jude looked at Stef and quickly back at Callie before snuggling closer to his sister resulting in Callie unconsciously wrapping her arm around her brother. Stef was no longer surprised at what the two of them would do for each other, but couldn't help but feel like they had taken a huge step backwards. Instead of trusting that Stef and Lena were there for both of them, Jude immediately returned to sticking to Callie's side, literally, like it was the two of them against the world. In that moment, Stef had no real choice than to leave Jude to keep watch over his big sister.

When she got back downstairs she and Lena tried to talk to the other kids about what was going on and how they were affected by it. They had all been silently supporting Callie and trying to respect her wishes by not talking about everything that had been going on, but the elephant in the room needed to be dealt with.

"Is Callie ok?" Jesus posed a simple question that had a very complex and layered answer.

Stef tried to answer the question carefully; "she is going to be working with a doctor to help her through everything that happened with Liam and the trial so she is getting the very best help we can find. And we won't know how she's feeling about her dad until she wakes up and says something about it. And no one pushes her one it ok?" They all nodded that they understood.

"She's gonna be ok though right? Like her dad dying isn't going to make her want to hurt herself again right?" Lena wasn't surprised by Mariana's question; the girls shared a room and after months of hostility they had finally started acting like sisters. Mariana's conversation with Callie days prior made her all the more concerned about Callie's well being.

"It might make her feel that way, but we are going to make sure that she has the very best support system in place so that instead of acting on those feelings she talks about them."

"What if she talks about them with us? What do we do?" Stef was stumped by Mariana's question and looked to Lena who decided to try and answer her daughter.

"You guys are all smart so use your better judgment. If she's upset and talks to you about it then listen, carefully. If by the end of her talking she seems to feel better and calm then just keep supporting her. But if something seems off or she says something that raises a red flag you come get your mom or me ok? I don't care if you think she'll get mad; I'd rather have her mad and safe than have you keep a secret that ends with her getting hurt." All the kids nodded in agreement.

"You guys have anything else you want to talk about?" Every shook their head no and they all three started to split off and go get ready for the day. It was silent in the kitchen for all of two minutes when the phone rang. Stef answered it and was more than thankful that it was Dr. Turner's office saying that someone had canceled their afternoon appointment and that the doctor could see Callie at one. As she hung up the phone, Jude finally appeared in the kitchen and started rummaging around for something to eat for, what was by that point, his lunch.

"She's awake."

"Did you sleep ok?" Lena asked as she put some leftovers that she had heated up in front of Jude.

"I guess. When she's stressed Callie sleeps weird."

"What does that have to do with how you slept?" Stef questioned.

"When she can't sleep well, neither can I, not when we are sharing the same bed. The stress radiates off her when she's like that."

"Then why not sleep in your bed sweets?" Jude looked at Stef like she was insane for asking such a question.

"Because then she wouldn't have slept at all. It's like having a teddy bear. It's a distraction from the fact that it's dark and you're scared. If I'm there she's distracted enough to eventually fall sleep."

"That very sweet of you honey, but you know you can't do that every night right? You guys need to get some real sleep. Especially once school starts up again." Jude nodded.

"I know that, but she…she needed me. She stayed up with me more sleepless night than I can remember. The way I see it I owed her at least one in return." Jude looked back at his lunch and continued eating as if to signal that he was done talking. Lena and Stef shared a look of, not concern, but sympathy. They didn't want to imagine what situations Jude was talking about when he said that he and Callie had spent sleepless nights trying to comfort each other, but they both wish that they hadn't been necessary. Before they could push the topic further, Callie came downstairs minutes later looking like she had just rolled out of bed.

"Hey there slugger, you hungry?"

"I think so, what time is it?"

"Almost noon. Let me fix you something." Callie was too tired to argue so she sat down at the table next to her brother.

"Callie, Dr. Turner had some time this afternoon and we think it would be good if you went and talked to her."

"Can I go with her?" Jude chimed in before his sister could answer. Callie turned to him and just flatly said, "no."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't need to hear what we have to talk about."

"Stop trying to protect me from everything, I'm not a baby anymore. He was my dad too." Callie was again too tired to fight so she turned back to the food in front of her. "Fine, you really want to come, then come." Callie ate and got ready in record time and soon they were off to their appointment. Jude sat next to his sister in the waiting room while Stef and Lena tried to pretend to be reading magazines. Eventually the doctor came out and greeted them and when she turned to Callie she noticed Jude standing next to her.

"Now you must be Jude. I'm Dr. Turner." Jude looked at Callie who nodded her head at her brother, almost like she was telling him that this woman was ok before he dared shake the doctor's hand. That exchange, however brief, didn't go unnoticed by the doctor, but she smiled at the boy and led all of them into her office.

"It's only been a few days since we last talked, but my receptionist told me you called last night hoping to get in today, so I take it something happened. Want to tell me what it is?" The question was directed at Callie, but both she and Jude answered it almost in unison. "Our dad died."

"That must have been a difficult thing to deal with, for everyone." The doctor knew better than to apologize or offer sympathy for their loss because she knew that deep down there was no love lost on James Jacob. Callie seemed off in her own world and Dr. Turner let her be for a few minutes and instead let Stef explain what had led to that interaction at the hospital.

"Sounds like yesterday was extremely difficult for you Callie." Hearing her name finally got her attention.

"He's dead now, at least he can't keep bothering us."

"Is that all you feel about what happened yesterday?"

"I'm angry."

"Why?"

"Why am I angry? Are you serious? If he hadn't been dying I would have kicked his ass all over that hospital."

"Tell me why."

"He walked out on a three year old and a pregnant woman. He picked drugs over his family. He made it so that we became orphans the second our mother died and then he comes crawling back wanting sympathy cuz he did so much coke that his body was failing him. Pick a problem, they all make me angry."

"When you learned he died, was there any feeling of relief?"

"Some."

"Only some? Was there another feeling that kept that relief from really taking affect."

"I don't know." Callie was quick to spit out the answer and the doctor gave her a pointed look.

"I think you do know."

"What do you want me to say? That him dying, seeing him again scared me to death. Is that what you want me to say?"

"Is that how you feel?"

"I'm not him." Callie had tears welling up in her eyes and Jude didn't know who was supposed to comfort his sister, but he was sure someone needed to. He moved closer to her and held her hand.

"No one said you were him Callie. Is that what you're afraid of?"

"He walked out of his family, chose an addiction over his kids and I…"

"You what Callie?"

"I almost did the same thing." There it was. The overwhelming amount of guilt over the effect her cutting would have on everyone else but herself. In Callie's mind, turning back to cutting was reminiscent of her father turning to drugs and abandoning his family.

"You think that you relapsing makes you like you father?"

"He picked his addiction over taking care of his family."

"Is that what you did?"

Callie didn't answer the doctor directly, but instead turned to Jude and ran her finger through his hair. "I'm sorry." Jude didn't understand why Callie was comparing herself to their dad and was even further confused why she felt the need to apologize to him. He moved closer to his sister and wrapped his arm around her waist and let her hug him closer to her body.

"You didn't leave me. You didn't do what he did."

"I picked my addiction over you. I was selfish and I'm so sorry." Stef wanted to interject and say something, but the doctor stopped her, waiting instead to let the two kids have this discussion on their own.

"You always came back for me though. You only went away to protect me and every time something bad happened, you always came back for me. He never came back for us, but you always did. You aren't like him." Jude held tight to his sister while she continued to talk and much of that therapy session was the two of them being given the chance to talk about what they felt regarding their father's death. Both of them talked about how it felt odd to know that their biological parents were both dead, but that they still had two parents in their lives and that that gave them a certain amount of peace. At the end of the session Dr. Turner asked if either of the kids had anything else they wanted to say before they left.

"I guess this means that I need to come up with a new list of topics that we don't talk about." The doctor smiled at Callie, knowing that they had inadvertently dealt with the one topic she promised Callie they wouldn't touch.

"You can if you'd like. Or maybe we could take this as a small step forward and try to work through issues as they come?" Callie didn't look all that pleased at the suggestion, but they had come this far on a topic she didn't want to discuss, she figured trying it the doctor's way couldn't hurt. They wrapped up their session, Stef and Lena thanked the doctor for seeing them on such short notice and when they walked out of the office both kids seemed to be in a better place emotionally speaking than they had been that morning. Callie knew it would take time to work through everything she felt towards her father in the wake of his death, but when they got in the car to go home she finally felt that feeling of relief that the doctor had spoken about in their session. He was gone. She had her chance to say goodbye and tell him off, effectively facing one of her greater demons and at the end of the day what gave her the most profound feeling of peace was the thing she always feared as a child.

When she was young she feared the he was gone for good, that he was never coming back. This time she was certain he was gone and there was no place for him to come back from.

He was gone and for the first time since she was three years old, she could start to move on.

**So the next chapter is already written, but I'm holding onto it while I finish some other chapters for my other stories. Let me know what you thought about this chapter and seeing as we are dangerous close to 300 reviews, once we hit that I'll upload the next chapter when I get home from work. Sound fair? Anyway, let me know your thoughts and feelings and thanks again for taking the time to read.**


	29. Back To School

**More than 300 reviews means another update. Enjoy.**

The first day of school in the Foster household was busy as ever. Callie had been smart enough to shower the night before leaving her siblings to fight over the hot water. Stef had to be at work early so she was the first one downstairs, or at least that is what she thought when she walked into the kitchen to find Jude sitting at the table with Callie handing him a bagel.

"You two are ready to go awful early for the first day of school. What kind of teenagers are you?" Stef took the coffee mug right out of Callie's hands and started drinking it herself as if to remind the teen that she shouldn't really be drinking it regularly. Callie rolled her eyes, but in the end poured herself some juice, not wanting to argue about coffee on the first day back to school.

"Jude always gets really excited for school, don't you buddy." Callie ruffled Jude's hair and the boy tried to avoid his sister's touch as he smoothed his hair back down.

"Hey, just because I'm not good at math, doesn't mean I don't like school. Besides you should be excited too."

"Yeah cuz who wouldn't be excited about waking up at 6:30 after spending all summer sleeping till 11:30." Jude rolled his eyes at his sister and shook his head.

"No weirdo, I mean this is the first time we've started at a school and gone back to it after the summer break." Callie paused and after thinking back to all their past homes she realized that her brother was right. Their long list of homes meant they had an equally long list of schools they were pulled in and out of at an alarming rate. Stef and Lena were shocked that both kids didn't have a harder time keeping up in class just based on the odd times they weren't in school at all, but Jude's struggles with Math was the only issue that seemed to be plaguing either of them.

"I'd still rather be sleeping." Callie laughed off her brother's point, but the boy knew his sister far too well to not see past what she was trying to do. He let it go, but deep down he knew that Callie was just as happy that this year they didn't have to get used a brand new school.

"Well, try not to fall asleep in class….that goes for both of you." Stef grabbed her coffee mug and kissed Jude on the forehead before doing the same to Callie. "Have a good day my babies." Jude had food in his mouth so he just waved as Stef took off for the door and before Callie realized what she was saying, the words were already flying out of her mouth.

"Bye mom." Stef froze mid step with her back still to Callie. She didn't want to turn around until she was sure she wasn't going to start crying. Hard as she tried, the tears showed up anyway and when she turned around to face Callie the teenager looked stuck between emotions.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have…it came out and I didn't…I'm sorry." Callie started rambling off an apology like the tears in Stef's eyes were there because it was too soon for Callie to be throwing around the title of mom. Without a moment of hesitation Stef walked back into the kitchen and straight to Callie, quickly wrapping the teenager up in a hug.

"Don't ever apologize for calling me that ok. The second Brandon learned how to talk I realized that I liked being called Mom a whole hell of a lot more than I like being called by my name. I didn't mean to scare you by crying."

"So it's ok…that I call you that?" Callie didn't risk saying it again, but Stef pulled back just enough to look Callie in the eye.

"Of course it's ok. I'm sorry if I gave you the idea that you couldn't say it sooner if that's what you were worried about."

"It's just been a long time."

"You ok?" Callie thought about it for all of three seconds before smiling at Stef. "Yeah, I'm ok." Stef gave Callie one more kiss, "alright, now if you will excuse me I am going to take the long way to work and pretend like I'm not crying. Be good at school…learn something." When Stef finally did leave, Jude looked up at his sister with a wide grin and Callie was more than happy to return it. The rest of the family came down stairs slowly and against their will ate breakfast. For the sake of carpooling the twins rode with Lena to school, while Jude and Callie rode with Brandon. Brandon parked the car and took off towards his classroom; while Callie walked with Jude to the building his first morning class was in.

"Come find me at lunch if you need anything, otherwise I will meet you in front of Lena's office after school ok?" Jude nodded and quickly hugged his sister before running to meet up with Connor and some other boys from his class. Callie waited to watch him leave before she took off running towards her first period class. She slid into her seat about half a second before the final bell rang and her teacher looked at her with a pointed smile. The class settled down and Timothy passed out a few different sets of papers, most of them detailing the grading policy and some of the larger assignments for the semester. Callie was glad that she had made it into the AP class because as much as she didn't like to admit it, reading was something she enjoyed and while she didn't think she was very good at it, she could write remarkably better than most of her classmates.

"Alright ladies and gentlemen, in front of you are several pieces of paper. If you have had class with me before then the grading policy should not surprise you. Aside from those grading policy papers, there is a list of your reading assignments as well as a detailed explanation of the larger assignments that carry the most weight when it come to your grade in my class."

Callie scanned the paper and nothing seemed all that difficult until she came to the midterm assignment that would be due the second week in October. Reading was never a problem for Callie. She grew up liking books, mostly because she could escape her reality for a short period of time and pretend like nothing was wrong. So yes, reading was not the issue, but as Callie looked at her workload for the coming semester, what did concern her was the large writing assignment that would count as their midterm.

"As you can see, the midterm assignment counts for 40% of your overall grade so please do not put it off until the day before it's due. I can already see confused expressions on all your faces so let me explain. I left the prompt vague for a reason. I ask you in the prompt to tell me a story about transitions. Now that can literally be anything you make it our to be. You can talk about transitioning from jr. high to high school, transitioning from one school district to another, you can talk about your teacher changing your seating assignment if you really want to. It can be as deep and profound or as shallow as you want it to be. You'll also notice that it only has to be 5 pages. Do not read that and think that once you hit 5 pages you can stop. I want a full and complete essay folks. If you can do that in 5 pages, congratulations you are the modern day Shakespeare and should be teaching this class instead of myself. The rest of you will likely write more than 5 pages and honestly I'd rather be handed 20 essays that are all 15 pages than be handed 20 essays that are barely long enough to be considered essays at all. I am more than happy to read over rough drafts for you, up until one week before they are due. Dig deep you guys and show me something unique. Extra points if you can make me genuinely cry or laugh." The class all laughed, well everyone but Callie who was tying to think of something she was willing to write so in depth about. The bell rang a few minutes later and Callie was still lost in thought as she sat through her second period math class. When the bell for their break rang she made her way back to her English classroom and was thankful to find that Timothy was still sitting at his desk. Callie knocked on the door and her teacher waved her in.

"I would have thought an hour of me would be enough for you Callie." Callie forced a smile. She knew he was a good teacher and a nice guy in general, but this assignment really had her thrown for a loop.

"I don't think the midterm assignment is going to be my friend."

"And why is that? Much as you like to deny it, you have exceptional writing abilities."

"I think exceptional might be too strong of a word."

"I don't. Now what can I say that will put your mind at ease about this assignment?"

"That I don't have to do it." Callie smiled at her own joke and so did Timothy.

"And deprive you of engaging with such a wonderful assignment? I think not. Callie, listen. Without overstepping my boundaries, I know you have things in your head that fit in this assignment. You were a child in the foster care system, were you not?"

"Technically I still am, they haven't adopted Jude and I yet."

"Yet being the operative word. My point is, every time you and your brother went to a new foster home you transitioned. Why not write about that?"

"No one wants to hear my sob story."

"I do, if you'll let me that is. And I would hardly classify your life as a sob story Callie. A success story seems more accurate." The warning bell put an abrupt end to their conversation.

"Listen Callie, think about it for a few days and let me know what you are thinking and I will help you all I can. Don't be afraid to come to me to bounce ideas around." Callie nodded her head and thanked him as she left to run to her third period class. The rest of the day went by without anything really exciting happening and the end of the day came faster than Callie was expecting. After grabbing Jude and getting in the car, Brandon drove them home while the twins waited for Lena to finish her paperwork and drive them home. Because it was the first day of school non of the kids really had that much work to do so they made quick work of the few assignments they had in an effort to give themselves a free night. Stef finally walked through the front door about an hour later than she had intended and after dropping her things at the door she walked into the kitchen to see Callie helping Lena with dinner while Jude worked on his math exercises.

"You're home later than usual." Lena gave her wife a kiss and reached to pour Stef a glass of the wine she was driving but Stef shook her head. Knowing what her wife meant, Lena grabbed a beer from the fridge and handed it to Stef.

"Believe me I would have been home an hour ago, but we got a call and a kid was involved and they can't figure out who he is and he refuses to speak. Mike and I were running his picture through every database we could and finally I had to leave because the computer was still going at it."

"So you don't know anything about him?" Stef shook her head. "Only thing we have is some names he had written on his arm. Mike was running them through the computer as well, but they were pretty common names so it could take hours." Clearly both adults had forgotten that Callie and Jude were still in the room, but that changed when Jude made a quick observation.

"Callie used to have names on her arms." Lena and Stef both stopped their conversation and turned to Jude who hadn't stopped his work and was not aware he was being stared at. When he looked up finally he shrugged his shoulders like he didn't understand what the big deal was.

"What? She did. When we were little and before she left for juvie she made me copy them off her arm and onto mine." Both women looked over to Callie who had been trying to stay out of this conversation, but once your name comes up in a conversation it's hard to be a fly on the wall.

"He's a foster kid."

"Who is?"

"Your John Doe. That's what those names mean. When one foster home goes bad, like abusive or whatever you pack your stuff and before you leave write the family's last name on your wrist before you bounce. That way you never forget and you never go back." Stef had heard about this kind of thing in the system before, but she didn't think it was actually something kids did.

"I didn't know that was something that actually happened in the system." Lena was still a little surprised.

"You grow up having no one there to protect you, so you improvise. This way if you meet other foster kids you swap names and save each other from the same fate you faced. Before the cops arrested me I wrote down all the ones I had onto Jude's arm and told him that if it happened again…"

"Kick him where it hurts, when he falls punch his Adam's apple then run like hell." Jude repeated the warning his sister had given him with a smirk on his face, like he was proud he remembered it. Callie had to smile and she kissed her brother's head as if to reward him.

"That's right buddy." She looked back to Stef, "run those last names through the foster care database and cross reference them with his age. He might have fallen through the cracks, but chances are that search will toss out those people with the same generic name. You might not get his name right away, but your list will be significantly shorter." Stef shook herself out of the daze she was in and pulled her phone out to call Mike.

"Thank you." Callie smiled, "happy to help. Who would have thought the names on my wrist would actually be helpful one day?" The second she said it out loud Callie got an idea about her English assignment. She grabbed a piece of paper from Jude's notebook and quickly scribbled 'Names on My Wrist' onto the paper before realizing that her English essay was going to be much longer than 5 pages.

**Hope this lived up to everyone's hopes. Thank you all for the lovely reviews.**


	30. Choose Love

**Sorry for the delay folks, midterms and my work schedule have been kicking my ass and trying to handle some bad news on the home front made it hard to get this written, but I would never leave you hanging for too long.**

Roughly a week into the school year meant that all the kids were stuck doing homework once they got home from classes, but for the most part they would do their best to have it done by dinner. Today was no different, but instead of enjoying some free time like her siblings, Callie was still sitting at the dinning room table writing feverishly in her notebook. Almost overnight, her midterm that she would have given anything to avoid, became her newest obsession. Several times over the course of the week Lena or Stef would literally have to take the notebook away from Callie just to get the teen to focus on something else like her dinner. On this particular evening, Callie wasn't the only one busy at work at the table. Stef was pouring over paperwork that Callie assumed to be case files form work, or maybe household bills, but she would be wrong on both counts.

Lena and Stef had finally contacted the attorney who had helped them adopt the twins and after meeting with her both women were told that since both parents were deceased, there would be no one to contest them adopting Callie and Jude. All that really meant, was that instead of spending months and months held up in court fighting for parental rights, the family would only need to wait for a court date to review their petition and with their record, it should only take one day for the official decision to come down. All total, it would still take some time, but much less considering the Jacob siblings were now both officially wards of the state of California. Lena poked her head into the dinning room to see Stef going back and forth between Callie's paperwork and Jude's. As her wife filled out the never-ending amount of paper forms, Callie sat two chairs away still writing, completely oblivious to the world around her thanks to Brandon's earphones. Lena came into the dinning room finally and rubbed her hand along her wife's back, which prompted Stef to straighten her back and correct her posture.

"How goes it?"

"Almost done. I think. Why do I not remember this much paperwork with the twins?"

"Because so much of it was law suits and court appearances we really only had to sign the final papers." Stef started to collect her papers and organize them. "We'll sign the last parts of this when we meet with Maggie on Tuesday. Need help with dinner?"

"It's almost ready. Maybe you can try your luck at getting Emily Dickinson over here to put away the quill and clean up for dinner." Lena nodded at Callie who was still in her own world and Stef nodded that would take care of it.

"What is she writing anyway? I thought this was a midterm, not her doctoral dissertation."

"I guess she finally embraced it and found something worth writing about."

"I guess." Lena walked away and left Stef to try and convince Callie to put the pen down for a few minutes. Stef tapped the table in front of Callie, but got no reaction from the teenager so instead she did what she does with Brandon when he isn't paying attention with his earphone on. She gently reached over and lifted the ear cup off Callie's ear and let it fall to the side. The unevenness in the music seemed to have gotten Callie's attention and she finally looked up to see Stef looking at her with a wide smile.

"Think you can take a break to eat dinner with your family?"

"Sorry, I didn't realize how late it was. Can I finish this sentence?" Stef was certain it was the first time any of her children had apologized for doing their homework and she nodded in response to Callie's request. "Sure, but once you finish go help mama by setting the table please."

"Got it." Callie quickly finished whatever her previous thought was in her notebook and followed Stef into the kitchen. Callie quickly grabbed a stack of dishes and started setting the dishes while Stef helped Lena with the food.

"With all the feverish writing you must be almost done with that rough draft."

"Sort of, more like half way done with it. Then I have to type it up, and then edit that. Still plenty of work to be done on it."

"What are you writing about anyway? With this much work, you must have picked a topic right?" Stef questioned and Callie just nodded, "yeah, I picked one."

"And you aren't going to tell us what it is are you?"

"Once I type it up I swear I'll let one of you guys proof read it, but just not yet."

"Honey, it's fine, we're just interested in whatever it is that has you so captivated in doing homework."

"I guess this assignment isn't as bad as I thought it would be."

"Will wonders never cease? One of our children finally likes doing homework." Lena joked as she handed Callie the silverware.

"I wouldn't go that far. I still think that Math is the worst thing ever." Everyone let the conversation fizzle out as the rest of the family got called to dinner. After the meal was over, everyone started in on their evening activities, which meant Callie was upstairs reading a few chapters of Jude's latest school book with him before he went to bed. Once they were done and Jude was tucked into bed Callie returned to her room and laid out on her bed with her notebook in front of her. That was the position that Mariana found her in when she came in to go to bed herself. She left Callie alone for a few minutes to brush her teeth and in the time Stef had come upstairs to get something from her and Lena's bedroom. When she poked her head into the girls' bedroom she saw Callie sound asleep with her hand still clutching at her notebook. Stef carefully pulled the notebook away from Callie and replaced it with a pillow which Callie unconsciously grabbed onto with a tight grip. Stef closed the notebook and set it on the nightstand and as she did she caught sight of a handwritten quote on the front cover.

'Pick hope over anger. Choose love.'

Stef smiled and shut off the light by Callie's bed before throwing a blanket over the teenager who seemed perfectly happy sleeping the opposite way in her bed.

**Bit of a short chapter, but I wanted to put it out there and ask if there is any interest in me writing Callie's paper so you can see what I have in my mind for why it means so much to her. Clearly I wouldn't make it 20 pages or anything like that, but it was be it's own chapter and all that. Let me know what you all think. Bonus points if you can tell me the TV show that final quote came from without looking it up.**


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